Daryl had seen that every day passed chipped a little away from Carl. Little by little, he was finding it harder to keep himself going. He had been there when Negan had presented that box, wrapped neatly with its intent in shattering what was left of Carl's soul. He had felt a deep disappointment in himself that moment. He had failed her.
His arm had prevented from doing much for the past week. The pain had marginally subsided, but it never bothered him anyway. He had still gone out day after day, following tracks to the bitter end of nothing.
It cut him deep down, that feeling that he couldn't do anything. He was Daryl, he needed to help. He needed to save the only family he had left on that godforsaken Earth. He had let her fall to deep, get too tangled up in the world of being responsible for everyone else.
He knew that she needed to be saved too.
He was the older cousin, the person that was supposed to protect her. He hadn't protected her when it all broke out, she had found him, after she had been through too much pain. He hadn't been there to fight most of the people she had come up against. He was there with Negan. He watched as she was ripped from everything she cared about. He watched as she was taken away. Had Negan killed her already? Or had he done worse?
Greenview had fallen into a dark pit of disrepair. It seemed like everyone had given up, either clinging onto anger or ignorence. The once proud and very-much-together group had divided, people seeming to keep to themselves. Daryl had spent his time alone. Carol had tried to engage with him, but she knew that he needed his time to process everything. To process his guilt.
He was finished now, and he needed to do something to help Lauren. Like she would for him, or anyone.
He looked up, the rest of the Survivors scattered across the dimly lit lobby. Michonne with Rick, who hadn't been the same in days. Maggie had tried to pull everyone back together, but she had been unable to replace Lauren. She was the only one people looked up to.
In her meagre seventeen years, Lauren had made more of a difference he could ever hope to achieve in his life. He loved her for it.
Now he needed to repay the favour.
"Is anyone going to do anythin'?" Daryl grunted, standing up onto his two feet, "Are we going to sit here scratching our balls for the rest of our lives?"
Rick locked his jaw and lifted his head to meet Daryl's gaze.
"What do you expect us to do?" He replied, his tone exasperated. Like Rick had already given up his resolve, "There are more of them, and far too-"
"What about her?" Daryl raised his voice, anger and irritation laced between each syllable. He was done sitting around. Done with feeling sorry for himself. There was a girl out there, a girl that had sacrificed enough for everyone else, his own blood, locked away somewhere, "After all she's done, we're gonna' abandon her?"
Rick didn't reply, and the silence hung thickly in the air. Carl locked eyes with the older man, and the slightest weak smile of appreciation turned the corners of his lips upward.
"She could be dead already," Daryl bit out the words that almost caught themselves in his throat. He didn't feel much for anyone, but Lauren, she was always an exception, "That is on our heads. Everythin' she's done is for the good of all of us. And here we are while she's suffering."
Silence.
"She would die twenty times over for each of us," His voice was much lower, much calmer. The words stung his heart. "What have we done for her?"
Rick's eyes met Daryl's, and the redneck spoke first.
"If you won't do it for her," He said, "Do it for your son."
Carl had squeezed his eyes shut, the pain he felt too much for him to bare. Rick saw the look in his son's eye and he nodded his head, standing up from his seat. He was followed by every other member of the origional group, and those friends they had made while at Greenview. Every person that had faced Negan stood before him, prepared to do it again.
"I know ye' all think that she was the leader. That this was her wrongdoing. That she failed us. But we're a team, and she's the one taking the punishment," Daryl shook his head, guilt churning inside of his gut, "The truth is, we failed her."
~•~
Beautiful mind
Your heart got a story with mine
Your heart got me hurting at times
Your heart gave me new kind of highs
Your heart got me feeling so fine
So what to do
Still falling for you
Still falling for you
It took us a while
With every breath a new day
With love on the line
We've had our share of mistakes
But all your flaws and scars are mine
Still falling for you
Still falling for you
Ellie Goulding - Still Falling For You
~•~
Carl sat atop the roof of Greenview, yet another evening ticking to a close. He found it hard to keep going, to keep fighting when an outcome was so far away. He prayed that Georgina was out there somewhere. He hoped that she had found the Saviors' base, and that she had found Lauren. He was bound to Greenview, even if he left he wouldn't know the first place to start looking for Lauren. If he found her? Would he even be able to save her?
Negan's words hadn't left his mind in days.
She's alive. Barely.
He didn't want to submit to the horrifying thoughts that came to the forefront of his mind. It hurt far too much. Each thought was like someone was dismantling him seam by seam, unraveling his fragile heart until it fell to nothing at his feet.
Carl didn't wear his emotions, he didn't feel much at all. But her, she made him whole. It didn't matter how broken he was, she would always hold those little pieces of him into place. He loved her.
She just wont be.. How do I phrase it? Lauren.
He realised just how much he loved her, how much her life meant to him. He would tear down the world for her, all she need to was ask.
He remembered the little things in their lives together, how they grew up. They shaped eachother into the people they became. Never in those years did they stop loving eachother. That love only grew stronger with each passing day. They had so many downs, and even more ups. Somehow, they always found eachother. No anger could break them. All he had to do was look into her eyes, and he knew, just what mattered most.
He could see the stars shining down on him, their light dimmed as his was gone. He could see the dark treetops, the roads that lead into blackness. She was out there somewhere. She was under the same stars, possibly thinking the same thoughts. He'd see her again, he wouldn't stop fighting until he did.
All his scars would mean nothing without her.
"I love you."
He imagined her sweet melodic voice. He let it warm him, let her memory stop him from slipping off the edge. She'd tell him how sitting on the roof made her feel alive. He closed his eyes, and let her fill his heart.
I love you more.
~•~
Daryl/Carl chap!
Few chapters until a big one ;)
Let's hope Gina can save Lauren, ayyyy ;)
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Forever Broken // Carl Grimes
Fanfiction"We're playing a dangerous game." | Book Three of the 'Forever' series | - Forever Alone // Carl Grimes - Forever Unfinished // Carl Grimes ~•~ She was slipping, falling, plummeting into the darkness with nobody to catch her. Nobody to hold that net...
