Beauty is the Beast || h.s. au

Chap. 14:

A/N: I apparently need to make this book short and fast so...

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 Did I know where I was going? No.

Did I care? No. But I'm sure I will later. The hurt I felt was surreal, it hurt more than when Liam left me, or should I say- when he accepted the deal.

I couldn't get it out of my head though, What deal were they talking about? What was the exchange of Liam's presence in their group? Was I a part of that deal? Well obviously. I look around and I find myself in a very familiar neighborhood. I guess my subconscious wants me to go back to my so-called mother and sister. I stared down the street and saw my house from there. It was getting dark and I didn't want to go back there just yet. So I turned on my heel and walked the house where I know I'll be accepted, even in this mess I am right now. And as much as it hurts me to go back there, I have to. It's the only welcoming choice I've got.

***

I gulped before knocking on the door three times, I waited and the door opened to reveal Anne, whose smile faltered when she saw my face. I probably look horrifying right now. "Oh My Gosh! What happened to you dear?" she asked as she ushered me inside. The welcoming warmth of the Styles' house was nice but I was still cautious to see if Harry's here. 

"Harry was worried sick about you! He came here and asked if we've seen you and then sped off somewhere else before we could even ask!" Anne explained. Harry worried about me? My chest started getting a pinching feeling, I'd probably say it was guilt. 

"Story time's later, we need to clean you up!" she announced, obviously flustered; Now I'm sure I feel guilty.After a bath and the clothes I thankfully left here, Gemma came into view as Anna asked how and where I had been. I wish she was my mom instead- but then Harry would be my brother... Never mind, I wish I had a mom just like her. I didn't exactly know how to tell her since I was never asked these kinds of question before but I'm thankful for my Book Club becoming useful right now. Gemma listened closely too, so when I was done- she dug in the pocket of her jeans and brought out my phone.

"W-Where'd you get that?" I thought I lost this thing! I'm pretty sure I didn't leave it here but bloody hell, How'd it get here?

"Harry handed it to me before he left, told me not to answer any of the calls or text messages" she said. Harry had it? He didn't even tell me? I guess he wanted me to look so stupid in front of him in the lads while I looked for the phone that he had. A growl escaped my mouth as a scowl deeply tugged on my face. I shook my head, I hate my life.

"I'm sorry for all the trouble that I've caused your household, I really am- but I'll be leaving tonight. Don't worry" I frown, defeated. Guess I can't stay here either, the feeling of guilt, betrayal, and defeat felt like stab in the chest and the back. I should never have been this competitive when it came to Liam, but I just couldn't help it- Competitive is my motto, my personality, me.

I bit my lip, I want to cry so bad.I'm not really good with speeches but I"m here to tell you that you are not the same girl we admired, Louis' voice echoed in my head.

That girl they admired wouldn't cry and give up just yet, even with no one to support her, she still had it going- and that's what I'm going to do.

"Are you sure love? You can still stay if you need to, We don't mind" Gemma frowned but I shook my head.

"I'll be fine, it'll all be over soon" I smile, they nod. 

"Just remember that there is always a space for you here in our household" Anna smiled, I nodded- it's hard to believe that this woman is Harry's mum. I adjust the strap of my bags on my shoulders and turn to Gemma to thank her for giving my phone back but she beats me to it. 

"Don't break my brothers heart" she says in monotone and I'm taken back. Me? Breaking Harry's heart? But then I remember why I started talking to him to start with. Guilt is mocking me and I almost apologize- almost. 

"Well, he beat me to it, because he broke mine" I spoke the truth. Of course, I was supposed to be the player here. But I took a wrong move into trusting him and having feelings for him, completely being an idiot and forgetting that he was what he was. I guess he was a better player than me. A flash of sympathy washed over her face before I smile and wave at them one last time and walking out there door. I close the door behind me and look up, but stop dead in my tracks when I see Harry there. Just gaping and staring at me. My eyes widen, I didn't know what to do. My heart was racing but my mind went blank. Memories hit me like truck of what had just happened an hour ago and I compose myself.

"I'm leaving" I try to say boldly but it comes out as a whisper. This seemed to snap him out of his daze, he shakes his head and attempts to come closer to me but I step back, even if the door was already there. 

"I-I'm sorry. I should've told you and-"

"It's my fault too, but tell me. Tell me what the deal was" I state firmly. I know it was about me, I just know it. It's quite obvious, I'm not called a nerd for nothing. He seemed to be weighing his options before sighing.

"Remember when we were assigned to be in that play together? Yeah, well- I talked to Liam just before lunch, he was my Music partner and well- he seemed like a good guy. I asked him how he could talk to you so easily and-"

"The deal Harry" I snap, his features hardened.

"Liam and I knew you were competitive so we made a deal that he joined us as a bait, we were friends by then so when he texted those things to make you jealous and you did the exact thing he said you would- I knew you were using me. But it was worth it" he steps closer to me until he's directly in front of me; His height towering over me.

"Every single thing you did was worth it, when you lost yourself in the canteen, it hurt to see you like that. Whenever I see you with Liam? I get this painful feeling in my chest because I'm jealous.So I have to suffer every single day for the past 2 years all because I want to see you happy. All because I fucking love you Lucy Emilia Gale. I'm so fucking in love with you" his voice cracking as he finished.

My lips parted, I love you too, my subconscious yelled. Did I? Over these times, he was the only person there. I didn't know what to say, I can see the uneasiness come over him, tears made his eyes glossy. It hurt me seeing him this way too, so I took my chances.

I kissed him.