A Different Type of Meeting

Chapter 20 - Feyre

Feyre

My face remained neutral when he asked me what I wanted, and I crept into his head, searching for what he was thinking about.
What did they do to poor, sweet innocent Feyre? This is a monster of the Night Court...but a monster who has information. But what does she want? Will it be worth it?
I left, now simmering with anger that was close to its boiling point. I shut it off, I shut it all off, and focused on my task. On what I came here to do.
"I want to go to that meeting, I want to be there." I said, and Lucien scoffed. I glared at him,
"You really think that we will give you a chance to communicate with the Night Court again? After everything that has happened this month?" He said. Was someone jealous that they wouldn't be getting all the attention anymore. I looked at Tamlin and smirked at his thoughts,
"I don't think the High Lord feels the same way, I think he think it was quite a reasonable request." I grinned like the cheshire cat at their shocked expression, it was almost comical. "So what do you say, do we have a deal?"Jurian leant back in his chair, obviously impartial to whatever decision was made, and Lucien was glaring at me intently.
"We do." Tamlin said, and motioned for me to take the seat beside Lucien. So I did, much to the dismay of the red-headed idiot.

We sat at that table for hours, me lying a lot, and them believing every cursed word of it. From the locations of army camps, to the 'deepest secrets' of the Night Court and its mysterious High Lord. Now I sat in that room I had given up so many weeks ago, and stared out the window that showed the rose gardens. That sickly sweet smell coated everything, from my now changed clothing, to the walls, it was all coated in that haunting scent. A knock sounded at the door, and my eyes snapped towards it.
"Knock knock." Jurian said, already entering the room. He closed the door behind him with a bang and I rolled by eyes.
"What the hell do you want, don't bother talking if you are just going to waste my time." I said, looking back out of my window.
"I have one question for you and then I will leave, why do you want to go to that meeting." Shit, I needed a reason. And fast. 
"I want a role in this, a role in the downfall of the Night Court. I want something in this dreaded world to live for." I said, my voice unwavering, because this time most of what I said was true. I wanted a role in this, I wanted something to live for, but it was a different Court that I wanted to see the downfall of. And I was sitting in the house of its High Lord. 
"Okay, then I have another proposition for you." He said, and I turned to him, my mask planted back on my face along with that cheshire cat grin.
"Go on then."
"This Court needs a Hybern emissary, who can keep an eye on the actions of the High Lord and his emissary. I'm offering you the role, I have other business to attend to."
"What does this role entail?" The trust he had already placed in me nearly flattered me, if it hadn't been placed in me by my enemy.
"Spying and lying, which you have recently proved you are good at during your time in the Night Court." He replied, and I hesitated before answering. I didn't know whether this would help or hinder my plan, but it was better to be safe than sorry. This was a game of trust and deceit. Deceit on my part, and misplaced trust on theirs. Lets just see how long it would last and who would be the loser.
"I'm in."
"Good. I leave tomorrow, I'll be back in one week for a full report, that is two days after the meeting." I turned back to the window as he vacated the room, and I felt the shadows in the room shift as another presence vacated the space. A presence I had least expected, but somehow knew would always find a way to be here, to prove to Rhysand once and for all that I was definitely on the other side. Because he hated me, and he probably always would until I told the truth for once in my life. 

I didn't sleep last night. I didn't even close my eyes. Nightmares plagued everything at night time, even when I was awake. Every second of last night had been spent in the bathroom on the brink of throwing up. Alis had arrived earlier in the morning than I had expected, and found me lying on the cool tiles of the bathroom sobbing. And the one thing she whispered in my ear after helping me get ready was,
"I sure hope your High Lord knows what you are doing for him." I was nearly certain she wasn't talking about Tamlin. 

Then I had walked downstairs to a formal farewell to Jurian, and I gave him a polite nod from the stairway. He nodded back, a silent conformation of what I was to do. If I even saw him again, I don't know what I would say, because I doubt I would be receiving any information from either Tamlin or Lucien, only I would be sharing. 

Nothing happened in the four days that followed until the meeting, only more days spent pouring over the map and planning what would happen at the meeting, and I ensured I would be able to speak. A subtle bit of probing seemed to do the trick. Now the day had arrived, however, and I was more nervous than I expected. I wore a dress of vibrant green silk, and a matching pair of shoes. But the one thing I still had left, was to dress how I wanted to. I needed to get a message across today, before Rhysand sent someone to kill me. Because I could feel his anger swelling as the days went on, and I could feel it pouring through the hand tattooed on my hand. I looked at myself in the mirror one more time, the dress, the shoes, the pearls, and the crown. The one thing that was not fit to be worn by the Spring Court Princess, but instead by the Nightmare of the Night Court.  A crown of entangled thorns, each gleaming from the black opal it was made from, with the speckles of diamonds like stars. A fractured galaxy. I left my room, knowing that Tamlin wouldn't like it, just like I wanted, because it would make him pissy for the meeting which was merely five minutes away. As I walked down that stairway into the foyer, I felt eyes drift to it, the one hint of darkness in a place otherwise drowned by the dreary pink of roses. Fitting, somehow, that the darkness always seemed to stick to me.
"Are you ready to go?" Tamlin asked, his voice courteous but taunt. Snappy. Great. I smiled politely at him and Lucien, who was also tagging along. 
"Of course." As we all winnowed into the home of Helion, High Lord of the Dawn Court.

We arrived to the glow of the marble that surrounded us. Made up the room that the meeting was being held in. And when we arrived there they all were, sitting in their chairs already, looking me up and down, much like they were doing to Tamlin and Lucien. That mask hovered over my face, and I noticed their eyes hovering over the crown balanced on my head. A message I hoped they understood. Because no other emotion was present in their eyes except for pure and concentrated anger. I was just glad Amren wasn't there, because I would already be dead.