BOSS | NCT

o56

A/n:

Aaah. :") I just want to say that thank you for loving Jeena from the moment you sympathized with her character up until now. I love and will never forget writing about her; I enjoyed expressing her thoughts to all of you. I feel glad that I was able to shape a character like her in my imagination. <3

*

"I WANT to go home," I breathed, as our lips slowly disconnected. "I think I won't last longer - "

He cupped my cheeks, grazed his thumb over my jaw, and pressed his lips to mine again tenderly.

I pulled away, aware of how chapped my lips might be. I can't even breathe properly - I wonder what my lips taste like. What does a dying person's lips taste like? Surely, it's not sweet and smooth enough for a boy to kiss it in full pleasure.

But Lucas kissed me like he didn't care at all on how my lips tasted. Or how it felt against his own. I bet it's not soft like before. It's not kissable; nor is it a healthy girl's mouth.

These lips are not for him anymore.

Jerking my face an inch away from him, my voice cracked as I whispered,  "I want to go home..."

He looked at me, a flash of sadness visible on his glimmering green eyes.

Softly he said, with a bead of sweat streaming down his face, "Then let's go home."

Then he stood up from his seat, towering above my small and fragile frame.

"I love you," I mumbled weakly.

He ignored my words, signalling the others to come down from the enormous rotating machine.

"I love you..." I said again, this time more of a whisper.

He looked at me silently. His mouth didn't open to say anything, but his eyes showed a lot of emotions.

"I love you," I said as I felt his arms lift me from my seat. "Yukhei, I love you," I let my face fall on his chest. "I love you, I really do," I said again as I pressed my ears onto his chest to listen to his heartbeat. "Yukhei," the name holds a thousand of memories. "Please say you love me too..."

Only then I realized when he pulled the door of the cabin open, that he didn't hear anything that came from my mouth. All those stupid I love yous were pointless and soundless and pathetic; they were just voices inside my brain.

My voice is gone. I lost it.

03:30:30

Everyone looked startled. Everyone looked sad. Everyone looked at me.

I looked at no one but him.

03:24:54

Lucas laid me at the backseat of a car. I kept the camera held in my hands.

02:34:56

I know I've always wished that the orphanage was a castle. But now, as I looked at it, I never felt so glad and satisfied.

This is no castle; this is home.

02:00:34

The pillows underneath my head are so soft. I could sleep in here. I could just close my eyes and fall asleep right here.

I am tired of the pain.