It's been weeks after the whole Alex incident and I'm still not okay. That's the thing with me, one thing can bring me down, and I will stay down for a very long time. I will think over and over about what I could have done to prevent the thing from happening and I will get even more sad. All I have done the past few weeks was go to class with Molly and drown my sorrows away in fast food.
Luke has been watching me though, I "talk" to him every night. He asks me what he can do to make me better and I shrug. Luke is trying, my mom is trying, my sister is trying, even Harry has tried cheering me up over Skype, but I'm not trying.
Luke has been going to classes as well, but unlike me he isn't wallowing in self pity. He is going to parties and going to the movies and going places with Calum and Michael.
It must suck for him to come back to the dorm, because all he sees and a pathetic person with red blotchy cheeks surrounded by McDonalds French Frys. I probably ruin Luke's day by simply being a part of it.
"Smile." Luke would say when he walks into the room, "at least smile one time today."
I would give him a fake smile and he would glare at me and ask me if I want food, when he already knows the answer will be no because I've been eating basically all day.
Today, however was different. He walks in, a hopeful look is on his face and he smiles to me, "want some tea?"
I shake my head "no", and stumble back to my bed. I sit on the bed and look over the notes I took today in my psychology class. I internally groan when Luke sits beside me, I just want to be alone.
"So I know you have been sad and everything lately," he signs, "so I got you a gift."
I look at him in confusion, he doesn't have to get me anything.
He pulls out a envelope from his front pocket and hands it to me, I open it and find two tickets to see a play.
"I know that you are minoring in theatre, so I thought maybe you would like to go to a play?" He sighs, "and it's for deaf people, the actors sign throughout the play and I don't know I thought you would like to go."
I nod enthusiastically and hug Luke, I have heard about the plays that are put on especially for people with hearing issues, my mom has never got around to taking me to one.
"Thank you," I sign to him, "seriously, thank you. It's really thoughtful."
He nods and blushes and takes my hand. He holds it for a second and I look down at our connected hand in confusion. Why is he holding my hand? Why do I like it?
Before I could question myself more Luke pulls away and signs, "the play is in a couple days. So yeah... I have to go shower. I'll be back."
