Strings

A Run

"And so what if you find out yourself. What you gonna hit me? Or worse make me hear you sing again?" If anything hurt it was that. Man did that hurt like hell as my facial expression remained unchanged and the both of us stood our ground. But as my eyes pierced into hers I could see her face begin to grow fearful almost like she was waiting for me to strike her. 

"Go get dressed. We leave in 20 minutes and I don't want to be late for work." I said walking to the bathroom to put my badge on feeling my heart break in half.

FLASHBACK ENDS

"Mom, you think it's too much for her? She seem's exhausted." I asked as Cap continued to run next to me as we made our fourth lap.

"She's fine. I did the same with you and you didn't die. Believe me I'm going easy on her."

"Yeah she's just not sleeping so well."

"Stef come sit with me. You ran enough." 

Stopping slowly and catching my breath we both took a seat on the nearby bench to wipe the sweat off and take a few sips of water as I continued to watch my little girl struggle.

" Talk to me what's going on with the both of you. I haven't asked you in a couple of weeks."

"It's ok. Just I thought we were making progress but everytime I think that it's like we got back three steps."

"Yes. What happened recently?"

"I don't know. We actually talked a few weeks ago. Like a normal talk and since then she's been even worse. Bad enough I found those cigarettes in room." I confessed taking another sip of water.

"What did you talk about?"

"Um..her foster mother a bit and music. I even heard her playing mama. She doesn't know I heard her but I did."

Watching Callie make her first lap she looked even more exhausted as I felt Cap place her hand on my knee.

"What was it like when you first moved in with Sharon?"

"MM tough. I mean she was the kindest woman I've ever met but I didn't give her an easy time."

"And you were Callie's age?"

"Yeah."

"Honey you know you gave her a hard time because you couldn't trust anyone. I think your daughter, well I know she feels the same. Sure you had a little moment but in my eyes it scared her.  Because she does love you, and she does remember you but it will take time. You know it will."

"I know. I know she thinks I'll leave her or just fuck up. Screw up."

"You're human. But she will break down. Just keep at it. Keep showing her who you are. You and Lena both. She will break down because there is only so much someone can handle especially at her age and eventually she will come to terms with everything and begin to accept the help she's getting. The same way her mother did." She said looking to me and smiling.

"Thanks mom."

"Anytime. Stef you were a tough kid but easy to love."

"I didn't feel like I was easy to love. I mean I didn't give you an easy time either."

"Not always but you were. And my heart opened for you instantly. I don't know what life is like without you anymore, and I don't want to know."

Glancing to her she smiled warmly at me as she slid her hand into mine.

"I was lucky to have two mothers in my life. Thank you for loving me."

"You're welcome. And I will always love you baby. You are a good one and you are my heart." It was not usual for her to be so open or this affectionate but it was making me tear.