If Sheets Could Talk

Chapter 6

My mind is still blown that Meghan is pregnant. I know for a FACT, Brice not going to leave her now. Brice has a great heart; I know he not gon leave his pregnant girlfriend for her best friend/business partner. That's just not gon happen. As much as I wish this wasn't happening right now, it ain't nothing I could do about it. Meghan called me like 4 times already. I know she wanna tell me the "good news", I just can't take it right now. I know ill have to eventually talk to her. Brice texted trying to see if I was ok. Honestly, im not ok at all. I have to suck it up and pretend like im ok with everything. This is really killing me inside. The fact Meghan is pregnant for a fact and there's a possibility that im pregnant too. Like, how im going to explain this to people? I'm going to stop stressing it and just go with the flow. Meghan called for the 5th time today. I know I can't avoid her forever. I told her I would just see her at the shop. I said that because I can easily get the girls to interrupt us at any time. I really don't wanna talk about it or hear it but I know I have to. Hey Zayna! Good morning Chyna! You ok today? Got a lot on my mind but ill be ok. Somebody is in a good mood, Chyna said. Who? Meghan, she came in all smiley and what not. Brought donuts and coffee for everybody. Has she said why? No, she just said she was going to tell all of us once you got here. You know what it is? No, she hasn't told me anything. Since you're here, guess we'll all find out. Z, im glad you're here. I have a special, special announcement to make. I am 6 weeks pregnant! Everybody started clapping and giving Meghan a hug. I stood there with the fakest smile ever. I wanna be happy for her but my heart won't let me. Congratulations, I said then walking to my office. I could tell Meghan sensed my uncomfortableness by the way I rushed off. You ok today? I'm fine, I said. You didn't seem too happy for me, Meghan said. I said congratulations, what else you want me to say? I just expected you to be happier for me, that's all. How happy you want me to be Meghan? I just expected a better reaction from you. This is our place of business; we have clients out there. You know we don't normally discuss personal business in front of clients or our staff. I just wanted to share my good news with my best friend and my work family. How far along are you? 6 weeks. How does Brice feel about it? He didn't seem too happy honestly. That kind of threw me for a loop. What was his reaction? He was shocked and speechless. I went to his job and told him. Why there? I was leaving the doctor and I wanted to catch him while he was on break. I tried talking about it when he got off but he really didn't wanna talk about it. Why not? I'm not sure really, I don't wanna keep pressuring him to talk about it if he doesn't want to. I think it's too much for him. While Meghan was talking, Brice texted saying he needed to see me. I didn't respond, I just ignored it. A few minutes later, he texted saying he was at my apartment waiting on me. I have to go check on my mother, I said to Meghan. How is she? She's better, I didn't get a chance to see her yesterday. She was sleep by the time I made it there. Ok, let me know how she's doing.

What are you doing here? Baby, I really needed to talk to you. I know you're mad at me, Brice said while grabbing my hand. I'm not mad at you. I just feel like you are and I don't blame you. I told you im not mad. It's a lot on my mind right now, Brice said. I could tell something was really bothering him. He sat on the couch and put his hands over his face. When he did that, I knew it was something serious. What's wrong? I'm so confused about how I feel right now. Talk to me, I said while rubbing Brice's arm. You know what Meghan and I been through over the last few years. She's been pregnant 3 times and each time she lost it. What if it happens again? My heart can't take losing another child. Meghan and Brice were together for 3 months and she got pregnant. Brice was ready for kids but Meghan wasn't. She felt it was best if she got an abortion. A year later, she got pregnant again. They were in a better place and thought they both were ready. Meghan ended up having a miscarriage when she was only 3 weeks pregnant. It was really rough on the both of them. A few months later, she got pregnant again. Around the time she got pregnant, she had lost her dad due to cancer. Shortly after losing him, she had another miscarriage. Probably a year later, she was pregnant again. She just knew this time was going to be different. She kept referring to her baby as a magic baby. Third times the charm and Meghan really believed it was. She was 5 months pregnant and just found out they were having a boy. They were leaving the doctor when a truck came out of nowhere and hit them. Meghan was fighting for both of their lives. Unfortunately, only one of them could survive. The doctor gave Brice the choice to make the decision who was going to live. Y'all pretty much know the rest from there. Now Meghan is pregnant for the 4th time. I can definitely see why Brice is nervous right now. After losing 3 kids before they even make it on earth, that can be enough to make anybody lose it.

I keep thinking like what if both of y'all are pregnant. What if Meghan loses this baby too? What if you have my baby and Meghan doesn't? What if both of y'all lose the baby? Wait, let's not jinx the situation. I need you to calm down and relax. I know this is a lot to take in right now. Trust me, im having a hard time processing all of this too. I know if I tell Meghan you're pregnant by me, it's going to crush her. She gon lose the baby for real. Would you stop talking about losing babies? I need you to be positive right now. You being negative and it's not helping none of us. I'm not trying to be, Brice said. Every time I get excited about being a father, it gets ripped from me. Can you imagine losing 3 kids? No, I don't know how it feels but I do know one thing. What's that? Everything happens for a reason baby. Maybe y'all are not meant to have kids with each other. Maybe Meghan is not the woman that's meant to have your kids. I'm not saying im the woman that's meant to have your kids but there is a possibility Meghan just not meant to have kids' period. When I saw my son, I couldn't help but smile. Seeing him all balled up, hearing his heartbeat, seeing him move gave me so much joy. I was ready to buy footballs, ready to teach him how to be a man, ready to give him the father I never had. I remember Meghan looking at me and saying I was going to be the best father in the world. At that very moment, I knew she was going to be the woman I was going to marry. I was hurt and uncomfortable listening to Brice but I knew he needed to vent. I couldn't wait to see Brice Xavier Landan. I don't know what happened, Brice said. I was at a point where I was ready to propose to Meghan. I was ready to turn our love into an eternity. I had a threesome thinking it was going to be fun and something new. I didn't know I was going to fall in love with my girlfriend's best friend and business partner. I'm so torn right now I don't know what to do. Just do what your heart is telling you to do. My heart is telling me to be with the woman I love, which is you. My conscience is telling me to not leave my girlfriend of 5 years. We been through so much, leaving her is going to be the hardest thing I ever had to do. Brice im not forcing you to anything you don't wanna do. If you wanna be a better man for Meghan, do that. I'm not making you choose me or continue to sleep with me. If you're this torn, it's best if we just end this. What? Brice I love you, I really do. For the last year, I have been nothing but faithful to you. I've excepted the fact im sharing you with someone else. I'm basically the other woman and that ain't no good feeling. To know the man I love, the man I been in love with for the last year has someone else pregnant, hurts. To know you sleep with her every night, that shit kills me. Watching her gloat about being pregnant was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I had to sit there and act like im happy. I had to hide the fact I was jealous and hurting. I knew with everything y'all been through, leaving her wasn't going to be easy. Now that she's pregnant again, you really not going to leave her. I just have to except the fact you'll never be mine and we'll never be. If I am pregnant, I can take care of this baby on my own. I don't care what you say, im going to be here for you and my child. Nothing is going to stop me from being a father, nothing. Yes, with Meghan being pregnant again it's making this a lot harder for me. That's why I said we can end this. Be a better man to her and for y'all child. Yeah it was hurting me to say this to Brice but I know I had to say it. It's time I face the truth and that truth is, he's never going to leave her for me. This whole time we were messing around, I knew eventually he was going to leave her. I believed him when he promised me that and I believe that he loves me. I could have possibly ruined my friendship for nothing. At first I felt like it was worth it. What Brice and I have is special. Although we can't spend real time together, can't go places together, can't spend the night together like that I know our love for each other is real.

I don't want us to end like this, Brice said. I don't either but don't really have a choice. Regardless of what happens, I will always love you. If you are pregnant, I will be here for you and my child. I know you will. One last kiss, Brice asked? Of course! I didn't wanna face the fact im letting go of someone I really love. Brice is the only man I ever really loved. I swear I didn't wanna end this kiss. I felt tears running down Brice's face. This is really hard for the both of us.