Emison one shots

Sometimes i forget

This ones kinda sad, I'm just depressed sorry guys☹️ takes place season 6, Paige never left for California sadly😂

Alison's pov
I watch them. I watch them laugh, hug, kiss. Sometimes I even see the way Paige looks at her when she's not looking; with full admiration, it's the way I look at her too. I see the way Emily lightly smiles at her, but it's not her smile. Paige loves her but I know Emily doesn't love her back, at least not the way she loved me. I know I shouldn't care anymore, but I rescued her! I risked my life to save her from that God awful place that I don't even wanna think about. I know it's selfish of me but sometimes I forget I'm not the same girl I was years ago. Sometimes I forget Emily's not the same girl she used to be either. The old me would've thrown it in her face; how I saved her and all, it would've been a constant reminder. The old me would've never let her be with Paige, the old me would've made up some plot to keep Paige away from her. But that's not me anymore, I'm not that girl anymore. Emily's happiness is all I want, and if Paige makes her happy then who am I to deprive her of that? Who the hell am I to take that away from her? Maybe she doesn't love Paige like she loved me, but all I did was hurt her anyway. So all I can do is watch them. Watch what I could've had, because sometimes I forget she's different now, and so am I. I guess that's what's best for us, and what's best for us isn't always what we want. "Ali are you alright?" I heard my best friend Spencer ask as she snapped me out of my thoughts. "I'm fine." I lied and she gave me a skeptical look, "You've been staring at Emily and Paige for half an hour. We're supposed to be enjoying our "A" free day at the lake." She reminded me as I sighed. "I know, I'm sorry." I said looking down at my knees, "Don't apologize, what's wrong?" She asked asked curiously. "I know we're all on good terms now and I love that, I also know things just can't go back to the way they used to be and trust me that's more than fine with me. But I just-" I tried to find the worlds but I couldn't, "I just miss some stuff." I admitted as she furrowed her eyebrows. "And I'm not talking like back when I was a manipulative bitch, I'm talking like before I was a convicted murder." I said trying to joke as she gave me a look, "Define "some"." She said and I sighed, I kept my eyes glued to my knees. "I miss Emily." I admitted, "She's right over there Ali." Spencer said and I looked up at her for a minute. "No Spence, I mean I miss Emily. I miss kissing her, I miss waking up next to her." I said as I looked down again, "I miss when she loved me." I admitted quietly. "O-oh, oh god Ali I didn't realize that you had real feelings for her in that way." She said truthfully and I sighed, "That was one of the few things I didn't lie about Spence. When I came back and I told her those kisses weren't for practice, when we kissed, it was- it was real." I said looking at her as she stared at me intensely. "God when we kissed that night in bedroom, it felt so right. It was one of the very few moments that I've felt okay ever since I've been back. That's how Emily's always made me feel; okay. No matter what I'm going through, she's always been able to make me feel okay." I told her truthfully as she stared at me. "Why are you telling me this?" She asked as I furrowed my eyebrows, "I thought you wanted to know." I said as she shook her head. "I mean why are you telling me this, when you should be telling her this." She said looking at Emily as I turned my head to see Emily staring admiringly at the water. She was sitting on the dock and had her feet in, she stared at the water like it was one of the most amazing things she's ever seen. "She's with Paige. She's with Paige and she's happy." I said reminding myself but also Spencer, "She loves you more than she'll ever love her you know?" She asked as I looked at her intensely. "I know." I said truthfully because I do know. I know that Emily will never love Paige like she loves me, but that doesn't mean I'm good for her. "Then why don't you tell her how you feel? The truth." Spencer said as I sighed, "Because it's too late for us Spencer, I had my chance, I can't fix what the damage I did, the damage I always do." I said looking down as she looked at me. "So that's it? You're just gonna give up?" I heard my best friend Hanna asked as I turned around and her and Aria were standing behind me. "How long were you guys listening?" I asked as they both sat down next to me and Spencer, "Basically all of it." Aria said as I sighed and rolled my eyes. "That's not the point, you can't just give up on Emily." Hanna said as I looked down. "I'm not giving up guys, I'm letting her go." I said as I felt tears burn in the rim of my eyes.