I heard Tyler's car before he cruised up next to me. I lifted my head and say the pity in his eyes. I was tired of all this drama in my life. And I didn't appreciate the look my best friend was giving me. When I got into the car I knew the look on his face. But I didn't want to talk to him about Chris. Not right especially when I had just realized my newfound feelings for my Fake Boyfriend. But sadly he was still hung up on his ex.
"Don't ask. Please. I don't want to discuss it okay? Can we just go to the hospital. I want to know how my dad is doing." I saw him nod his head slightly, I appreciated that he listened to me. We drove in silence. I was not up for any type of conversation.
I must have fallen asleep during the drive because I was being shaken slightly.
"Bobbie, wake up we're here." I groaned and yawned. Tyler opened my door wider letting me get out. I saw from the corner of my eye Tyler glancing at me. I knew he thought I would just burst in tears, but I couldn't.
Tyler sighed softly while we walked through the hospital doors. I knew he wanted answers, but I couldn't even think of the facts. When I walked up the nurse to ask if my father was aloud any more visiters I can feel my heart beat thud softly against my rib cage. My palms started to sweat and a knot formed in my throat.
"Hello, is my father-I mean Mr. Kirkque aloud any more visiters? My mother is up there with him, but is it possible for us to go up and see him?" The nurse looked up at me with narrowed eyes. I can tell she wanted to protest, but when she looked back at her computer screen I can see the change of heart. "Yes he is aloud one more visiter at this time." She looked past my shoulder and up at Tyler. He put his hand gently on my arm, "Go ahead and go on. I'll be right here when you get back." I smiled at him weakly. After Tylers comforting words the nurse sent me on my way.
I walked in the hallways quietly. I wasn't sure if I was ready to face him, but he is my father. I also couldn't help but feel guilty. It was my fault he was in here. I didn't notice I had stopped in front of his door until my mother opened it roughly. She took one look at me and pulled me in for a hug,"Oh honey! Your father is recovering well. He's going to be okay." I hugged her back tight. I could feel the tears spreading along my flushed cheeks. I felt my mother shake while she sobbed quietly.
My mother broke the hug first and dragged me into the room. I was numb and relieved. My daddy was pulling through! We sat there in an eerie silence. She held onto my dad's hand. I could see the bags and dark circles underneath her eyes. I was a horrible daughter how could I left her alone. How could I only worry about a relationship that truely didn't exist when my mother was in her own personal hell. I grabbed her free hand and squeezed tightly.
"Honey, I'm sorry." She didn't look at me when she started her apology, "I didn't mean for you to get rid of your baby. That is not something I can force onto you. I still am deeply hurt and disappointed with you, but you are growing up and need to learn to make your own mistakes. To learn right from wrong. No matter how much I would love to take the pain away and do everything for you, I can't." She sighed and hunched her shoulders then straightened her back.
"If you want to keep your baby I will be more supportive and helpful. It's your choice baby." She looked at me this time, tears shining and threatening to spill over. "Oh mom." my lips quivered and the knot grew back,but I pressed on. "I love you and I am truely sorry. I didn't do it on purpose. I should have went to you in the first place. I'm sorry." my voice cracked. She grabbed me into another hug. I could feel the difference in it. I can feel that she was glad that no harm had come to because of Andrew. She was glad that I was still here.
"As for the baby, I'm going to keep it." I can tell she didn't like the answer she got, but I can see she was trying really hard to let me stick to my decision. She nodded her head stiffly. "I'm here for you baby girl." She kissed my forehead then and went back to my father. She sat in the hospital chair sadly. I hated seeing this happen to my family. I kissed my mom on the top of her head and told her I would be coming back a little later, but if I told her if my father woke up before I had got back to call me. She agreed and told me goodbye. When I shut the door to my father's room I went the farther away from Tyler. I remembered where she was from last night.
The numbers 210 on the door screamed at me to leave this instance. My feet glued in front of the door I wanted to go in, but couldn't bring myself to open it.
"She's doing a lot better. Doctors think she won't be in a coma for long, but you never know with coma patients." I jumped slightly and looked to my right. The guy from yesterday stood a good ten feet away from me. His hands in his pockets and his gaze on the floor. I gulped before I answered,"I'm sorry..I am I didn't think it would get this dangerous." He looked at me with melanycholy in his sweet brown eyes. He shook his head as to say I wasn't to blame. "How could have you known that he was a psycho?" He walked closer to me and put his hand on the handle, squeezing his fingers around it tightly. "Do you want to go in and see her? Everyone is in the cafeteria." this boy was giving me the chance to see her and he knew I didn't want to do it with everyone around. I didn't need another confrontation with her best friend. No matter how much I wanted to apologize to her I couldn't do it then. So I shook my head slightly,"I will be back later...is it okay if I come back.." I saw the understanding shining in his eyes. He nodded and opened the door. The soft click of it being closed brought me back to earth.
I made my way back to Tyler and told him to take me back to Chris'. He answered with pursed lips,"Bobbie I don't think that is a good idea." I sighed, I know it wasn't but I needed to make it right, I needed to tell him that my feelings have shifted.
"I know, but I need to." he gave a little frustrated groan, but obeyed me nonetheless. When we showed up at the apartment complex I felt my short lived bravery waver. I wasn't so sure I wanted to go through with it. My heart pounded with anxiety. What if he won't see me. He hasn't tried to contact me at all. And by now he would have apologized or said something. When Tyler parked I could tell he saw through my facade. When I was ready to step out of the car something or rather someone made me stop my actions all together. In front of Tyler and me was Chris and his ex-girlfriend.
Darla. He was with Darla, My throat constricted. He really was just being nice to me, He still loved her. I scoffed inwardly, I was stupid to think he might like me just a smidge. Tyler followed my gaze and immediately turned on the car. He mumbled under his breathe. How stupid Chris was. How he was an idiot to let me go so easily. Chris and Darla hadn't gone inside the apartment yet and when we drove past Chris's eyes looked into mine. If he knew it was me he didn't make it known. He continued to let Darla inside.
I turned my eyes away from the apartment and tried to focus on anything else. "Bobbie, I am sorry. He is an idiot. He lost out not you." I didn't reply because I was afraid I might burst into another round of tears and quite frankly I was tired of crying. He took my silence as a reassurance to keep going, "Bobbie, I know this is a bad time. Actually its the worst time, but you need to know....I like you Bobbie." I was speechless. I looked at Tyler with wide eyes. My crush had just admitted to having feelings for me.
"I know that I should have told you sooner, but I didn't.." he trailed off after that just thinking. I knew what he was going to say, he didn't think he had competition. He thought he had all the time in the world to tell me.
"I just..I didn't realize my feelings until after. I couldn't understand why it irked me so when I saw you with HIM." he shook his head in disgust. I could tell he was battling with himself and his feelings. He didn't want to tell me about his new found feelings for me just yet, but he felt that this was his chance. His only chance because was out of the picture.
"I know I haven't been a great friend lately. But I don't just want to be your friend anymore Bobbie. I don't think I can do that just yet. I know it is bad timing but can you at least tell me when you are fully ready you will give me a chance. A chance to prove to you that you deserve something great?" He glanced at me sideways, His adams apple bobbed nervously. I didn't know to react or feel. It was so overwhelming for me.
Tyler was truely being genuine. I knew without a single doubt that he would wait for me. He would keep his word. And this was the shinning moment I have been waiting for hasn't it?
I grabbed his hand in mine and tightly held it. He smiled at me, he knew that when I felt better that I would give us a try. But why didn't it feel right?
