The Tears Are Real (Avengers/Parker x reader)

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A little prom season story

"Name?"

"Y-you know my name, Mr. Stark."

"That may be true, Parker, but arguing with me might not be in your best interests right now."

"Right, of...of course...yeah..." Peter stuttered, shifting his stance uncomfortably. "My name is Peter Parker...sir. Which, you knew..."

"What did I just say?" Tony snapped, looking up from his tablet, completely straight-faced and stern.

"Sorry, Mr. Stark, I wasn't arguing...I swear."

"Mmm hmm, sounded like arguing to me. Didn't it sound like that to you, Cap?"

"Certainly did," Steve agreed readily. "Is there a problem with authority that we need to be concerned with, Mr. Parker?"

"What?! No! No, Ste-Captain...sir. No problem whatsoever!"

Steve smiled curtly and took the tablet from Tony's hands, doing his best to not smile at the poor kid, knowing that the men of the team were just giving him a hard time, and that maybe they were taking their roles a little too seriously. Pete had asked to take you to his prom months ago, and was given their permission almost right away, but ever since the team had all but adopted you as their own a few years before, every one of them took full advantage of any chance to play authoritarian.

"You a virgin?"

"Buck!" Steve snapped, looking up at his friend, completely aghast at the question. "That's really none of our business!"

"How do ya figure?" Bucky shrugged, taking measured steps towards Pete with a steady gaze on the young man. "He's taking our girl to prom, and you know how boys think. I'd been around the block a couple times by the time I was his age."

"Yeah, me too," Clint joined in, standing up from his seat at the bar to join Bucky, looking equally concerned.

"I was around a couple and a half, at least," Tony concurred.

Sam had to finish choking on his drink before he could respond, tears in his eyes from both the struggle and his laughter at the situation, feeling absolutely no remorse and no urge to save the poor kid from the situation. "Shit," he snickered, "I owned the block."

"Okay, but still," Steve argued, "I don't think that's really an appropriate-"

"How many times had you circled the block by his age, Cap?" Tony pushed, the mischievous grin practically lighting the room around him. "I mean...I assume that you rounded a corner at least, right?"

"That's definitely none of your business, Stark."

"Come on, Rogers, share with the group. Consider it...team bonding."

Steve made his first mistake in looking to Sam to save him, only to find his friend eager to hear his magic number as much as Tony was. Turning to Clint, he found much of the same, seeing inquisitive eyes and unsupportive smirks as his only response. Even Bucky was getting in on the fun, but Steve had already known better than to even consider his best friend as a source of safety. "Alright, Parker, I think the interrogation is over," he finally groaned, tossing the tablet heavily onto the table at his side, "I'll just go get (Y/N)." The room filled with boos and grumbles about not playing along and how Rogers was an old fuddy-duddy, but he did his best to ignore them as he left the room; at least until you and your date were long gone so that you wouldn't have to witness the carnage that the Captain was sure to unleash.

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