"dan, you wanna go out and watch a movie tonight?" phil asked, head turning towards dan, heart clenching as he saw the smaller boy wrapped in a blanket on the couch. he awed inside his head. wanting nothing more than to scoop dan up in his arms and spin him around. take him far away from the lives they had created for themselves. the toxic air that surrounded them was getting too hard to breathe.
"hm, sure." dan replied softly. glistening eyes glued to the screen as he watched the notebook. he could feel phil's stare on him. you always could. phil had a certain aura about him. that's probably what made dan so attached. he was so magnetic. he was absolutely enticing. pulling you in before you could start breathing. he was like a siren on a dark night, his blue eyes the only shining thing through the dark night.
phil sighed, admiring dan for a couple more seconds. letting his eyes fall away from him. he was so, so, utterly in love with him. and it scared him so much. it scared him, how much he was in love with this boy. that he was so attached, that he was so clingy. he was so afraid, he had never had feelings like this before. and he didn't think he would ever again.
but he was too afraid of being broken hearted, so he decided that evelyn was his only option. his lifeline in the thrashing waters that was loving dan howell. maybe he should've seen it sooner, or gotten out quicker.
maybe he shouldn't have fallen in love with dan howell.
