Saving the Mafia Boss (BOOK 2)

CHAPTER 27

"Please, princess. Stop crying." At his words the last of my strength leaves me. I'm not okay with this, any of it. No matter how much I think it over, how much I try to act like I'm fine, I'm not. I feel him pick me up before sitting down with me on his lap and his arms around me.

"Alright, I get it. Everything will be okay. Shhh. I'm here. Let it out." He whispers a few words every now and then as he strokes my hair. I don't know how long he holds me but I eventually stop. My face feels hot and my eyes feel puffy.

"I'm sorry Nico."

"Don't be sorry, you've had to be strong your whole life. It's fine to break a few times. Now, you have a lot of people to support you. Never forget that you can come to me whenever you feel like you need someone. And please, no more lying from now on. I'm proud of you for trying to be tough but you're still human. At least, trust in me. Please."

"Thank you. But that isn't what I'm apologizing for."

"Oh?"

"I mean, I'm sorry for you always having to be there to comfort me. You have enough to deal with, not adding the nineteen year old crybaby."

"You're not a crybaby. All your life you've been controlled. Now you can be free, that includes being free to express your feelings. And never apologize for trusting in me. You have no idea how happy it makes me to know that you come to me for comfort, that you trust me so much and that I can be the person who supports you. It's far from a burden."

He adjusts the strands of hair that made their way to my face. I look up at him as he runs his thumb across my cheek while cupping my face. His hands are like Alessandro's, rough from their hard lives but still extremely gentle. I feel my heart racing and before I can register what I'm doing I move my face closer to Nicholas and he looks surprised before I close the distance. He hesitates like the gentleman he is before putting his hand in my hair and holding me closer to him and deepening the kiss. I should feel bad about this and I do but the comfort it brings me is what I need right now. I shouldn't do this to either of them, betray Ale or give Nico any false hope but I push away all rational thoughts and focus on the warmth coursing through my body. I feel safe if only for now, I feel like everything will be just fine. Still, after a while I pull back as I realize that I feel many things except what Ale makes me feel. Nicholas is warmth and comfort, Alessandro is home.

"I'm sorry, Nico. I-" He shakes his head before smiling.

"Don't apologize. I know you're confused right now, in any case I should be apologizing. I'm a little selfish sometimes and I can't say I didn't enjoy every second of it. It's on me. I'm a grown man and I know what I'm doing. Don't worry about me." He's still smiling and I can see the genuine happiness on his face. Why does he have to be so understanding? No matter what I do he's still there for me. I don't deserve him.

"Thank you for understanding." He nods in response.

"Yeah, but we should make sure this doesn't happen again. As much as I would love it, we can't betray Alex that way and you also don't need more confusion in your life. I'm here for you, I care for you, I'm your friend and that won't change."

"I don't deserve you Nicholas."

"You're right you know?" I'm a little taken aback by his honesty.

"You don't deserve me or Alex for that matter. You deserve much more, you deserve the world. You deserve a normal life, not a life full of danger and worry." Of course he would say something like that.

"Thank you, Nico."

"Do you want to wait for dinner? Or are you too tired?"

"I'm not really hungry."