[ It was as if
the only goddamned way
for Harmony to grow
was if Orsai was chained to her bed. ]
Orsai is alive.
Bedridden, but still breathing.
Despite the strange events leading up to the accident, Harmony swea...
She hands me a mug of lightly steaming hot chocolate.
"Thank you."
"Don't mention it.
What're you doing in your room by yourself anyway?
Want me to show you something cool?"
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"Does this mean... we're friends again?"
A pause, then,
"Only if you promise to sort yourself out."
"What do you mean?"
"Speak to Auntie Zainab about everything and just... sort your problems out because I can feel all this s a d n e s s around you
and it makes me...worried."
"Oh." I don't know how talking to Mother about what I'm thinking will help
but...
I'm willing to try, even if it's only for Zaina.
A.N. Dedicated to Aishiiiteru for all of your lovely support, thank you so much for being so generous with your votes sweetheart <3 Hope you've been doing well~
Both me and Harmony have a huuuuuge way to go in this journey of 'sorting ourselves out' and figuring out how to think about our experiences, feeling and emotions in a critical sort of way instead of pushing things away to deal with later.
Everyone has their personal challenges, strengths and faults. I have to remind myself of that often because I always tend to forget that I've never been the only one who's gone through hard times and obstacles. Reminding myself of that makes me feel a little stronger, I think to myself 'if they got through it, then maybe I can too' and keep pushing through that journey.
One of the biggest things I struggle with is patience. I'm a quick, fast and fairly efficient sort of person, a personality type A, someone who can't stand taking it one.step.at.a.time. I have to write quickly, draw, clean, eat, talk and live quickly. Even then, I'm not satisfied unless everyone else is marching to mybeat. So I boss and order and bully until I can force them into hurrying up.
Which is a big reason why writing a cell phone novel has been so strangely helpful in teaching me a bit about patience.
But it's not enough, I've still got a long way to go and I can't rely only on CPNs to teach me. I've got to take up that responsibility myself and take my own steps. Have you ever overcome a major internal struggle? How did you do it?
Also, unrelated question, do you think I should set up more social media accounts other than twitter? I'm not a fan of facebook, but where else do you guys want to see me? Lemme know in the comments below :)
