Smile

First for Hurt

I woke up by smashing my alarm against the wall. The ringing continued. Damn thing was indestructible I tell you. Groggily, I got out of bed and picked up the clock that I'd thrown turning the alarm off. My body on autopilot I showered and brushed my teeth and dressed. The smell of Vanessa's famous coffee is what woke me up.

Teetering down the stairs like a drunk I managed to find the kitchen. Vanessa was there mixing creamer and flavor into the coffee. It smelled absolutely delectable.

"Good morning, honey", she greeted me.

I waved at her dismissively, "Coffee. Too early", I mumbled. I was surprised by the fact I'd said something coherent.

Vanessa laughed and handed me a cup the size of my head. It was my Hello Kitty mug that I'd gotten when I was in Orlando. I wafted the steam toward my face and let the aroma stimulate my sleepy brain.

After taking a couple sips I was awake enough to open my eyes all the way and actually look around. The door/windows that led to the backyard patio were open letting in fresh air. I breathed deeply and was reminded of home. Goodness, I missed Wisconsin and my mom. She was always there for me like a second sun always there to light the way. Now that she's gone I feel sorta lost.

When Dad remarried I didn't know what to do and in the back of my mind I sort of hated Vanessa for taking my mom's place by his side. I'm older now and I don't hate her but she isn't my mother but she tries to be a good mother figure. Maybe I should try to be nicer to her. She's been apart of this family for eight years now but I still haven't accepted her fully.

"Thanks, Nessa. It's really good", I used the nickname my dad always regarded her with as I wandered aimlessly back up to my room.

It took me a solid half-hour to finish getting ready because I didn't bother doing my hair. I let my natural beachy waves fall down my back and around my shoulders. The sun had bleached my ends a pretty golden blonde, the tips nearly platinum. Natural highlights are the best I always thought because unlike a stylist, the sun never messes up.

My makeup consisted of mascara, eyeliner, and chapstick. I filled my eyebrows in but they didn't really need it, I was just bored. I'd dressed myself in my typical tank and shorts. Today's tank was a grey cotton/polyester mix that fit loosely with a pocket over the left breast. I tucked a piece into the front of my shorts and tugged so it looked messy but cute. Stepping into a pair of all black Buscemi and adding a gold chain, bangles, earrings, industrial bar and anklet I finished the look.

I filled up my coffee mug once again, grabbed my keys, lunch, snacks, and breakfast and headed out the door. "See you guys later. Have a good day!", I shouted into the house before leaving.

"Have a good day, sweetheart", Vanessa called.

"Love you, baby", my dad yelled from the kitchen.

I packed my food safely into the backseat and shut the door. Chris and Crawford and Karisma were all outside, getting ready to leave. Chris was patting himself down. Must have forgot his keys.

"You guys need a ride?", I asked dangling my keys from my index finger tauntingly hanging out of the window a bit.

Karisma and Crawford bound over to my car and Chris trailed behind helplessly. Karisma and Crawford piled into the back with my food, careful not to sit to close to it. Chris jumped into the passenger seat and we were off to school.

I didn't rush because we were sort of early. "So, are you nervous?", I asked to no one in particular.

"I'm not", Karisma smiled. "These two are though".

Crawford scoffed, "I am not. I'm actually kinda excited".

"You guys were home schooled, right?", I asked curiously. I remember it being brought up in a conversation their parents had with my dad and Vanessa. If that was the case this was going to be a big change.

"Yeah, but this will be a fun new experience", Chris said optimistically.

I half scoffed half laughed, "Yeah. High school's a blast".

Once at school I grabbed my bag from my locker and threw my food in, so I want juggling everything, and gathered a couple notebooks for class. I had shown Crawford and Karisma where their first period classes were and assumed some fans would help them find their way around the rest of the day. Chris and I had three classes together; French Advanced, Calculus, and Advanced Psychology. Right now I was on my way to Advanced English Literature and Composition or English Lit and Comp for short.

Chris had American History first hour. I showed him to his class although we had maybe fifteen minutes before class actually started.

"Alright, so if you need anything just text me. I can pretty much get out of any class if I need to so don't hesitate. K?", I knew he wouldn't need me long with all the girls that would be throwing themselves at him but I told him just in case.

"Thanks", he smiled his amazing smile that mesmerized me every time. "How much time do we have?".

I looked at my phone for the time. 7:47 AM. "Well, class doesn't officially start until 8:00 but it's good to be five minutes early for announcements and stuff like that, so eight minutes", I did the simple math in my head. "Wanna walk to the Commons to waste time?". The Commons were where everyone gathered in their cliques to discuss what happened the day before or over the weekend in brief.

When we reached the Commons news had gotten around that Chris Collins and his brother and sister went to school here. Girls were whispering and giggling as we passed by but none of them were brave enough to approach us.

Ky, Euriah, and Tank were all standing in our usual area by the trophy case near the west entrance.

"Yo! How was the beach?", Euriah asked as we all clasped hands.

"Sweet! I showed Chris the reef and we all had fun", I smiled.

"You took him to the reef? I thought you were going with your dad", Ashton approached us looking agitated.

"I was", I said the guilt making me sound like I was lying, but it wasn't like I had a reason to. Ashton and I weren't really together.

"Both of our families went together", Chris explained calmly stepping in for me.

Ashton looked disgusted, "Whatever". He looked ready to walk away but stood next to me and placed a hand on the small of my back while staring Chris down. It was all so territorial.

Chris looked around awkwardly before excusing himself. I couldn't escape the hurt look in his eyes or the fact that he tried to smile but it was just the slightest bit broken. My heart ached for him.

"I'll see you guys later", I said before jogging after Chris. I felt so bad. What was Ashton thinking? We're not together so why was he acting like he owned me all of a sudden.

I caught up to Chris easily, he wasn't walking very fast. "Hey what's wrong?", I asked placing a hand delicately on his arm. Maybe that was the wrong thing to do.

He flinched away from me. That hurt more than seeing him walk away just now. I felt rejected and stupid although it all happened in the blink of an eye. It was a heavy feeling. "Nothing. I'm just gonna get to class", he said refusing to look at me.

Was he upset with me? Why did I care? "Okay. See ya", I sounded more broken than I wanted to. Chris looked like he was going to say something but I walked away. This was definitely not the way I wanted to spend my first day back in this hell hole.

Everything had been going so well over break and now this. Chris and I had finally gotten over our awkward patch and now Ashton had to go and ruin it. I would definitely be talking to him later, but now I had to get too class.