Sugar •roman reigns•

28

Dean's POV

With Zee being gone, my whole mind was focused just on Seth. Seth this, Seth that. Seth is so damn beautiful, and I cant get him out of my head! I tried music, I tried sleeping, I even tried binge eating while watching Netflix series. Nothing works, though. I just end up thinking of me singing to him while he lays beside me, I think of him when I dream, and I think of how much I wish he was with me while I watch Netflix.

I listen to him talk to his girlfriend and the only thing I can say to myself is "oh how I wish that was me"

He wasn't so sure if things were going good with Chelsea, but then, out of the blue she told him she wanted to be with him for the rest of her life. They've been super close ever since. So I haven't had time with Seth at all, I'm so broken over it. My heart's incomplete...

I'm actually feeling pathetic, I feel bad for my own self. So I'm wrapped in a blanket, eating out of a container of ice cream, and watching a romance comedy. Fuck, I'm so done with myself. I suck at life, I suck dick. Literally. I'm only good at wrestling. I don't belong in relationships, at least that's what people think. I'm always accused of being a womanizer or I only stick with one night stands. How the fuck can I be a womanizer if I'm pretty much turning completely gay for Seth Rollins?

If I got to be with him once, I'd never go back to a girl again. Strictly dickly. Wink wink.

My crush is so bad, that I go on the Internet and search 'Ambrollins'. I look at all the fan art, read opinions on 'ambrollins', I smile at all the photoshop of Seth and I, holding hands. I wish it were real. I wish I was actually holding hands with Seth. I wish he felt the way I do, and then we could act out a scene in a romance movie where we dramatically confess our love for eachother then kiss passionately. I wish, I wish, I fucking wish.

Life is hard when you're Dean Ambrose.

♧♧

I didn't realize I fell asleep until I woke up feeling very sticky. I open my eyes and the ice cream container is tipped over on my lap, soaking me and the couch with the melted flavored cream. I throw my head back and let out a long, loud groan. Just then, there was a knock on the door.

I got up, covering the spill on myself with the blanket and answer the door. Fuck, its Seth. What does he want?

"Hey buddy, I um, I noticed we haven't hung out at all, so I was wondering if you would like to?" I felt myself get all giddy inside.

"Of course I want to hang out with you." I sounded more excited than I should've revealed. I mentally slap myself, then repeat my answer in a more manly tone and less happiness. "I mean, yes, I'm not busy or anything so that's fine."

Seth raises his eyebrows and laughs. "Okay, let's go."

"Let me go change, you can come in." After I let him in, I ran to my room, grab clothes and headed into the shower. Once I shut the door, I literally slid down the tiled wall, my heart racing. I finally get to hang out with him! I wanted to let out a happy laugh, but I didnt want to have to explain that to Seth, so I jumped in the shower, and quickly washed, then got out and put my fresh clothes on. I spray some cologne and brush my teeth.

You never know. Wink.

I played cool, and walked out to Seth. "I'm ready."

"Alright."

♡♡♡

A taxi dropped us off at Buffalo Wild wings. Seth's choice, I guess. It's cool, now I get to look at his face and not have to make up an excuse why! Smart me. I mean, yeah, I'm totally smart.

We walked in, and I was distracted by the smell of the wings and the giant TVs with a football game on. I hadn't realized Seth got a table until he started walking with the waitress. I caught up without getting embarrassed, and followed.

We got to our table, and my face dropped. He invited Chelsea. What the fuck am I supposed to do now? I watched as he kissed her lips, and just felt completely drained.

"I hope you don't mind, Dean. I really wanted to see her."

"So why am I here?" I ask, trying not to sound like I care.

"You seem sad, and when people are sad, they choose food as a coping mechanism. So here you are, yay!"

I didn't laugh or smile. I didnt think it was funny or awesome at all, it's like a sick fucking joke. Me being being a good 'friend', I didn't leave, so for my beverage, I got beer.

It's okay to forget, right?

♢♢

Beer number 4, an hour into the meal. All they did was flirt, and laugh, and kiss, and flirt, and laugh, and fucking kiss. I was sick. I was so upset. So hurt. I wanted to leave so bad, but I didnt want to blow him off because of a dumb crush I have on him. I'd rather kill myself 1000 different ways than sit here and watch them infront of me. If my eyes were lasers, Chelsea would have a head anymore.

I cannot believe I'm fucking jealous of this girl!

Her hand touching his arm, his face, even his hands. Bitch, you better scoot away. No, I said scoot away, not lay your fucking head on his shoulder. Oh hell no, you did not just make a comment about how comfy he is, that's what I'm supposed to say. Girl, if you get any clos- what the fuck did I just say? I am pretty damn sure I didn't say "Practically sit on his lap and start kissing every inch of his face". You are so lucky that fireworks are illegal here because I would fucking strap 200 firecrackers to you and go make some popcorn, then watch you burst into flames.

I'm angry. I'm jealous. I'm feeling tipsy...

After my 6th beer, I couldnt stand it anymore. I got up, slightly stumbling, with tears in my eyes and I walked away from that table. I ran out the door.

A nice little Dean chapter. Poor him, so heartbroken. I hate Chelsea so much, I'm literally going to scream. But yeah, something different :)  I can't believe this is my third chapter I've written in the past few hours of reuniting with wattpad! keep the comments coming, and tell me what you think :)

all the love, xx