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I backed up so it was unnoticeable, until I hit the wall. I didn't want to see Darry's wrath. I must have been white or something cause Darry stopped. It was at that time I noticed how much in was shaking and how close I was to bawling even though I was crying. Soda was studying me.

Never ever have I been cornered by anyone in the gang or my family. Sure they were mad at me from time to time, but never was I attacked or threatened or cornered. I was scared. I dunno who was worse. Darry or Dally. But I was gonna find out soon enough.

Darry sighed and I saw....pity! I was like a puppy. I'm happy and stuff till I'm cornered and scared. Even dogs have secrets. Like getting into trash and stuff. Mine was prison.

The gang was in a daze. They all stared at me. I was helpless. But that didn't help my crying thing. Don't cry. Don't cry. Do not cry. Soda looked concerned.
"St...stay away from m..m..me." I stuttered. Everyone was a traitor! Everyone! Darry, about to hit me. Soda. Watching. Pony. Who started this. The gang. They watched. Socs. They hurt us. Middle class who didn't care! Mom who left. Dad. They all betrayed me. I remember my mom's promise.
Years back---------------------------------
"Hey mommy, never leave. You too daddy." They both chuckled.
"We'll try, baby flower." That was a nick name.
LIES! YOU LIED!" I felt so much betrayal that day. From that day on, life was a live and survive thing. No care. No love. I love you guys.
Back in reality----------------------------
I realized what being without my brothers has done to me. And how I'm hurting our love. Being in the gang has threatened me. I realize that. Having Pony around has threatened me. I never had felt protection. What monster have I become? I never understood love till after I came home.

Now, I barely wanted anyone to stop me. Watch me. Love me. It wasn't Darry or Pony or the gang or Soda's fault. I was mine. I didn't get what family was. Love protection and care. Never ever had I had it after age 5. I stared at everyone. They wanted the best for me. And I didn't.

That didn't help my crying status at all. I slid down on the wall and curled up. Tears fell down my face. I started sobbing. I wished I hadn't cause... I didn't want the attention. The love. I cried all the harder.

I heard footsteps and felt Soda's arm around me. Then Darry's arm. I leaned onto Soda's chest and cried there until finally I just fell asleep.

Aw, sister and brotherly love. Cute eh? So cheesy but hey, it was well needed. Think about it.
Life at her Girls Home was tough. No one truly could protect her or love her or watch her or show her right and wrong. She realized her brothers tried and she didn't understand at first. Baii!

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