hate to love you.

fifty-five

"you mean to tell me, there's a faster way to get here? and, you didn't tell me?" i said gasping. selena giggled.

"you didn't ask!" she said throwing her hands up in defense. demi just stared at her and kept smiling.

i think, selena is the one.

"if you want, i can make you something to eat?" selena asked standing up. at the word 'eat' i started to get nauseous.

my head felt like it was turning in circles, and i bent forward and released the vomit i had inside of me.

also known as, pancakes and all of the shit i'd eaten this morning. "oh!" selena gasped surprised.

but, like always, demi was behind me rubbing my back.

"are you okay?" selena asked. i nodded.

demi picked me up in her arms, and carried me to the nearest bathroom. she took us into the corner and locked the door.

"it's been a while since you've had sickness. do you think something's wrong?" demi asked worried.

i shook my head 'no'.

"have you been feeling different lately?" she asked rubbing my back still. i opened my eyes a bit more and looked up at demi.

"now that you mention it, i've been having some pains in my lower back and down there. i have cramps all of the time, but i think nothing of it." i said.

selena knocked on the door. "are y'all okay in there? should i call someone, or is she okay?" she asked. demi smiled.

"babe, it's okay." she said smiling again. i smiled at her, seeing how happy she seemed to be.

"she makes you happy. you deserve it. keep her." i said smiling. she smiled and nodded, but then remembered the current situation.

"we should take you to a d-" she began.

"no, i'm fine. it's just because of all of the food i've been dating lately. i don't think it's sitting well." i said standing up slowly.

"yeah. want to go back out?" asked, opening the door. i walked out and met a worried selena.

"i'm sorry. would y'all like to just sit and hang around? play a game, maybe?" she asked.

i nodded, and smiled.

"let's play sorry." selena squealed. "not sorry..." demi said mumbling making us all laugh.

halfway through the game that selena was winning, i swear she's cheating, my stomach pains were coming back, and they were stronger than ever.

"fuck." i said holding my lower stomach and back. demi shot up and came over to me.

"baby?" she asked. selena looked up, "huh?" she said, and then looked at me and realized it was directed to me.

"aw that's cute." demi said laughing.

meanwhile i felt like i was pissing my pants. nope, don't feel like, i'm actually pissing my fucking pants.

"demi, i'm fucking pissing my pants!" i yelled running to the nearest bathroom. i could tell that something was seriously wrong, because demi was sobbing as she was following me.

i closed and locked the door behind me, as i heard demi banging on the door telling me to let her in.

i pulled down my pants, and noticed as a pool of blood fell out of me. my period isn't usually this heavy.

i can't believe it, this can't be what i think it is. oh no, please.

i began to sob in my own hands as demi and selena found their way through the locked doors.

it's as if, my life isn't normal anymore. too many tragic things happen to me. why me?

"oh no, baby!" demi sobbed, selena standing behind her in shock, but crying also because she knows what this means.

"what's happening?" i said crying into demi's shoulder.

"i think you've lost your baby." she said.

the last words any pregnant mother would want to hear. even me.