My Mistress

Chapter 10

After the encounter with Mistress and Miss Noris in the staffs' lounge, I was sent to fetch water for the horses by none other than, you guessed right, Miss Noris.

When she finally saw Mistress earlier, she stuttered and made a fool of herself. It was so comical, I really can't believe I restrained myself from laughing my ass off.

I'm quite proud of myself.

I just looked down at the white-tiled floor and listened until Miss Noris sent me away immediately after Mistress addressed her.

Guess Mistress was looking for that old fart, not for me...

Of course not me, I nodded as I convinced myself.

Getting your hopes up only for it to go crumbling back down to ash, that's something I ain't guaranteeing myself with.

But before I went away, I looked back at Mistress to fill the aching need inside of me with the wondrous sight of hers.

Our eyes briefly met. My breath hitched and I gulped. Her piercing eyes dug deep into my soul as Cupid arrowed me straight to the heart...

I'm being dramatic but seriously though, I felt butterflies swarm my insides when her eyes followed me out.

I'm not quite sure but I felt a stare at the back of my head as I went out the backdoor. Could be Miss Noris yet here I am, trying to make a fool of myself, again, by thinking Mistress' interested in some nitwit like me.

Maybe she is...

We'll never know.

I sighed as I revisited the remains of my dream in my head. It felt so surreal. I could still feel her warm body against mine.

The thought instantly warmed certain areas of my body, go figure.

Now here I am, buckets filled with water on both ends of the stick over my shoulders. It may look difficult but I was raised in the difficult and hard way so it's nothing I couldn't do.

I fetched water for the horses a couple of times. The well from the stables has great distance between them. It's worning me out.

My shoulders are aching. My hands are reddish. My clothes are a bit wet. Add those to my growling stomach and weakening body.

How I wish someday, my life wouldn't be like this.

The instant the idea popped, questions swarmed my mind making my head hurt.

Will my father come back for me? Will I ever see mother again? Will I get to play with my litte brother once more?

An aching feeling washed over me that made me weak in the knees, it finally gave out.

I fell on the filthy ground. Sound of bucket clanging against soil and dried grass could be heard.

I watched the water spread and trail into the dents of the ground as heavy feeling of longing and grief and sorrow held me tight as its captive.

I couldn't breathe.

Tears stinging the back of my eyelids.

Not taking the despair anymore, I hurt myself.

With clenched fist, I repeatedly punched my chest to divert the pain. I yelled and cursed to somehow mitigate this ache.

Many nights I spent trying not to feel. For days on end, I'd feel sore all over. For days on end, I'd remain in the presence of physical pain. I'd bruise myself and forget about my emotional pain.

At the very least, it's working...

Slowly, I began to calm myself.

They're not worth it...

I'd rather die working my ass off than to dwell in the deepest darkest pit in the back of my mind where abandon resides and pity myself.

It never took me anywhere.

I tarried with it and yet I'm still here...

I closed my eyes and took a breather.

I'll just distract myself with work.

I stood and steadied myself with the door of the stable. I placed my back against it as I tried so hard to bury the resurfacing memories.

Finally, when I knew I won't be toppling myself over, I took the pole and the buckets. I trudged my way inside and placed them at the far wall where other cleaning tools are located.

I turned to my left to see a particular horse. In a way, Storm reminded me of myself. We're kind of similar.

We're both abandoned.

I found her treking in the nearby woods. She was severely wounded.

That day, I was supposed to escape, but instead, I met her. I brought her here and here we are.

I smiled at the thought.

She's purebred white with strong limbs and healthy long white mane and tail.

I walked towards her and placed an open palm before me. She reached over and let me touch her snout.

You could hear the sighs and neighs of the horses at the stable.

It's calming.

Storm breathed out on her nose, it was so cute it made me giggle.

It's food time for me for I've done almost all of my chores except one: pick up Mistress' unclean clothes.

I sighed as I reached over and took a brush. I made my way over Storm's body and brushed it gently. I haven't done this in a while.

I looked Storm in the eyes and said, "You know, sometimes I feel so lonely. I wish you could talk." Storm simply bobbed her head as if she understood me. At this, I softly smiled.

I faced Storm and carefully grabbed her snout. I stroked it and muttered, "Well, I gotta go. Behave, okay?" I smiled one last time at her as she neighs and blows through her nose.

I swear she understands me.

I fixed some things on the stable and left. I trudged my way over to the mansion while peering at a familiar window. A silhouette can be seen from the other side.

Now this time I'm sure she's waiting for me. I'm the one to pick up her clothes anyway.

As soon as I entered the mansion through the backdoor, I looked at the wall clock to see it's already half past one.

Shit.

I'm late.

Now, I'm done for.