Fell in the Forest ( A Dear Evan Hansen Fan Fic )

Ch 1- The Importance of Jumping and Falling

He looks up at the tall tree, breathing in the scent of the pine. Trees are wonderful things. They help you breathe, he thinks as he grabs and branch and tests it out to see if it will hold his weight. It does, and he jumps up, grabbing the next one and sitting on it. He keeps climbing higher and higher until the entire sun shines on his face. He closes his eyes, savoring the last time he'll ever feel the sun. Or anything, for that matter.

He's felt only terrible things for so long and he can't take it anymore. What with all the teasing and the anxiety that makes speaking impossible and no friends to make it better, it's all too much.

It has to end now.

Evan opens his eyes and takes a breath, scooting over to near the end of the branch. This tree is very tall and very old. If you were to chop it down (which isn't very nice and would kill the tree, which you shouldn't do) and count all the rings, you could tell how old it was. Each year as it grows, it makes a new ring. Evan guesses it must be 150 years old, maybe more.

Quit thinking about trees and just jump.

It'll be better that way.

The voices in his head start speaking.

No one needs you.

No one will notice.

No one wants you around.

It'll be better for you, better for everyone.

Evan starts to look down but snaps his eyes shut.

Don't look down, don't look down, just jump. Don't look down-

"Hey, you!"

-don't look down. Jump. NOW!

"What's going on up there?"

Someone's looking at him, which makes Evan nervous. He was hoping that, in this abandoned orchard, no one would be there. He wanted to be alone when he died, just like he felt when he was alive.

But of course the universe couldn't even grant him that request.

"Do you want me to come up there?" Evan shook his head. He just wanted to be alone. "Well, that's too bad, do you want to know why?" He continued without a response from Evan. "Because I hate doing what people tell me."

Evan feels the tree begin to shake and holds on to the branch tightly.

Why Evan? You want to die. Why not just let go? It would save you the trouble of having to jump off yourself... Pathetic. You can't even do-

"Wow. Nice view up here." Evan flinches at the closeness of the voice. "Sorry, dude. Didn't mean to scare you."

Evan still won't open his eyes, but from this close he sounds very familiar. "So. What are you doing up here? There's other places to go if you wanted to watch the sunset, you know?" Evan doesn't say anything.

But now there's silence. You have to say something, because what if he thinks you're mute? If you don't say something now and he keeps talking, what if you want to say something later? Then he'll be confused because you weren't talking before, but now you are and that'll require more of an explanation which would mean more taking and you'd probably stutter and he'd make fun of you which you don't want to happen.

"I...I-I just...."

Evan glances over and sees someone who looks kinda like a girl wearing a black hoodie and dark jeans with long brown flowing hair covering her face. Evan can't see who she is. But her voice sounded so deep...?