All Because of a Turtle [Modern Day Lams FanFiction]

Chapter 16

Johns POV

I hummed a slight tune as I walked down the halls to the dorms, my earbuds plugged in as I listened to random music. I made it to the dorm, and put the key in the lock and fiddled around with it. Soon I heard the satisfying click of the door then turned the doorknob and walked in.

Right when I opened the door and closed it, I took out my earbuds then looked up.

Alex sat there, in his chair staring at a letter. I froze. The paper was pink. God please no.

"Alexander?"

My whole body melted, and turned into water at the sigh before me. Alexander was staring at the purple letter, and no doubt he'd read it. No. This wasn't supposed to happen. God, please let it not be the letter. Please, just do me this one favor and-

"John? What is this?" Alex mumbled, his eyebrows knotted together as he turned to me, staring at the letter. He looked up to me with a look of confusion.

I swallowed a huge lump in my throat, I tried to speak but I couldn't. I didn't know how.

"It's not fair." I finally croaked out.

"What?" Alex returned, in a soft whisper. It was clear e was confused, it was written all over his face.

"It's not fair, Alexander." I said, in a more loud tone. I lost control of my words, I lost control of my mouth.

"John, what're you ta-"

"I loved you first, Alexander. It's not fair. I loved you first, and then Eliza came and ruined it!" I shouted, my voice cracking as tears welled up in my eyes. I regretted those words as soon as they came out of my mouth.

He stared at me in shock, and I could spot a few tears in his eyes as well.

"John-"

I didn't bother to listen to what he said. By the time he finished my name I was already sprinting out the door. I ran. I ran down the hallway as fast as I could, ignoring the confused glances and the occasional slow downs.

What had I done?

I ruined everything.

I just ran I didn't care what was going on around me, I didn't care if I'd run into someone I just wanted to get away.

I ran and ran for what seemed forever until I found myself at the park. I sniffled then sat on the bench, luckily it wasn't a very popular park so no one was there besides me.

I pulled up my knees to my chest, and hugged them and let my thoughts run wild. I regretted it, I shouldn't have done that. He's dating Eliza. He's dating Eliza. He's dating Eliza.

What bugged me the most, was the fact I'd probably ruined a friendship. Not to mention he was my roommate, I knew I'd be forced to face him soon. But hopefully not too soon.

I didn't want to talk to anyone. Not even Peggy. So I just stayed put, a few tears running down my cheeks. I didn't understand why I was so upset. I couldn't understand why I got so mad. Why I was so worked up over him.

I heard this is what love does to a person, it drives them insane. I suppose I am going insane. So as I sat there one question burned my mind.

Do I love Alexander Hamilton?

*******

Alex's POV

John quickly ran out, before I could finish my sentence. I stared after him mostly in shock. The letter. The conversation. I was confused.

I was dating Eliza, yes. But I was never quite.. satisfied with her. I had pushed it away and guessed it was due to the fact I was never satisfied.

But John. Was I destined to be with Eliza? Or was it John? God. Why must this be so confusing?

John loves me, he just admitted it in person as well. So even if the letter truly wasn't written by him, it was clear he did love me.

But did I love him back? I don't know.

These thoughts past my mind, until I cleared them up. I had to decide what I was to do next. I didn't know what to do now. If Eliza found out, I'd feel terrible. I don't want to end things with Eliza. Do I?

I need to go after him. No. He needs time. No. I could return the favor.

I was always known as a man of words, my writings I chose specific and very fancy words with significant meanings. What if I wrote one to John? What Eliza doesn't know, couldn't hurt her.

I sniffled and grappled the thought for a while until I finally came to a decision. I decided that was what I was to do. I turned around back to my desk, and quickly set the letter down.

I sat and instantly began to write.

*******

Cold in my professions, warm in my friendships, I wish, my dear Laurens, it might be in my power by action rather than words to convince you that I love you. I shall only tell you that before you have confessed, I hardly knew the value you had taught my heart to set upon you. Indeed, my friend, it was not well done. You know the opinion I have on man and how much I hate how mankind is, I wish to keep my happiness independent from others. You should not have taken advantaged of my sensibility to steal into my affections without my consents.

******

So, slightly short chapter but I totally forgot today was Friday so I quickly wrote it. It's not doubled check, so sorry! And yea that's it.