Brown Eyed Boy

Almost But Not Quite (Jessie POV)

Cassie was sprawled across my living room floor watching one of my old DVDs when my doorbell rang sometime around four. She didn't even look away from the screen as I got up from my couch to answer the door. I was ready to find Carlos at my door but what I wasn't ready for was the purple blue bruise swelling up his left cheek. My eyes widened at the sight and he looked at me quickly before ducking his head down. I grabbed hold of his wrist, pulling him inside and closed the door behind him. He looked up at me as I pulled him but I didn't stop until we were in my kitchen. “Sit,” I said as I pointed to the chair in the corner. Walking over to the refrigerator, I grabbed the kitchen towel from the counter and wrapped some ice from the freezer in it.

“Jessie, I'm fine,” Carlos said as I walked over to him. Ignoring him and not really registering what I was doing, I gently took hold of his face and placed the ice filled towel on his swollen cheek. He winced and I didn't know if it was from the cold or if I pressed too hard.

“Sorry,” I said softly.

“It's fine,” he said back. I met his eyes only briefly before focusing back on the towel. I couldn't see the bruise underneath it, but I didn't want to look him in the eyes again. I had realized how close I was to him and I was showing a lot more emotion than usual. “Jessie, really. I'm fine. You don't have to do that.” I ignored him again and he sighed. “Jess.” His hand came up and wrapped around my wrist gently causing a shiver to run through me, but in a good way. I hesitated before meeting his eyes and instantly wished I hadn't. His brown eyes were warmer than I had ever seen them, filled with emotions I wish I could understand but made me nervous. My breath caught at his touch and I froze under his gaze, unsure of what would happen next.

After a minute, he finally spoke and I breathed out again. “Jess, I said I'm fine.” Before I could respond, I noticed his knuckles looked red and raw. Looking at them, I had a flashback to the emptiness in his eyes as he fought and the shiver I felt again was of fear. I took an involuntary step back and used my free hand to remove his from my wrist and place it on the towel.

“Hold that,” I said and turned away from him, back to the refrigerator. I opened the door and just stared inside for a few minutes, letting the cold air slap into me and push away the fear. Then I grabbed two sodas, closed the door and turned around almost slamming into Carlos. I leaned back on the fridge and stared at Carlos as he watched me and took the sodas from my hand, moving them to the counter.

“Sorry for scaring you,” he said quietly. I tried to avoid looking at his face, but the dark bruise seemed to scream at me like a neon light.

“You didn't scare me,” I said. “I just didn't hear you get up.”

Carlos closed his eyes and sighed before responding. “I didn't mean now,” he said as he opened his eyes to look at me. “I meant before, at school.”

“Oh.” It was all I could say because anything else would be a lie and I hated the thought of lying to him. And even more than that, I hated the look in his eyes because it was the same one I gave him all the time. The look that said he was afraid he pushed me too far and was waiting for me to leave. “It's okay.”

“No, it's not,” Carlos said. “I saw how scared you were and I didn't like that I was the one that made you feel that way. I really don't even know what happened. It was like I blacked out or something.” I just nodded at his words, unsure of what I was supposed to say. I wanted to tell him that wasn't true. Yet at the same time I thought it was because the person standing in front of me now seemed nothing like the person in the fight earlier. “I'm really sorry, Jessie.”

“I know you are,” I answered. “Really Carlos, it's okay. You were just trying to help me and got a little carried away that's all. It's no big deal.”