Another kind of joke (Jokers daughter story)

Chapter 36: The Mess We'll Make of Each Other

Sierra and Whitney were adamant on finding the perfect dress, so we made plans to meet for lunch and begin our search. I park my car, pay the parking meter, and begin walking toward the cafe.

"Hey! Wait, Lucy!" I turn around towards the familiar voice. Upon making eye contact I'm filled with dread.

"What are you doing here?"

"Why the hell do you think I'm here?"

"Vince, I have no idea what you're talking about. Are you okay?"

"Am I okay?" He scoffs, "Are you fucking kidding? I know what you did."

I frown silently as he pulls out a copy of the Gotham Gazette and practically shoves it into my face.

"You know that I... got engaged?"

"No, this," he points to one of the pictures, of Damian, the twins, and I. "We both know that they aren't his."

"What the hell is wrong with you? Are you mad because I left you for someone that doesn't treat me like shit?" I get in his face and push him back slightly. "Damian and I have kids, get over it you asshole. Take a look at the damn birth certificates if you want."

"Actually I'd like a paternity test, and I'm willing to go to court if necessary."

"Fuck off."

"I'll see you in court."

Now I'm running to the cafe, holding back tears, and tripping over myself. Sierra and Whitney see me and without saying a word they embrace me.

"Vince...he's..." I sob, struggling to catch my breath. "he's here."

We never did get lunch, there was too much ugly crying happening. We just went home.

Just an hour later...

Rule number one, weddings are a waste of time and money, so don't have one. Instead just elope and get drunk with people you trust. That's what I told Damian when he asked what I wanted to do for a ceremony. But according to Damian, "we must compromise, especially now that we're committed". Then I told him, "having a wedding is a major deal breaker. I'm being absolutely serious right now." That made him shut up faster than you could say 'boy wonder'.

Selina Wayne was still pushing for a real wedding, Bruce agreed with whatever she said about it, and Sierra didn't care what happened as long as there was free booze. My cousins felt "neutral" about it all, my father sent me a letter asking if he would be invited to the wedding, when I didn't respond he sent another letter, demanding that I send him an invitation, I threw that letter away too. Of course I invited my aunt because she was like a mother to me, but then it became time to decide whether or not to invite my actual mom. After much consideration I decided I would invite her and hope for the best.

Damian and I went to see a variety of different locations before deciding that a hotel was too impersonal and that a church was religiously overwhelming. So Bruce and Selina offered Wayne manor, which was perfect. .

I was incredibly stressed, not just from wedding planning, but also from having two toddlers making a mess in a house too big for its inhabitants and a sassy fiance to match accordingly. So in absolute desperation, I called the only one capable of  helping me balance everything. Sierra. If only she had the decency to pick up the phone after the first or third call. Eventually she did though, "H-hello?" She sounded like she'd been buried alive and had finally found her way out, her voice was raspy and half there. "Sierra? Are you sober, or no?"

It took her a moment to gather whatever thoughts she might be having and she replied in that same voice, "Well I'm sober now, I just don't look much like it." I could hear her crawling out of bed and making her way across the wood floor room, with heavy, exhausted steps.

"Maybe I should just call back later when you're in a better state." This time she didn't miss a beat and was quick to respond. "No, no, no! You've already called me, woken me up, and obviously have something urgent to tell me, considering all the missed calls I have." I sighed prior to responding. "Listen, I know you've been wanting to do this, and I told you o because I wanted to handle ti on my own... but I really do need your help now. Will you please be my maid of honor and help me plan the wedding?" In an instant she seemed much more aware, "YES YES YES! Of course! You're my best friend I would do anything for you, I'll head over to your place right now!" The called abruptly ended and I was brought back to what I had been doing, trying to get scribbles in crayon off the walls.

As I was finishing up, well giving up that is, the bell rang maybe six or seven times. In true Sierra fashion, she let herself in with her own personal key, even though she'd already gone to the fuss of ringing the bell several times. She hugged me and released me after a moment  or two. "I've missed you so much! Now where are my nieces, we need flower girl dresses, and cake samples!" I rolled my eyes. "First of all, I already got my dress, and the twins have mini ones modeled after mine, and secondly, please tell me you didn't already make a ton of calls on the way over." She smiled widely, "Of course I did! I just have to call my m-"
"You are not calling your mom! She'll take over the entire process! I want my best friend to help me plan my wedding, not her mom. Especially since she's my future mother in law, that's just weird." Sierra shook her head, and I could already feel argumentative energy bursting through her eyes like a wildfire. "Lucy, mothers always help with planning weddings, it's like a traditional thing! Obviously your mom isn't going to help, because she's.. Ya know... crazy, kinda. Anyway, Selina loves you! She almost likes you more than me, and that means a lot because I'm definitely her second favorite." She knew I wasn't convinced so she put off the call, but I knew as soon as she left my side she would be making that call. "Let's just go get some cake. It'll keep the twins occupied at least."

-I truly apologize for this very late update! But now I know that direction this story is taking, so please stick with my story and enjoy!-