Bleed&Fight for You (smut warning)

Chapter 19

(Please don't hate me)

[Lafayette's POV]
"John?" I asked softly, opening Alex's apartment with my spare key and setting down the bag of groceries.
I heard muffled crying from the bathroom and tip toed over to the door.
"John...are you okay?" I asked, tapping the door with my knuckles.
"Go away Laf!" John yelled before bursting out into more tears.
"John...I came to help," I sighed, slightly annoyed at him yelling at me.
John opened the door slightly and wiped his eyes.
"Mon ami, what's wrong?" I asked, wrapping him into a tight hug.
"It's A-Alex, I'm s-so worried about h-him," John stuttered, crying into my chest.
"John...they'll find him...shh it's okay, he's going to be fine," I soothed, petting his curly hair.
John had been my best friend since high school. I knew everything there was to know about him, including every guy he had a crush on. Hell, I even knew he was gay before he did. What matters is that I know that he is very sensitive. He tends to overreact, but this time I have a bad feeling about this. I trusted John on this one.
"C-can y-you make m-me f-food?" John asked after he had calmed down.
"Of course," I said, letting him sit down on the ground and walking out of the bathroom. I grabbed a blanket and a pillow off of Alex's bed and wrapped him like a burrito, something he used to do when he would sleep over at my house. He cuddled up to the pillow I placed on the ground and almost immediately relaxed.
I padded over to the kitchen, looking for food to make him. There wasn't any food in the cupboards. Like, literally. There was literally nothing in the fridge or any of the cupboards.
"John?" I asked, walking back over to the bathroom, "when's the last time you ate?"
"Um, two days ago, maybe?" he mumbled.
"John, you can't do that to yourself," I said, sitting down by his side.
"I know...I just, don't know what to do," he sighed.
I nodded and put my hand out, "let's get you some food."
John nodded and followed me into the kitchen.
"You got food?" he asked, sitting down in front of the bag of groceries.
"Yeah, just a few things," I said, pulling a container of muffins from the bag, "I know you couldn't get to the store to get anything in your...condition, so I picked up some stuff."
John nodded and rested his head on his hands, "do you have any coffee?"
I pulled out the container of coffee and smiled, "I know you and Alex, neither of you ever sleep."
John chuckled and watched as I walked over to the coffee machine and started a pot.
"So, do you have any more news of Alex?" I asked, my voice lowering.
"They found the person that...took him," John sighed, "they went to his house yesterday."
I nodded and sat on the counter, "and what did they find?"
"I don't know...they haven't told me anything new," he mumbled.
"Don't worry Mon ami, they'll find him," I replied.
John nodded and ran his hand through his hair, "God, I'm such a mess."
"I can't argue with that, mon ami," I chuckled.
John sadly smiled and pointed to the coffee machine, "coffee is done."
I strode over to the machine and poured a cup for John.
"I didn't buy any sugar but I bought milk, if you want that," I said, walking back over to the small table.
"No, I like it black," John said, taking the warm cup and smelling the dark liquid.
I hummed a nameless tune as I put away the rest of the groceries that I had bought.
"Thank you...for everything Laf," John smiled, "it really means a lot."
"No problem," I said, waving my hand in the air as if to dismiss his comment.
"I just hope Alex is okay," he murmured.

[Alex's POV]
I gripped the razor, aiming it over my wrist. I pressed it against my arm, pointing down towards my inner elbow.
I watched as I slowly cut a long line from my wrist to my inner elbow, the blood gushing out of the deep cut.
It looked so evil, rushing out of my arm and spilling onto the floor. It made a sound like rain. I smiled. I had always liked the rain. Wait, no i didn't. Or did I? I couldn't remember much.
I fell to the floor, dropping the razor next to me. The loud clatter hurt my ears.
The edges of my vision blurred and I smiled, knowing that all of the pain would be over soon.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.
"I'm sorry I wasn't enough John," I whispered, seeing dots dance across the room.
I felt lightheaded and dizzy and I could hear a muffled crash. There was a distant humming of voices but I couldn't figure out where it was coming from.
I tried to call out to them but my voice didn't work. Was John here? The last thing I heard was blood rushing through my ears and my heart beat slowing down.
Then everything went black.