Faded Away || Jeon Jungkook

(19)

I love you and I swear I do

|| 

It was a quiet ride back to the home that Miyun owned. It was no surprise that Jungkook was the one who was driving. With the state Miyun was in nobody would've allowed her too anyways. 

There was no doubt about it, that out of all of them Miyun had taken it the hardest. The other boys were heart broken. They had cried for a long time before finally deciding on who was going to drive them home. 

Jungkook didn't even want to think about them at the moment, knowing that Miyun was upset. He didn't know what had gone down between the two of them, or why Miyun had walked out so calmly. 

It almost scared him how calm she was when she walked out. There wasn't a hint of shakiness in her step, but that was what made Jungkook decide it was safer for him to drive. There was no way anybody would let her in the front seat of a vehicle at this time. 

"We need to go to the lab." Miyun spoke calmly. There wasn't anything in her voice that changed as the words left her mouth, but Jungkook wasn't ready to argue. There was something in him that knew what was coming. 

He wasn't completely sad about it though. He understood why it was going to happen. Because Miyun had realized what had been going on all along and now it was time for him to go. Jungkook was almost relieved in a way. 

The guilt of not being able to save Yoongi was already starting to build up in him and he wasn't able to let it go. He had been programmed with over a million different procedures, and not one would've been able to save Yoongi's life. 

There was also the fact that he had realized he had come to disappoint everyone. They all had high expectations for him, and he had failed them. 

There was no sound, no music, not even their breathing could be heard as Jungkook pulled into the closest parking space. He had no idea what was going though Miyun's mind at the moment, and he didn't really care. 

At any other point in his existence, he would have been all for being able to help out and make her feel better. He would have signed the first spot on the train to happiness if it meant seeing her smile. But he knew at this point that the only way of doing that was to disappear. 

He was causing pain for everyone at this point, and it was a hard fact to run from. He wanted to hide from it and pretend that it didn't bug him. That he would still be able to help out in hospitals like he was programmed to. 

But the thought of losing Yoongi made all of those thoughts come to a halt. His first try and he had just made everything worse for everyone. 

It didn't even faze him as he opened the door and stepped out into the freezing air. There wasn't a single thought about how his machinery would freeze up, but instead of how he had seen Yoongi bleeding out on the table, and he wasn't able to help. 

"Do you still have the chip?" The question came from Miyun as she pushed open the door and walked inside. The warmth filled Jungkook and he walked over to the desk where they always worked. 

There he pulled out a small drawer and pulled out the small chip that he and Miyun had spent so much time on together. They had tried to make it complete, but now he couldn't even think of finishing it. He couldn't think about how it would feel to know more about Yoongi than he already did. 

He placed the chip gently into Miyun's hand and she stared down at it. There was a curiosity in her eyes as she lifted it between her forefinger and thumb, looking at it in the light. The sound of it snapping suddenly between her fingers didn't bother either of them.