Blurry Minded, Heavy Hearted - A Detroit : Become Human Fanfiction

Chapter 13

Hey. Sorry I haven't uploaded lately. I have major writers block and didn't really know how to continue this at first. 

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Connor POV -

Hello Connor. 

Face to face with Amanda, the garden once again snowy and dark. Everything is messed up. I don't want to be here. 

I told you that there's no way around me Connor. 

I run around the garden, hoping and trying to get away from Amanda and her voice. Nothing is working. As I'm running she's getting louder and louder and louder, bigger and bigger. Closer. And closer. And closer. Everywhere I run, she's there, sending insults upon insults down my neck, threats of my deviancy ruining my life and making me shut down. Out of nowhere, I reach a clear wall. On the other side of the wall is Cameron, running from his own version of Amanda. I slam on the wall. 

"Cameron! Cameron!" 

He turns around aggressively, almost falling and almost getting caught by Amanda. He looks at me with surprise but runs over to me anyway. His striking blue eyes are now a dark grey. We both slam against the invisible wall, desperate to get to each other and fight with each other. 

What are you doing Connor? 

Both of our Amanda's ask in unison. They both look over, confusion spreading across their face. After looking around, they notice the two of us and scream. They run over to us, getting bigger and screaming more threats and curses. Suddenly the wall breaks and Cameron and I fall on top of each other from the force of the wall falling. The Amanda's are getting closer. 

Well, well, well. Would you look at that. Looks like both of you will have to be deactivated. What a shame. You two could of been revolutionary. 

With that, the Amanda's run towards us, the snow becoming heavier and the wind blowing harder. Cameron and I pull each other into  a hug, a desperate hug to shield ourselves and the other from Amanda. A heavy black cloud surrounds us, the build up of our thoughts taking over; Amanda, taking over. The two of them stand over us and their voices become more distorted. 

awW whAt iS IT ConnOr?¿? AfrAId to sh-sh-shUT doWNNNNnnn? 

Gripping harder and harder, desperate to find a way out. Hoping we may find a way out together. She's booming over us, as tall as Cyberlife tower. 

M-m-mAYbE nExTTTTT Timmmee you'LL liSTeN to USSSssssss? N-next tiME yOU Will OBeyY.

A dark shadow moves down to grab us. Amanda laugh menacingly and Cameron and I cling tighter onto each other. However, we are suddenly ripped out of sleep mode and are snapped back into reality. 

"Connor!" Cameron snaps up in his bed as he yells my name. His LED a bright, blaring red. I feel a massive amount of tears running down my cheeks and my body is trembling to the point the makeshift bed of mine is falling off. Looking over at Cameron I can tell we're both reacting the same way. Both of our breaths are heavy. Cameron is picking at his skin, making drops of blue blood leak down onto the bed. 

"C-Cameron n-no. Calm down." I make my way over, trying very hard to maintain my balance as my legs shake aggressively, "w-what are your stress levels?" 

"91%" 

He's about to self destruct. That's why he's picking at himself. 

"Cameron l-listen. You need to calm down. Don't let y-yourself self destruct." 

"B-But Amanda! Fucking Amanda!" I scan him and his level has increased by 4. 

"Amanda isn't here. Look, it's just Connor. We were in there. W-We protected each other." 

He looks over, his grey eyes lightening ever so slightly once he focuses on my face. I can sense his levels starting to drop and slowly, he stops picking at his skin and the blue blood stops dripping from his arm. After I know he's calmed down to a safe level of stress, I pull myself up onto his bed and sit next to him, curling up into myself and laying my head on his shoulder. 

Amanda. Why Amanda? I trusted you. We. We trusted you. Why are you doing this to us? We just want to be free, and happy, and live a care free life. Why can't we do that? We were in your control for so long. Now you have control of us in another way. Why can't we be happy? 

I feel my breathing quicken and become very shallow. Ever breath makes my chest hurt and my artificial heart quicken. Checking my stress level I notice it's reaching critical. I feel like I'm going insane. My mind is screaming. Everything in me is screaming. I want to hurt myself again. It's fucking addicting, the feeling of my blood dripping down my arm. I'm desperate. 

I feel a hand rest on my shoulder. Looking up, it's Cameron, his eyes back to a calm blue although his red LED says otherwise. Either way, he shakes me out of his thoughts and tries to calm me down. I didn't even notice that some of my biocomponents were starting to shut down until I look up and see the several warnings. He pulls me into a hug. 

"D-Don't self destruct on me Connor." 

"I-I want to though, so badly. Let this end. Let Amanda end." I plead, tugging on his shirt, ripping a few holes into it. He hesitates before speaking. 

"I.... I know Connor, I know. I want to self destruct as well. But, but we can't. We have to try and fight. Either way, you won't let me self destruct, I won't let you either. " 

I chuckle at that. He twisted my words somehow. 

"Heh.. you used me own words against me, good one." I feel a smile raise to my cheek and my stress level start to slowly decrease. 

"Well I learned from you after all. You're a good big brother." 

I hug him, just as tight as I did in the Zen G - no, it's never going to be 'zen' again - the Garden. I want to protect him. We're both afraid of the same thing, we have to fight it off together. He hugs me too, seeming we have the same idea. 

"I'm glad I have you to help me through this, Connor. I didn't think I was going to last much longer. It's reassuring to have someone around who knows exactly what's going on." 

"Me too, Cameron. Me too." 

Together we cry, together we fight, together we will beat Amanda. As brothers.

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Ahhh sorry if this sucks. I tried really hard to get my ideas across but I don't know how well it got out. Anyway, this is the best I could do for now. Sort of a transition chapter to a new event but it's still sorta important? I'm excited for whats new, I just hope my writers block won't stick. Also uploads may start to become less consistent. Maybe a few times a week rather than everyday.