The White Wolf #Wattys2020

Chapter 14

Not fully edited!

Kai

I couldn't breathe. My lungs seemed to have collapsed and it took all my strength not to sink to the floor. My body was shaking as though I were out in the cold with no covering. I felt trapped in a big block of ice.

My Betas, Shaun and Jaxon had to carry me to the Elders. There I was given poppy and ginger to ease the pain, but it did nothing.

"I, Laura Coltraine, Kin of the Northern Mountain Pack and Warrior of the Blue Moon Pack, reject my Mate."

The words replayed themselves in my mind over and over again like a film stuck on repeat. My stomach churned uncomfortably and I raced to the bathroom to empty its contents.

"Shit, Kai," Roland swore when he saw me hanging over the toilet bowl. He filled a glass of water in the sink and handed it to me, but I pushed it away before throwing up again.

When I finally felt my stomach somewhat settle, I raised a quivering hand and flushed. Heaving myself to my feet, I stood still for a minute to let my sensitive stomach calm down again.

"She rejected me, Ro," I croaked, feeling my throat raw with sorrow. My eyes threatened to tear up, something I hadn't done since I was a pup. Not even when my father died had I shed a tear, but the thought of losing my Mate made me feel so many things. Regret. Guilt. Heartbreak.

I knew I deserved it, I knew I did. I thought rejecting her was the worst pain I could feel, but being rejected made it feel like nothing. I would have rather had her drown me in silver than her dismiss me.

The gnawing feeling at my heart made me lean against the sink in pain. I coughed violently and winced at the pain under my ribs. Antal let out a high pitched whine, letting me know he was hurting too.

"What have I done. Oh, Goddess, what have I done to our Mate," I cried to my wolf.

"Please, we can't lose her. We need her. She'll want us. We have to show her we want her. Please. Please, we need her." For a moment I wasn't sure if Antal was talking to me, when I realised he was praying. He was asking our Moon Goddess for a chance.

"She thinks I want to use her," I rasped to Roland. "I don't want to, Roland. I just want her. Please, I just want her."

I never felt this vulnerable. My heart pounded unsteadily and my breaths came out in uneven gasps. "Please, I need her."

My vision began to blur and my grip on the sink fell away. I would have tumbled to the floor if my cousin hadn't caught me.

"Kai? Kai!" His voice sounded dampened, like he was speaking to me through a thick glass window. I felt him shaking me, but his touch grew numb.

My head fell back and I fainted.

I came around again two days later. I woke in my bed at the pack house, with my mother sitting on a chair next to me. When my eyelids unglued themselves, I winced at the bright sunlight burning my irises.

"Oh, my boy, you're finally awake," she gushed, grabbing my head and plastering it with kisses. She pushed my hair from my forehead and sat on the edge of the bed, holding my hand tightly. "How do you feel?"

My bones groaned in protest as I pushed myself into an upright position. I leaned back into my pillows, staring aimlessly at the wall across from me. "I...I..." I couldn't find any words to say.

She seemed to understand though. "I know it hurts, Kai, and I know you feeling like you're falling apart and are withering away inside."

I shook my head. "You don't know what it's like to be rejected though," I whispered, my voice hoarse because of my dry throat.