Numbers || Andy Biersack

chapter seven

Andy let me cry for nearly ten minutes. The car was silent except for the sound of my sobs. He sat beside me with his arms crossed, staring out the dashboard window. He just looked so mad. No matter how much I cried, he wouldn't dare to look over at me. Andy's jaw was tensed and I could only imagine how much he hated me in that  moment. I kind of hated myself too.

I never should have lied. I should have told Andy that first night that I was sixteen. If I had, I wouldn't be sitting in his car right now, sobbing into the sleeves of my sweater. My makeup was probably smeared all over my face and I must have looked hideous. I guess it didn't matter though. Since Andy would no longer want anything to do with me, I could look as ugly as I pleased. However, the thought only succeeded in making me more upset.

Finally, Andy turned towards me and snapped, "Okay, enough. Stop crying and give me an explanation." 

His tone was harsh and biting, no longer the soft deep tone he always spoke to me in. I tried to stop my sobs, curling into myself a little. I pulled my feet up onto the leather seats, finding comfort in the compact position.

"I-I don't know what to say," I whimpered.

"Just tell me then: are you sixteen?" Andy snapped.

"Y-yes," I muttered. "I never meant to lie to y-"

"Yeah, you did!" Andy yelled. "I explicitly asked you the night we met how old you were and you lied straight to my fucking face."

"I'm sorry," I said, my breathing uneven. "I just liked you so much and I knew you wouldn't want to be with me if I was sixteen. You make me feel so amazing, like I'm not just some dumb kid."

"But you are! You're a child and I basically raped you."

"No, no, you didn't. I wanted this. I wanted you. You never took advantage of me like that."

"You don't know what you want because you're sixteen years old," Andy snapped. "I can't even fucking look at you right now."

"It's not like you haven't lied," I argued.

"Yeah, I did. But cheating on your girlfriend isn't illegal. Having sex with a teenager is. I can't believe I fucking let this happen, " he groaned to himself.

"It's not that big of a deal," I said, trying to calm him and salvage what we had.

"Not that big a deal? " he gaped. "This is fucking illegal. I could be arrested for this. You're sixteen! God, that's so wrong."

"No, it isn't!" I protested, my voice rising. "You can't tell me that this hasn't been amazing for you. If you do, you're lying."

"Just because I liked it doesn't mean it isn't wrong. I liked being with you because I thought it was legal."

"No, you liked me. I may be sixteen but that doesn't make me stop being the person you said all those nice things to in the coffee shop."

"None of that matters now," Andy stated. "It doesn't matter if I still think you're an awesome person. You're too young. What we've been doing is illegal and I'm not going to go to jail over it."

"You won't. No one would have to know."

"People would find out."

I rolled my eyes. "You've been pretty good at keeping our relationship a secret so far. I turn 18 in a year and a half, and then we can be a normal couple."

"No, Kourt. What don't you get?" Andy questioned. "This is wrong. I'm not going to be with you. This was all a huge mistake."

I felt like I'd been punched in the stomach. He couldn't mean that, but the power in his tone made me believe otherwise. Hot tears pooled in my eyes once more, sliding down my cheeks as another tsunami of emotions overtook me.