The Catalyst (GirlXGirl)

Chp. 57 "Unexpected Call"

I closed my eyes, fighting with myself internally and becoming exhausted from all the rage I had been trying to control. I sat on the ledge of the Bureau, looking over the vast area that extended in every direction from the Bureau. What was I going to do? And how was I going to deal with this situation?

Avery had kept something vital from me, and now I didn’t even know if I could trust her anymore.

I knew I should’ve stayed to let her explain but I just couldn’t, I would’ve ended up hurting her, or worse killing her. If she was a Snitch for the F.P.S., was it possible that she was the one that set up the spy that was outside Teal’s house the day we went to Louisiana? And was she the one that helped that guy locate me that night we had went to meet Roger to help him kill me?

Did she lie to me just to do a job?

I remembered how I she hadn’t told me about her brother Chris, and how I had felt so betrayed by her. Was he involved with the government too? I mean he was an American Soldier, he had to be involved.

She had played me from day one, because when she found out who I really was she ratted me out to her dad. She was the one that helped the Feds locate me, and she was the traitor.

The feeling I had was unexplainable, and I was literally hurting on the inside. I wanted to die now, because I was in love with this girl, and I was now convinced she only did what she did to make her father happy.

She was just doing her job.

The more I tried to be furious at her, the more difficult I found it because even though I was sure she was the one behind everything, I couldn’t help but give her the benefit of the doubt. I hadn’t given her the chance to explain herself, but right now I really didn’t want to. I just wanted to be alone and think about everything I had to decide.

I held my head in my hands, trying to understand why Avery would do something like this to me. Why would she lie to me? Why would she hide something so important like that from me?

Did she even love me?

I knew I should’ve been concerned about the bigger picture, but I wasn’t as concerned about her ratting me and my powers out to the government. I was actually more worried about if our relationship was a complete lie. I knew it was because I loved the girl, but did she love me the same?  Was everything she told me a lie? Or was it true? Or was she lying the entire time just to gain my trust?

I gripped my dog-tag that hung around my neck since the day my mom gave it to me. I squeezed, hoping for some of the pain to go away, but none did. I hung my head in shame, wondering how I could’ve been so stupid to think I could trust Avery. Someone I had barely known when I let her into my personal life.

At least I had known Max was like me and not a traitor.

I wanted to cry, I really did, just so I could find a sense of release, but I knew I couldn’t. I didn’t want to cry, and I didn’t want to be weak. I needed to learn to be strong and deal with situations like this. I needed to stand up and fight, and that’s exactly what I was going to do. I didn’t want to see Avery right now. I wanted to keep my distance because I was afraid if I saw her I would hurt her.