Lips Of An Angel

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Nate

The sound of a baby crying pulled me from the task I was supposed to be doing -- piles of paperwork and requests that had littered my desk for weeks. I had hidden away in my office in an attempt to get something done. So far, I was obviously failing. My mind hadn't really been where it was supposed to be in quite some time. I had been focused on something else entirely, and it was starting to show. Not only did Amber see it, so did my second and third in command, though they didn't have the balls to call me out for it. Amber was fearless in her accusations, though they were more along the lines of pointing out the obvious than anything.

"It's her isn't it?" The sneer on her lips would distort the beauty the Goddess had Blessed her with.  "How is it, oh fearless alpha, that one sniveling female has you so disjointed? That bitch isn't your mate anymore! You're stuck with me and that fucking brat I gave birth to." I wanted to demand blood for the disrespect of my true mate, but what was the point? She wasn't telling me anything I didn't know already. Tora wasn't mine any longer, I was stuck with Amber. And because of a decision I had made so long ago, I had not only cursed myself with a power hungry mate, but my Pack -- my people. They no longer held me in a high regard, no longer embraced every decision I made without question. It wasn't just Amber who was the enemy, it was both of us. I was now unwelcome in most of their homes, not invited to most events, and I couldn't blame them. Other Packs no longer wanted to do business with us, to be allies. They'd heard of my infidelity, my offense against the Goddess. They also knew of Amber's lack of respect for anyone other than herself. The Shadow Mountain Pack was the most recent to cut ties, citing a morality clause; they were our largest supplier of medical supplies and knowledge. Amber had offended their Alpha by insinuating he had wandering eyes, then had the audacity to invite him into her room while I was away from the table.

I felt that this was the beginning of the end of my Pack.

More wails from a pup sounded through the hall, breaching the thick wooden door to my office and I was struck with an image, one that had my insides all but melting.

Our connection had been severed for years now, but sometimes the Goddess felt it appropriate to show me memories and moments from Tora's life. It was Her wrath, her punishment for what I had done.

She was bent over a toilet, retching everything she'd likely eaten that day. Her dark hair held away from the mess collecting in the bowl. Tears gliding down her face as she coughed and pulled backed wiping her pale cheeks absently. One large hand appeared and soothed her back while the other placed a cloth against her flushed skin, an all too familiar voice murmuring praises and assurances to her.

"You're okay, baby. You didn't ruin anything." He promised, his voice ringing with truth. It took a second for me to notice that Tora was nude save for a towel and I had no doubt of what they had been up to, especially since Sean wasn't wearing a single thread of clothing himself.

"But it's our anniversary and I can't - we can't- I'm sorry." She cried, her eyes growing misty with tears and regret. Her small hands pushed into her curls, the glint of her wedding bands caught under the fluorescent light, and her thick curtain of hair moved revealing the healed over Mark. Jealousy swirled dangerously in my gut, but I knew there was nothing I could do about it.

Sean was silent for a moment and I felt a sting of satisfaction when I thought he had no idea how to comfort her. He was her supposed best friend before their marriage, and yet he couldn't make her feel better? But that smug satisfaction died quickly when he placed a hand on her abdomen through the towel covering her.

"Tor, you've given me everything I could ask for and more. You're my best friend, my Luna, my wife and the mother of my child. If we have to hold out on certain activities in order to keep you from getting sick, so be it. All I need is you."

I couldn't describe the pain, the torment, the pure agony of knowing that my Mate was giving another man a child. I had gone through this once, the incident with Slater.

You mean where you slaughtered her unborn child in a fit of rage, Nate? Niko hissed at me, awakening from his almost eternal slumber for the first time in years. I wanted to tell him that he had part in that too, but he had only surfaced in an attempt to try to restrain me. Smelling Tora in that house, her intoxicating scent had weaved a map to her, and I couldn't help myself.

But she had opened the bathroom door, wearing a babydoll dress that accentuated the small bump of her belly, her cheeks flush with heat and glow, like so many women carried when pregnant. Her scent had mingled with Slater's, the scent burning in my nose.

It hadn't registered at first, the sight of her slightly round belly. And once it had I couldn't hold back.

I remember fighting with Niko, trying to  push him away as a dark need rose inside of me. The only thing I remembered during all of this was the taste of her metallic blood on my tongue as it flooded my mouth in gulps.

My mind was carried back to the vision of Tora and Sean, but it began to die -- cutting me out of their intimate moment slowly.

Numbness overtook my body at the same time the exhaustion did, and briefly as I closed my eyes and laid my head against the desk, I wondered if the Goddess would ever stop torturing me for what I had done.

But I knew I deserved it.

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