Strange- Kurt Cobain

Drown

Beverly P.o.V

I woke up feeling crashed, that feeling where everything's dazed, and your eyes feel dry as the fucking African desert. I groaned and walked into the bathroom, taking the makeup off of my face, and leaving my hair how it was.

I got changed into some baggy red plaid sweatpants, and a baggy white t-shirt that said "FUCK OFF" in the front, and "KISS MY ASS" in the back with an arrow pointing towards my ass.

I used my hand to ruffle up my hair, it was a habit, and I didn't care how the fuck I looked in the morning beca-Oh shit, Kurt was here last night. I saw Kurt Cobain last night, I just processed that I actually seen him again. My anxiety kicked in and I started sobbing quietly, it was overwhelming. I couldn't process the fact that he was actually there last night because I was rolling, but now that I'm sober the memories are all rushing back.

His soft low voice, soothing me. His arms holding me, his soft lips, his body. Fuck.

I loved him, I've never stopped, but he hurt me so bad. I believe to this day that he didn't actually love me. I shook all the negative thoughts out of my head. I wiped my tears and grabbed my reading glasses so nobody could see that I'd been crying. I grabbed my bong and my bag of weed and walked downstairs, praying to whoever the fuck that Kurt wasn't down there.

Sure enough, when I got downstairs Kurt was sitting at the kitchen table, Vicky was passed out on the floor. I made sure not to step on her, and not to make eye-contact with Kurt as I sat down on the couch. I felt his eyes on me as I grabbed the remote, set the bong between my thighs, and changed the channel to Beavis and Butthead.

I packed a bowl and sparked up, I took as much as I could, removed the slide and inhaled all the smoke. I held it in as long as I could, but there was a funny part in the show. Beavis called the teacher a hippie faggot and threw a desk in his face.

I started coughing and laughing at the same time. I had to hold a pillow to my mouth so I wouldn't wake Vicky up. Once I finished I set the pillow down and laid back. I closed my eyes, everything felt peaceful and normal until I felt a presence sit next to me. I looked over and on the other end of the couch sat Kurt. He had dark purple-ish hair at the moment and it was hard not to stare at his perfection. I looked back to the screen and took another hit out of my bong.

"Getting over your crash, huh?" He tried to joke. I gave him a look that said 'Fuck off.' He laughed.

I can't believe he was acting like nothing ever happened. "Can't you go bug someone else?" I said and set my bong on the coffee table, grabbing a smoke.

I got annoyed so I went to the kitchen to get a Capri-Sun. When I turned after closing the fridge he was RIGHT there. Like in my personal space. "Leave me alone Kurt!" I whispered shoving him.

He gave me a strained look, "why are you acting like this?" He asked sadly.

"I don't know, maybe because you broke my fucking heart and used me? Or was it that you made me believe that you actually loved me. Hm, I dunno. You can fuckin' choose" I snapped at him.

Something flashed in his eyes that I'd never seen in Kurt before. "You're right, I never loved you. Vicky fucks better anyway, and all the other chicks I've slept with" he seethed, "I bet you haven't slept with anyone."

That broke my heart. "You're right" I stated bluntly.

 I walked out of the kitchen and bumped into Liz, "take my bong upstairs" I told her.

"Where are you going?" She asked curiously. "The liquor store" I replied.

Liz raised an eyebrow, "Okay, um what do you want me to do with that bag of weed."

"Smoke it" I said, "I'll be making a trip to the dealer today or tomorrow."

She nodded and took my bong upstairs. I headed out the door and began walking to the liquor store. I was getting fucked up again tonight. I cannot stand being sober around his ass. I cannot believe he said that to me. Can't fuckin' believe it.

I was so pissed, that I didn't realize I passed the liquor store. I turned around and started walking back down the sidewalk, I looked over and saw a sheet about heroin abuse. It was making my craves itch. The thought of Kurt did that to me. I shook my head and walked inside.

"Hey Bev!" Said the nice old man at the counter, I waved hi and looked around. I bought a bottle of vodka and a bottle of Crown Royal because, why the hell not?

"Thanks for coming!" Said the Old man and once again I waved at him.

As I was walking back I stopped and looked in a puddle, I saw my reflection, I looked like shit. Bags under my eyes, hair a mess, dressed like a hobo, but I didn't fuckin' care. Not one bit.

I kept on walking until I got to my apartment complex, the elevator took ages, and finally I got to my floor. I walked slowly to the door, unlocked it and walked inside. All eyes on me.

"What?" I asked kind of rudely, I hated when people stared at me like that.

Liz looked weary, "Kurt's going to be staying here for the rest of the week or so, you cool with that?" Asked Vicky, giving me a look.

"Whooptyfuckin' doo!" I rolled my eyes, "of course i'm cool with it man, I don't care" I said laughing. Even though I was pissed.

"Damn Lee, you look like hell" joked Liz. 

I laughed, "Yeah, I just got back" I said seriously. Everyone laughed, even Kurt but I bet it was as fony as him.

"Well I'm going to go back to my cave, I'll catch you losers later!" I said throwing up a middle finger behind me as I walked up the stairs.

I heard a chorus of 'see ya Bev' 'Kiss the bottle for me' 'adios!'

I knew I was about to fall into a sea of liquor, and I couldn't fucking wait to drown in it.