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My Name Is Ace- Character Study

Okay I really wanted to write a quick Drabble/character study so imma post this here.
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My name is... Well, I don't really have a name. I'm not even an 'I' really.

We are one. She thinks for us, tells us what to do, and we do it. Change, shift, destroy, fix, whatever she says, goes.

I am one of many. We work, and we obey.

No thoughts, no taste of freedom. We are safe, and that's enough.

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My name is... I don't know. I'm nobody.

I'm so lost, I don't know where or who I am but all I know is pain.

They're talking- I can hear others talk, but it's so hard to focus. I don't understand, why am I alone? She's not in my head, what am I supposed to do? Nobody is telling me what to do, who even am I?

There's so much pain... Just of being alone at first but then outside pain. I get a taste of death but I push it away. I don't know why but I'm scared of it. But I'm not even alive, am I? I want to be alive.

But I just don't understand.

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My name is... I still don't know. But I can act now. They tell me what to do.

There's this darkness in my head. I can hear him in my head, talking. I don't have to think, he tells me what to do, and then it hurts when I don't do it. So I just do it, just like before, no questions asked.

He tells me to destroy and to hurt and to only look after myself. I do it. He tells me to watch. I do it. I watch the others.

I don't understand it though, they're all acting on their own. They think for themselves. How? How can they do this?

...I wonder what it's like.

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My name is... Ace? That's what they seem to call me.

The darkness still talks in my head but the more time I spend in physical bodies, the more I began to feel and... Think. It's so strange, to be able to think for yourself after a life of following someone else's directions.

And I'm beginning to feel that this darkness is bad. I destroy and I wonder why. I fight but I don't know what for. They call me a monster and it hurts. Why does it hurt?

I have to be alive. I can't stand only being able to stay in for short periods of time, I need to be alive. I need to know what it's like.

Freedom.

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My name is Ace. I've accepted this name.

I've made myself a body and it's... Interesting to say the least. Humans are so fragile and now I'm one of them.

I need to eat, sleep, everything... It's exhausting honestly, but... I can feel. So many bad emotions, but good ones too. I tried good food for the first time today and I've never felt happier.

The darkness is quieter than ever before, and I can think. I have to think on my own so much of the time now, nobody is telling me what to do. Freedom is so strange. I feel so unsafe and yet, lighter. Like I can fly. Which makes no sense but it's strange to think about.

I met a young boy today. He didn't run away. He made me think more than anyone else ever did. He never looked afraid. He never called me a monster or abomination, things even I have called myself.

I don't understand.

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My name is Ace and I'm in too deep.

I can't go back on anything now. The darkness invaded my head, I've tried to stop it but it's no use. I've been taught to accept, it doesn't hurt as much when I do.

The boy's name is Chester. He hasn't stopped visiting. Each time he only makes me think more, and he's still never called me a monster or abomination. Not even in his eyes. He's seen me at my worst but he wasn't scared for his life, he was scared for mine. He looked so sad.

I can't go back and make sure he doesn't get attached to me. I can't go back and fix my mistakes. I can't change who I am.

I'm in way too deep.

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My name is Ace. That's one of the few things I have left.

I don't know who I am really. Everything is so confusing and twisty and it feels like my head is on fire and yet ice cold at the same time, burning with both fire and ice.

I can't go back now. I've tasted freedom and now even if someone or something is inside my head, I can't just follow without questioning.

Some are trying to fix me, I don't think it's working really. I don't think I can go back to the way I was with just a snap of a finger, or any other methods for that matter.

I don't know what's going to happen.

My name is Ace. I keep telling myself this so I can remember who I am.

My name is Ace. The accident. The monster. The abomination.

My name is Ace. I'm his friend. His most trusted. His... Hero.

My name is Ace. In the end, all of this is what defines me.

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*Throws confetti* Yayyyyy

I wanted to go into detail of how Ace started out to how he is now. I dunno, I just kinda went with it. Kinda Poem-y?

Anyways, hopefully this was at least somewhat good. Be sure to comment whatever the heck you made of this, and goodbye!

—JustAnAtlantisWriter