I Will NOT, Can NOT fall in LOVE with the Hot/Player/Jerk of a bestfriend!

I will NOT, Can NOT fall in LOVE with the Hot/Player/Jerk of a best friend[13]

should talk to him or not. I finally gave in.

Clarissa Marie Evenson:'Hey'

Josh Mathews: 'Hey?'

Clarissa Marie Evenson: 'What's up?'

Josh Mathews: 'Why are you even talking to me? Have you decided yet?'

Clarissa Marie Evenson: 'No, but I still want to talk to you'

Staring at the screen, my heart pounding for his reply. 'You're never because of Josh, this means you should be with HIM, not Jay V!'said the Josh in me. 'Oh shut it!'said Jay V in me.

Josh Mathews: 'Why do you want to talk to me? Are you choosing HIM?'

Was I? I want to talk to Josh, I want to hear his voice, and I want him to be next to me.

Clarissa Marie Evenson: ' brb' Logging off I sat there thinking. What if Jay V never kissed me? Will he still say he loves me? If he said he loves me when did he start? If we didn't kiss would I still

have to decide? Would Jay V still have confessed??? These question I needed to know. Closing my eyes, letting images of Jay V flow through my head I felt myself smiling. Opening my eyes I

saw my reflection from the mirror, my face was filled with happiness, and warmth. Looking down, I felt bad. Josh trust me for not hurting him, yet I am hurting him. I'm just like Rose. Taking a

deep breath and closing my eyes I let images of Josh run through. When he's smiling, when we went to eat ice cream, when someone took a picture of us at school(we were alone under a tree),

I felt myself smile and my eyes watering.The expression Josh gave me, when I accused him of getting to Rose through me, his expression when I had thought he was worse than Jay V with girls,

he's expression appalled that I thought he wanted sex. All because of Jay V, my world was like this. I didn't want to give up Josh, but I didn't want to give up Jay V either. Walking out and down

the stairs I stopped at the piano I've neglected for months. Opening the cover, I ran my fingers along the keys testing the pitch. Still perfect. Closing my eyes I begun to play a song I wrote

Journey:

It's a long long journey

Till I know where I'm supposed to be

It's a long long journey

And I don't know if I can believe

When shadows fall and block my eyes

I am lost and know that I must hide

It's a long long journey

Till I find my way home to you

Many days I've spent

Drifting on through empty shores

Wondering what's my purpose

Wondering how to make me strong

I know I will falter I know I will cry

I know you'll be standing by my side

It's a long long journey

And I need to be close to you

Sometimes it feels no one understands

I don't even know why

I do the things I do

When pride builds me up till I can't see my soul

Will you break down these walls and pull me through

Cause It's a long long journey

Till I feel that I am worth the price

You paid for me on calvary

Beneath those stormy skies

When Satan mocks and friends turn to foes

It feel like everything is out to make me lose control

It's a long long journey

Till I find my way home to you.to you

There was only one face I saw while singing this song in my normal voice. After much thought, I finally made my choice. Even though it was fast simple, and I hoped I was making the right

choice. I walked out of my room and headed towards Jay V's house.

------------------------------------------------------

Heyy! I FINALLY UPLOADED!! :D

Ok u guys mad???

:P

too baaadddd :P

I love this song and I think it fits this story ;)

Ok b4 u go all crazy from the singer, she is from Taiwan and most of her songs r in Mandarin. Only a few songs r in English! :)

This is one of my favs! :D

I LOVE Angela!!!

Name: Angela Zhang

:)

I'll be posting whenever again, but dont wrry u wont wait long ! :D

bye 4 now!

PEACE

LOVE

TWILIGHT

~Tiffany