state of grace ✦ leon goretzka

d r e i ß i g

fall

THE FUNERAL WAS QUICK though that couldn't be said for the way he died. The funeral was certainly not painless, neither was his death. The way he died was cruel- so cruel and so undeserved. No one deserved to die that way. He had fought for so long and the world was cruel because it gave him false hope after the first time around.

He was meant to grow old, get his Abitur, be a heartbreaker in college and then settle down in a nice little home with a lovely girl and eventually start a family. He was meant to leave Gelsenkirchen at 18 and find his place in the vast world because everyone knew he was destined for something greater than this town. He was meant to become the shining star of the family, because from the get-go, he had always shined brighter than Grace. He was meant to do everything his heart desired, and venture off as far as he pleased, but he would have always found his way back to the damned town because he bled royal blue and white.

He was meant to do everything; he was just meant to live.

Grace recounted all of this in her eulogy at his funeral. Her eyes were bone dry because she had shed such an incomprehensible amount of tears in the short days between his death and the funeral, but that didn't mean she wasn't ripping up inside with every breath she took. She wished she could take her breaths and breathe them into her brother, because he deserved life.

When she finished her eulogy, she bowed her head and stepped off the podium, tugging down the black garment that was her dress as she returned to her seat, right between her mother and father.

There wasn't too many at the funeral- just the Bauer's, the Lacroix's, the Goretzka's, his closest friends and their families and a few others. It was a small service for a grand boy.

Grace zoned out as someone made his speeches. It might've been a priest since they were mildly religious but Grace didn't really know- she didn't know much these days. All she knew was the lines on the palms of her hands as they glowed yellow in the sunlight rays.

For the past few days, it had been raining, as if the world was crying over the loss of him, but on his funeral, the sun shined brighter than ever, as if to apologise and make up for taking away more than it gave, but nothing could ever make up for that hole left in the hearts of everyone touched by Gale.

"Come here," Leon breathed to his girlfriend after they were getting ready to lower the casket 6 feet under. Grace had just returned from looking at the beautiful face of her precious brother for the final time before the casket was closed.

He had been dressed in a nice suit, but Grace knew he probably would rather have been buried in the royal blue shirt that was instead tucked beside his body. His lips were a disturbing shade of purple and his complexion all too pale. Grace expected his chest to rise and fall- no she needed this, but no matter how long she stared and willed it, Gale was dead.

"Leon," she hiccupped, collapsing into his arms. His grip was tight to ensure she didn't fall through, "Le."

"I know, baby, I know," he bit his lips as tears fell from the corners of his eyes, onto her platinum hair, "I know."

Gale passed two days after the match because his immune system just couldn't cope anymore and rejected the stem cell treatment that once upon a time, a year ago, worked. He became infected and he died after long hours of suffering. No matter how hard Grace clutched his hand and begged, Gale just couldn't hang on anymore. He died with his sister, father and mother in the room and they were a true family, no matter how broken they were.

In one hand, Leon was holding a blue rose, and he had taken the red rose out of Grace's grip as she would've crushed it against his chest. He didn't really know what to say- there were absolutely no words he could say to comfort her, because she had just lost her brother. It wasn't a plant or a pet, it was Gale- happy, optimistic and wonderful Gale. The boy had never known a life without Grace, and while Grace knew 6 years before him, she never imagined she would ever have to lead anymore years without the boy.