His Way To Sainthood

Ang Tunay na Queen Mother ng Taon

#HWTS26

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I was so drained and confused after the talk. I think I didn't need Richard's mother anyway; I was already confused as I am. I have this uncanny ability to just... choose someone else before me. I don't know. I kept on looking for reasons why it was just okay for me. Siguro dahil hindi naman ako pinalaking ambitious ng mga magulang ko. Or sanay ako na hindi ako priority. Or siguro nu'ng nagkaroon ng crisis sa Spain isa ako sa mga teacher na natanggal dahil 'di naman daw ako magaling. Sorry Ma. Charot.

I traced back my roots. When I was in college, sanay na rin naman akong sumasalo ng group works because my groupmates weren't reliable enough. I don't know. Maybe it all depends on a person's upbringing or past experiences. I am not sure. Quen was completely amazed how I love people - or just Richard, to be specific - but Leo's just cool with it. With her personality? Alam ko nang ganyan magmahal 'yang babaeng 'yan. He told us once na para bang iniintay nya lang na ma-inlove ako dahil given na martir at tanga ako.

Leo, tanga ba talaga ako?

Anong gusto mong sabihin ko? Hindi? Maine, ang tali-talino mo, gano'n? Naso-solve ang problema mo sa pagtatago mo?

Alam ko naman kasi na hindi okay 'yung ginagawa ko. Tsaka sige. Tanga na ako. But really, tanga ba ako? Because I still find it... okay? Na pinipilit kong huwag magalit ng todo kasi pinili ko naman 'to?

We all have individual differences when it comes to love, Maine. May iba na natatakot harapin ang feelings nila. Maybe they're just too proud to admit that they have lost to the feeling itself, and not to the person. May iba naman, na gaya mo, na pag umibig, ibig talaga. Kung bigay, bigay talaga. And I think that's actually... okay.

Papagalitan ka ni Quen dahil kung anu-ano ang sinasabi mo sa akin. Alam mo namang ikaw ang nagbibigay ng eleventh, twelfth, at thirteenth commandments sa akin, eh.

Siguro... isipin mo na lang na mas marami na akong beses sa'yong nagmahal, Maine, and I've met people who are worse than you. I am even worse than you.

Bakit? Toxic ka rin ba magmahal?

I don't know, Maine. One could never accurately describe the way he or she loves. My answer may be pretty much subjective because you would only hear my side. But I'd tell you one thing: It's not the end of the world. 

But Quen kept on reminding me na magtira ako para sa sarili ko. And I think... that's what the world wanted to tell me, too.

Tandang-tanda ko 'yung ngiti sa bibig ni Leo noong sinabi ko sa kanya 'yon. That's what the world said, Maine. What about your heart? What does it say?  He tapped my shoulder lightly and walked past me. Have you listened to it well?

Pero world na nga 'yon, eh. General opinion.

Bakit? Nagsurvey ka na ba? Sa akin pa nga lang na nakadikit sa'yo, nane-negate na 'yung sinasabi ni Quen. Paano pa kaya kapag nag-interview ka ng iba't-ibang tao? You might get surprised with the answers you'd get. 

Leo, alam mo, para kayong devil at angel ni Quen sa balikat ko. But I don't really know who's the angel and who's the devil. 

We're both devils, Maine. After all, loving someone entirely is a devious act. Pero sige, sabihin na natin na kalahati ng mundo, sinasabi sa'yong tumigil na kasi tanga ka na.  Wala nang matitira sa'yo. Let's just consider Quen's opinion because he only wanted the best for you and I understand that he's trying to protect you like a mother hen. But having the world's general opinion... is it already considered the truth? Kapag sinasabi ng marami, totoo na?