Love's Reality 【H2OVanoss】

Ch. 18 - Protect

Delirious

I tap my finger against the side of my leg as I watch Vanoss's friends spar as well as the others. I was worried. I wanted to know where Evan was and what Ohm wanted with him. I couldn't focus on the movements of others; just blobs of figures jumping back and forth. I shook my head finally and decided to check on Evan.

As I walk, I'm stopped by one Ohm's men. "Off?" He asks, seemingly nice. I could remember which one this was. Number four-zero-seven. We were allies, you could say at the most, but at the least merely acquaintances. The most I know about him is that we both have the same thoughts about all of this.

"Yeah. You don't mind not telling do you?" I ask, adjusting my hood.

"Didn't see anything. Besides, you have more leeway than most of us. You're Ohm's favorite." He snickered a bit as I shrugged.

"Is that supposed to be a good thing?"

Nothing else was said between us as I started for the halls. I walk past our room, glancing in, then I walk back to see that Evan was in fact there. I step in carefully, when I do though, he jumps and puts his hands out in defense.

"Hey, hey," I put my hands out to give reassurance. "Vanoss it's okay, it's just me. Are you okay?"

Evan didn't say anything, he looked unsure and lost. I don't know what seemed to set him off a bit more, maybe by the way I addressed him. I couldn't say his name verbally, it made my lips tingle.

I approach him slowly as he stares at me with a blank expression. I get close enough to sit on the bottom bunk with him. It creaks and moans as I adjust, the metal screaming.

"Vanoss, what happened?" I pry a bit, reaching for his scarred hand.

"Nothing." Evan finally spoke, but it was very soft and quiet. "I'm fine."

I furrow my eyebrows and squeeze his forearm. "You and I both know that's not the truth."

Evan sighed and placed his hand on his face, pulling on it, and tears escaping his eyes.

"I'm Ohm's assistant... Delirious. Assistant." He emphasized.

I stared at him a bit lost at what he means.

"Oh fuck it." Evan shot up from the bed and swiped the map on the desk to the ground.

"Van-... Evan, I'm not getting what you're saying. Ohm's given you a job?" I stand up too, trying to clam him down and keep my cool. My lips tingled.

"He molested me. I'm his fuck buddy. His way to get off." Evan cried.

My hands got clammy and my mouth went dry. My blood began to heat and boil with rage.

"That twisted..." I trailed off with cuss words and anything so god awful that was him. "Did he hurt you? You don't have to go through this," I kept trying to figure it ways to stop this.

I spat out ideas left and right that only ended in worse situations, until Evan slammed his fist against the crummy desk. "Stop it! Just stop it! Leave!" Evan yelled out, tears streaming down his face.

I couldn't imagine it. It was all my fault. I wasn't there to protect him.
I wasn't there to stop this. I wasn't there to comfort Evan. My head was aching in hard thumps and my hands were hurting from my clenched fists.

I sighed and turned my back to him, heading for the door.

"Wait!" Evan whispered a cry. I froze. "Don't leave... please, I'm sorry."

Evan was hiccuping and his hands were shaking as he tried to calm down, I could feel the fear in his body and the disgust in my own.

"Please stay with me, I can't be alone. I need you."

My lips tingled.

-

Evan fell asleep in my arms that night. No words were said other than the repeating words from earlier. It was a broken record playing in my head. I need you.

I looked up at cracked ceiling. We were getting out, no doubt in that, but the peace and freedom Evan wants once again won't be gained so easily. We are still trapped in this shitty world that used to be a paradise. We are trapped in this shitty world that used to have kind players... players that were sane.

Searching my mind was something I did often on cold nights with no sleep. How on earth have I not gone crazy? Gone apeshit? As much as I wanted the answer to be so difficult and subliminal, it was right next to me. So obvious even a blind man could see it.

I looked at Evan through the holes of my mask. His subtle breathes and soft lips open slightly. He had his hand close to my chest and near his face while the other was close to my hand. I could hold those big hands. I wanted a better look at him so I took off my mask, placing it to the side.

I looked at his cheeks and his lips, the way his eyes fluttered in his sleep, the way his hand twitches every so often. It was beautiful. I moved my hand closer to his and held it, rubbing it with my thumb.

I will protect you, Evan. My sanity.

I never had anyone to care for this much. I've never admired someone like him. I've never felt alive under a single touch. Evan was the only sanity that I has left in this virtual reality hell. I promised him that we would get out of here, but what he doesn't know is that I promised to not only get out of this prison, but get out of this game. Even if after all this when we get out, he won't remember me. I'll always have him in my heart.

I couldn't help but think what it meant to fall in love with someone.

And my lips tingled.

--

Sorry for the short chapter. Decided to give you guys something. I'm so so sorry some of you thought I was discontinuing this book. I am continuing it. A lot of my writing time is very hard to do right now, I've been planning so many things that it's been hectic. So I've been writing, just not stuff like this. I write to keep my creativity flowing. I'm just not motivated and it really sucks. And I'm so sorry.. but thank you so much for the patience.

~Danirious