Who Even Cares [Bio Book]

129. triggers

first off, it happened

i met another person named hayley and it's spelled the same way

shocker

aNYWAY

i said last monday that i was going to the doctor and that i'd write about it but i never did. so just to really quickly clarify

IT SUCKED.

so we got in there and the entire room smelled of rubbing alcohol and latex. it was SO creepy.

my mom goes and fills out paperwork and i go and sit down. and i felt like everyone was staring at me. literally everyone. it was most likely my triggers messing with me but i felt so uncomfortable.

after what felt like an hour i finally got called into the back. now turns out this wasn't an actual doctors office where you go to the nurses station and then an exam room, it was actually one of those urgent care places.

BUT IT WAS STILL REALLY CREEPY.

so the nurse does her triggering nurse shit with me and then we wait. and we wait. and i watch my mom save baby pandas on this game on her phone. that was.... interesting.

so after awhile, this doctor guy walks in.

WELL.....

he wasn't actually a doctor. he was in training to become a doctor lmfao good job

he actually wasn't horrible. but nonetheless he's a doctor and my iatrophobia tends to seep through. my only real issue with him other than the fact he's a doctor was this:

so when he walked in, he looked at me and was like "wow, you're looking pretty miserable. are you okay?"

WELL NO SHIT SHERLOCK

no, i'm not okay. there's a reason i'm at URGENT CARE of all places.

but again, he's a doctor. anyway, after that, they wanted to shove something down my throat to test for strep throat. so we had to wait for the nurse practitioner to come in. (how many different people were there??)

now this shit really shook my ass. listen close.

so we were waiting for the nurse practitioner and there are these three girls in for physicals. now, why they'd go to urgent care for that is beyond me. urgent care is for people who are sick. go see your doctor lmao

(that's obviously easier said than done)

anyway, one of them was in the bathroom and idk exactly what was going on because i was only eavesdropping but the nurse wanted a jar of piss and she was like "after you go, don't do anything. just give it to me and then and ONLY then will you be allowed to flush the toilet and wash your hands"

bitch

that shit is nasty

and my mom and i looked at each other with big eyes and we were both like "EWWWWFNFNJJDKJRFJFJH" because honestly what normal person wouldn't find that gross

and that was about it, except when the nurse practitioner came in she decided that my symptoms were obvious af and that they didn't need to shove anything down my throat

also my mom and i argued over needles again and she tried to tell me that she has a deathly fear of needles herself

lmfao mom if you were really afraid of needles you wouldn't tell me to just shut up and take it or that i'm faking the fear or any of the other fucking bullshit you spew when it comes to me and my trypanophobia

she doesn't really know about my iatrophobia tbh. i'm grateful cause she and my dad would find a way to invalidate that as well (my dad vaguely knows about it and he told me to "just wait till you have to see a woman doctor") what the fck dad

now if you'll excuse me i'm just gonna go be mega triggered

9-18-17