Behind

Chapter 18

I wandered my neighborhood until I eventually made it back to my street. The van didn't take me far, but it shook my brain up. 

What secret was so important that they were willing to put me out for not telling? And why don't I know about it if it's that large?

I walked in my house and went straight to my room, not taking my shoes off. I hoped no one noticed me arrive home because I wanted to be alone when I did what I was planning to do for the next hour or so.

I plopped down on my stomach on my bed and just let the tears flow uncontrollably from my eyes. As much as I wanted to stay strong and act like I wasn't afraid, I truly was afraid. I wasn't only afraid for myself, but for my family and friends who were potentially in the danger zone because of me.

My body shuddered with every powerful sob and I muffled my face in one of my plush pillows, trying to drain out the sound. 

I heard a faint whisper come from the corner of my room. "Honey?" 

I covered my face embarrassingly and wiped my tears. "Mom?" 

My mom walked over to me and sat next to my body on the bed. "Are you okay?"

"Why are you in here?" I demanded, trying to hide the emotion in my voice.

"I was putting away your laundry." She set her hand on my leg.

I moved my leg away from her hand. "I do my own laundry, mom." I sat up and faced her. "What's really going on?"

She looked at me as if she was going to say something important. Quickly her expression changed. "Nothing, nothing's going on." She moved closer to me. "But something is going on with you." 

"Mom stop turning the conversation back on me, I know you're hiding something."

She stared at me and then flicked her eyes mindlessly to the wall past my head. She slid closer to me and hugged me, stretching both of her arms across her body and across mine to embrace me from a side angle. "Just let it out." 

"I'm fine." I said, my voice wavering.

"Teal," She forced my eyes up to her. "It's okay to cry."

"Yeah, well it's not okay to look weak." I bit the inside of my bottom lip.

She looked to her left and her right before she leaned down and kissed my head. "I know exactly what you're going through, it's going to be alright." She whispered almost inaudibly. 

"I doubt that," I mumbled back to her as the tears clogged my throat. "I really doubt that." 

She rubbed my back and craned her head down to catch my full attention. "Things should get easier soon." 

If only she really knew what was going on. I'd love to be able to talk to my mom about my problems like a regular teenager would. This is one teenage crisis that I desperately needed my mom for, but I couldn't turn to her about it. 

I leaned my head into her. I wanted to believe her words, but they just weren't satisfactory.

My phone started ringing and I slapped my phone into the mattress when I felt the vibrations. I picked it up quickly and "Bart" read across the screen. 

My mom stood up and glanced at me briefly as she walked out, as if she knew I needed a moment. She smiled slightly before she shut the door behind herself.

"Hello?" I answered quietly.

"Teal, you're expected to call us when something like that happens."