A Promise From My Heart

49.

Ten days later, my dad was yet to give an answer. He went on with his day-to-day activities like Amir's family never came. Each day brought a higher level of agitation for me. Not only me, even my siblings and Amir. What's taking him so long? Does he not like Amir? Or was it his family? I brought home a man for the first time and he wants to reject him. There was a rise of annoyance at his delay and quietness.

I don't like Abdulsamad. I had told Abdulsamad and my father. My father had been understanding. Abdulsamad had expressed his hurt but was also understanding. Then what's taking time? Does he think Amir and I won't be good together? Amir won't be good for me? Is it the distance? Letting me go that far away? If it was for education, would he not have let me go? Arrrgghh! I wanted to pull at my hair.

"Maybe your father does not want us to be together." Amir had said over the phone one day.

"What? Hell no! I don't think so." I disagreed with vigour. The fear sitting at the bottom of other emotions wormed in. It was the fear of not being with Amir, the fear of having to free him and the fear of my father refusing. It was the first time I had given love a chance and it wanted to play me dirty. Ah! This life no get balance!

"If we do not end up together," if? Where's the if coming from? Amir Hussein Mashood, are you giving up on us? "I would appreciate that I found love, understood what love is and was loved in return."

My heart raced with dread at each word he uttered. What rubbish is this guy saying? He and who won't end up together? "Stop speaking this way. We're going to get married."

"You know that is a probability, right? If you do not have your father's consent? I won't want to marry you without his consent and blessing."

"As much as I love that my father's blessing means a lot to you, to us having a life together, I don't like the sound of us of not ending up together. Amir Hussein Mashood!" I barked into the phone. "So, you will give up on me? On us?"

"No. Never!" He defended.

"You won't even try fighting for me? For us?" My heart sank.

"You're worth more than a fight, Noorie. Do you think I won't try my best to make us happen? But I don't want to fight your father."

"I am not asking you to fight him or throw punches or dishonour him." I gnashed out. "You won't even want to try that because I would rip you apart." He laughed. It was not funny. Nothing was funny at that moment, not with everything that was happening. "I meant convincing him with words."

"I know. I understand your point."

Despite my voice kept rising with angst, his was still subdued with understanding, barely rising a bit.

"Don't you have faith in yourself?"

"I do, Haya...Noorie. I want to believe whatever reason he might refuse our union would be for the best. Besides, he is yet to say anything. Why should we sit here and assume the worst?"

"I don't like the way you are talking. I don't like this conversation." I stomped my feet to each sentence like a spoilt brat who was denied something. Tears burned my eyes. The height of frustration was already greater than me. I ended the call having nothing more to say to him nor wanting to listen to what more he had to say.

Two days passed before my father gave his answer. He had come to meet me immediately the adhan for subhi was called. I was still in bed. Dad had told me to see him after prayer. I knew it had to be a serious conversation.

"Come here. Sit next to me." Dad spoke as he taps the space by his side. I treaded the room with caution then settled down. "I know my silence the past two weeks would have agitated you."