A person's personality doesn't truly show what they are inside, nor their looks can show their true powers, I found out after joining a certain group filled with mysteries and secrets.
Started on: Thursday, July 13th 2017
Ended on: Monday, December...
I started to feel hatred and need of revenge, to break bones, full of myself, saying that I'm the best. I took a glance at Frederick after seconds of change of emotions. It was quiet but dangerous, I could tell. I could feel the tension between the two but none of them are willing to take the first move. I could see that Frederick was in mental pain right now, in need of a hug and whisper of soothing and encouraging words in his ear. While Chris, on the other hand, was impatient to ruin him, to break all his bones and to send him to afterlife. It was clear that I was worried of the things that will happen next if I leave them as I eas only here to check out Frederick's condition, somehow ended up feeling Chris' too.
"You know, I've always wanted to know how it feels to have such an ability," Chris spoke and got my attention, "Empath, empathy, empathic, empathize; in you." He pointed his finger at me. "You're now surprised that I know about your secret but is hiding it, aren't you?"
I shook my head. "Not at all. I have expected that this ability won't be able to be kept a secret for any longer." After turning on Frederick's in-ear, I continued, "Say, Chris, is it you who's the puppeteer?"
"Empath! The only person in this world who can feel one's emotions bu a single touch!" He ignored my question and shouted. "How rare you are! But your family doesn't accept you, you have to cover your skin not to let yourself stealing people's emotions so carelessly. How pitiful!"
He was mocking me so freely. I tried to hold back my anger because even if I let it out loud, I have no reason to fight because it was facts he was stating.
Empathy is the key to humanity. It lets you to feel humans' sadness and joy, fear and excitement, bravery and pity; those emotions make you human, I wanted to say. This isn't an ability, it's human nature that is supposed to be held by every human with a pulse on Earth, therefore those who are not able to feel empathic to each other are not human.
I tightened the hold my own palms, gritting my teeth trying not to spill all my thoughts onto his face.
"That's enough, Carrick." Frederick's sudden warning startled me and I looked at him in disbelief. "You can go now. You're only here to check out my feelings, aren't you? You already did that. You should go."
"But-but what you're feeling is absurd!" I almost yelled at him. "You don't have exact feelings, you don't want to have emotions, you're tired of having feelings especially after having a discussion with him here! That's why you were quiet even after I got here, because you believed in the words he said but in reality they're all lies. Wake up, Frederick! This is a critical situation we're facing, everyone is fighting with their mentalities now, too. You can't be the only one drowned in negativity and doubt of your own power!"
I looked at Chris with anger and hatred but said nothing after I finished throwing all my opinions on Frederick who couldn't say a thing and yet I couldn't read his expression. One thing I was sure of is that he's still trying to release himself from the cage Chris managed to get him in.
"Ha! You can't be so sure about your own words, because I've been feeding Frederick with lies until now," Frederick isn't that easy, "He believes me, not you. As long as you're not touching him, you don't understand one's feeling a bit! You're just a let-down to the squad and you're burdening them with your happy-virus ass. In fact you just don't want to feel their sadness and stress so you do your best to cheer them up. You're just benefiting yourself, not others!"
...It's not like that.
He was wrong.
So wrong.
I'm not a let-down.
"WHAT'S THE MATTER MAKING PEOPLE HAPPY?!"
My anger caught me off-guard that I couldn't hold it anymore. I let it all out, speaking each word with growls through gritted teeth and my expression was only one of despise and hatred, staring at Chris dead angry.
"I'm not as weak as you think. I AM A MEMBER BECAUSE OF THIS ABILITY! You're such a big mouth yet you don't know a single thing about human feelings so you better shut the fuck up! You talk big but it was all N-O-N-S-E-N-S-E. I don't know what the fuck happened to you in the past that you have to cause all this, be it out of revenge or foolish unhealthy entertainment for you and dirty men," dang, "I believe that something tragic happened in your past that you became like this right. I believe that you weren't like this because you still have a heart and emotions. Whatever you're feeling right now, it makes you human. I want to change you. I want to end all of this nonsense you caused without any harm. Chris, why won't you call it a day and give up on this?"
I came to the realization that I started to cry, the corners of my eyes started to get wet from puddle of tears forming. I realized, that Frederick was holding my hand all along so I was basically saying his feelings into words to the replacement teacher in front of us. It was his words I was shouting, why didn't I realize it sooner? Was I that lost-control to notice the little physical contact he gave me?
"This is..." I started again. I was honestly relieved that he spoke, although in his own ways. It means he's not in a mental breakdown anymore. He spoke through me words of peace to lighten someone's dark heart.
Chris didn't show any expression on his face while my mood was suddenly lightened up, smiling widely while looking at the man full of confidence and satisfaction.
Yes, this is it, I thought.
I am Empath.
=================
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Add me on: Instagram: c._nathania (new), nathannia.cs (old) Twitter: NathanniaCS Google+: Nathania 娜大雅
