Butterfly [MIN YOONGI]

Chapter 4 - Pain

As he step further into the building in front of him,along together with everyone but why did if feel like he was walking alone,like nobody was here,it's just him.Yoongi look around to find everyone in pair.It's just him,left alone here.And that thoughts really sting his feeling even though he understand he doesn't deserve all of them.Suddenly,a feeling of rush and want to vomit building in his body.Yoongi suddenly hold the chair beside him to support his body as he start to feel dizzy.

'No,please stay strong.Please,don't fall.Don't let them see you weak.They won't never ever care and you know it.So,please don't be sick.You will be fine.' Yoongi mentally motivated himself but his body seems not responding positively as his eyes start to get dark and white.

"Excuse me,may I go to the toilet?" Yoongi build up his left over energy to talk to one of the girl he believe is a backstage staff.

"Sure..Oh my God!Are you ok?Why you look so pale?" Suddenly the girl said surprised with how Yoongi face look pale and tired.

"I'll be fine.Don't worry." Yoongi said as he run away from the room as he heard someone call his name and he believe that person is one of their caring members Jimin.

After Yoongi disappear,Jimin was left there dumbfounded and worrying.He walk back to the other and the older notice worries in his eyes.

"Jiminie,is everything alright?" Jin ask notice something was off.

"Hyung,did everyone notice how strange Yoongi hyung behaviour nowadays?" Jimin said and everyone just can afford to look at each other face as everyone agree that is true.

"I notice it too,it had been long time since I saw him eat any proper meal too actually.I tried to ask him but he just keep saying he was full or busy." Hoseok say remembering the times he ask Yoongi about his eating habits and he just keep avoiding that topic.

"He also,had been avoiding me in room." Suddenly everyone attention turn to Jungkook as he sound sad.

"Didn't you try to talk to him maknae?Maybe he is facing some problems?" Namjoon ask.

"I tried.But somehow Yoongi hyung keep trying to,keep being cold to me.I don't know why.I keep thinking maybe I have hurt him in anyway but I don't think so,I don't know anymore." Jungkook said sighed out heavily.

"I'm sorry to disturb your discussion,but can any one of you go and check out on Yoongi?He doesn't look well just now.I'm just worried." Suddenly a girl came and talk but look hesitated to say it.Everyone look at each other before Jin voice out.

"Let me go." Everyone nodded and Jin left the room walking to the toilet with mind full of scary thoughts and worrying about this younger boy behaviour.

'What is happening to you Yoongi?' He thought then run fast toward the toilet and swing open the door and look at Yoongi who is look shocked that someone suddenly enter the toilet with his face look like a mess.

"Yoongi,are you ok?" Jin ask as Yoongi face was full with tears and his hand was hardly grabbing the sink supporting himself.Yoongi quickly turn away and quickly wash his face as Jin walk closer to him slowly.As Jin caress his back,Yoongi suddenly move away toward the wall and shocked Jin even himself.Yoongi eyes was popping out as his hand was at his chest level making a gesture to not come closer as his body shaking wild.

"Yoongi,what's wrong?Are you sick?Let hyung see it." Jin ask starting to worry instead of angry.

"No,just stay away from me!" Yoongi shout then run panically as Jin was trying to hold his hand and stop him but,successfully he survived to run out from the toilet.

'Hyung,I'm sorry.I'm really sorry.Please don't care about me.Please leave me alone.I don't want to burden the group anymore.I don't want anyone to know I'm sick.I don't want to mess the group schedule anymore.I will endure this alone.So please,don't comfort me and saying being sick is alright because it's not!As an idol,being sick is a weaknesses.' Yoongi thoughts as he run into the dressing room and everyone look at him with questionable face as Yoongi walk into the room like he was running from something scary.

"Yoon.." Namjoon got cut off as Yoongi excuse himself.

"Sorry,I'll go get change." He said feeling down as he realize everyone was already in their attire and ready to perform,while he?He let his depression and anxiety attack stop him and make him slow which effect the whole group.He feel like having depression and anxiety along with eating disorder,he is burdening the whole group.

As Yoongi walk away,few minutes later,Jin came into the room and all the remaining members stand up and quickly walk toward him curious on what happen to both of them that make Yoongi arrived here completely in fear.

"He just run away as I was trying to ask what happen.He look like he was in fear with something." Jin said seriously worry.

Everyone just sighed out heavily as Yoongi behaviour that like to keep his heart door closed and prohibited for anyone to know it,make everything hard.When Yoongi,on the other side thought if he bottle everything up,everyone will be happy.

"Let's put this aside for a while ok?We will all figure this out later with Yoongi.Now focus on performing ok?" Namjoon said reminding everyone for their performance and the other nodded and try to jokes with each other to forget the worries.But,Jin walk secretly to Namjoon and tap his shoulder.

"Namjoon,I don't think Yoongi is in a good health,he won't be able to perform well." Jin said and Namjoon look shocked.

"You are saying you scared Yoongi will mess up the performance?" He ask unbelievable.

"I'm scared he will fall sick Namjoon.He clearly doesn't look well.I don't care about the stage,the members health is way more important.I don't want any of them fall sick or fainted." Jin said look serious.

~TO BE CONTINUE~
💮 Author notes : Well,I always tried my best to hide the facts that I'm in pain or something.I get sick a lots until people didn't believe it lol I know it's weird.I'm really weak I know.I have anemic problems but people said I always get sick too much until I fainted a lots if I didn't get enough sleep.People said having anemic doesn't mean you are gonna die.Well,I know that.Maybe there is another reasons why I keep getting sick I guess?Btw as always,I love you bae to whoever beautiful people that is reading this! 💮