First And Last

Chapter 17

Kaycee's POV

Well, I'm back to tapping my pencil on the desk, waiting for my last period of the day. I know Jessica showed up today, because she ignored me as she walked past my class earlier. I can't blame her for being mad and I went a little overboard on my jealousy as well. She was right, I was being stupid. I wish I had an excuse, but I don't, because I've never actually felt that level of jealousy before.

Jessica really got under my skin like no other and this is killing me. I messed up big time. This girl has been through hell, yet she still kept her heart and gave me a small piece of it, just so I could take it for granted. She's never going to take me back and I deserve it.

The minutes moved like hours and my stomach did flips as the bell rang, signaling the end of this period and welcoming my last one of the day. I stood nervously at my door and watched for Jessica like I always do, and my stomach did a flip when she finally came into view.

She was laughing at something Stephanie said, which is a good sign, right? I kept an indifferent expression on my face, but inside I was screaming. Stephanie gave me a weird look and actually said good morning to me and Jessica didn't even make eye contact with me on her way into the classroom. I just grit my teeth and welcomed my other students until the second bell rang. What else could I do?

I felt like a child standing in front of my last class of the day, trying to remember the lesson plan I had laid out for them. I couldn't concentrate with Jessica so close, yet a million miles away, so I gave up and let them work in pairs instead.

Jessica paired up with Stephanie, of course, so I sat at my desk and worked on some assignments to keep my mind off of them sitting so close together. Every now and then, I would sneak a peek at them, but I kept to myself otherwise.

When it was time for my students to leave for the day, I stood by my desk and wished them a good evening. Stephanie returned my sentiment, but Jessica just nodded and hurried to the door.

I can't bear this. I should be relieved that I will have no reason to get caught now, but I'm not. I still want her. The next few days, I left small notes on her assignments. Just one liners, saying, 'I'm sorry' or 'You're beautiful'. I didn't want to come off too aggressive, but also, she still seemed angry, or hurt maybe.

I've noticed that Jessica has become much closer to Stephanie lately. I try not to let my irrational jealousy take over because of that, but it's no use. I've also noticed that Stephanie will give me sad looks sometimes. I wonder if Jessica told her about us.

...................

Friday finally got here and I let out a breath of relief when the end of day bell rang. Stephanie was acting weird on her way out. She stopped Jessica from leaving, then dropped her bag, spilling all of her stuff out of it. Jessica knelt down to help her and so did I, then Stephanie jumped up and ran to the door.

"What are you doing?" I asked Stephanie as I shoved her books into her bag.

"Both of you have been moping around all week and I'm sick of it." Stephanie pointed at me and said, "You fucked up and you need to apologize to her face and show her the stupid card, so she doesn't think you cheated on her." Then she pointed at Jessica, "And you, need to stop being so bullheaded. Not everyone is going to leave and hurt you. Ms. Garrett obviously cares about you and you care about her. You both look like shit and it's time to grow the fuck up and talk to each other like adults. Now, I'm going to stand outside this door and neither of you are leaving until you've kissed and made up. I miss my friend and I miss my teacher. Fix this."

With that, Stephanie opened the door and walked out. Jessica jumped up and started to run to the door, but I stopped her.

"She's right, Jessica. Please, can we fix this? I'll do anything." I said, softly.

"Did you sleep with him?" Jessica whispered.

"No. I would never." I whispered back.

"Why wouldn't you just show me the card and why didn't you tell me that night, when he showed up?" She asked.

"You can read the card. He says he misses and loves me in it and I didn't think you needed to see that. I thought I was protecting you, but I see now, that I only hurt you by hiding these things. If you give me another chance, I promise to do better. I will be better. I only want you, Jessica. No one else." I promised.

Jessica noticeably gulped, then looked down at her feet. She seemed to be wrestling with herself internally, so I stayed perfectly still as she came to her decision.

When she finally looked back up, her eyes were watery and she said with a  crackle, "Ok."

I stepped forward cautiously. "Ok?"

She nodded her head. "Ok. Let's try again. I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have run away and we should have talked this out like adults in the beginning. I was childish, but I promise to do better as well. No more secrets, yeah?"

"No more secrets." I whispered, then closed the distance between us and pulled her into a tight hug.

She felt like home. With her in my arms again, all the pieces of me that were shattered, started healing themselves and I began to feel whole once more. I knew right then, that I could probably never be without her.

I felt her sigh into my neck and she seemed relieved as well, then she started placing small kisses on my neck and down my jaw. She kissed my chin, then stared at my lips, so I took the initiative and pressed my lips to hers.

This kiss, was my favourite. It was soft and sweet, but a million, silent words passed between us in that kiss. I knew this would forever change our relationship, as it shifted into something a lot more serious and my heart swelled for it.

I was the one to pull away first and I whispered, "I want to be able to call you mine and I want to be yours...exclusively. What do you think?"

Jessica nodded, then said, "I want the same."

I smiled, then gave her another kiss, before linking our hands together. "You told Stephanie."

Jessica shrugged, "She kind of figured it out on her own, but she won't say anything. I mean, it's obvious that she supports us or whatever. Are you mad?"

I squeezed her hands, then said, "Not at all. I would tell the world if I could."

After making out for a bit, we decided to give Stephanie a break and knocked on the door.  She opened it, then stepped inside.

"Are you both done being stupid?" Stephanie asked with a hint of amusement in her eyes.

I looked at Jessica and she smiled at me, then nodded. I took her hand in mine, then said to Stephanie, "Yes ma'am."

Stephanie laughed, then moved past us to get her bag and said, "Good and look, I want you both to know that I won't say anything to anyone, even if it doesn't work out. I just want you to be happy and if that's with each other, then it's nobody's business. I swear it to you both. Ok?"

I thanked her up and down, but Stephanie shrugged me off and joked that she's jeopardizing her own relationship to fix ours because she's late to meet her boyfriend, then bumped me on the way out the door.

I was wrong about Stephanie and I'm glad for it. Now, time to make it up to...my girlfriend? Yes. My girlfriend.