Again (PUBLISHED!)

Chapter 41.1

I stepped out into the wintry night with anxiety in my breaths knowing that this would be the last time Devon would ever talk to me.

I walked the length of the deserted street illuminated hy the street lamps before taking a turn. I stopped short when I spotted Devon stood at a distance in the middle of the lane. Our eyes met. There was a moment of indecision where neither of us moved or spoke. My heart beats ran slow when I searched his eyes trying to gauge the words he'd use to dump me. But I was caught off guard when he awkwardly stretched his arms open and with a soft smile playing on his lips.

My heart swelled in joy and relief and I ran over to him. Devon staggered backwards a bit due to the force with which I collided into him. I threw my hands around his neck and hugged him tight.

"I'm sorry...." I sobbed against his shirt, squeezing my eyes shut as tears streamed down my cheeks. "I'm-I'm sorry for lying to you, Devon...I'm sorry for hurting you." I swallowed hard.

"It's okay—It's okay, Eleanor. Everything is fine," he whispered, wrapping his cozy arms tighter around me.

"You know everything about my past now, Devon," I said when we settled on the bench by the street side. "You know I'm not the girl you thought I was. You know I've issues too just like you. Why do you want to be with me inspite of knowing my reality? I am not good for you...."

"I want to be with you because you give meaning to my life," said Devon frankly. "You complete me, in the sense that I always find you in whatever I lack in myself. You have a void in your life. I have too. Perhaps that's why I've never felt lonely whenever I've been with you."

His solemn words touched my heart overwhelming my senses.

"It's just that I'm hurt because you found lying to me easier than trusting me to be with you after hearing your truth," he said in a pained tone.

"Believe me, Devon, I wanted to tell you everything but what held me back were the nightmares I got of you leaving me...." I told me all about the bad dreams that haunted me.

Devon seemed to grow grim and thoughtful after hearing me out. There was a look that crossed his face which I failed to understand.

"I really want to get into your head and punch that Devon on the face who gave you those fucking nightmares. How dare that scum fucking walk away from you?!!"

I giggled, feeling every misery fade away from me. Devon smiled.

"I fuck things between us, right?" I said.

"I do most of the times so that way you're legally allowed to do it once," he answered quirkily.

I laughed.

"I, uh, got something for ya," he said awkwardly as he stuffed his hand inside his jacket pocket to pull out a square box wrapped as a gift.

"What is it?" I asked in surprise.

"See for yourself. Hope you like it."

I carefully took off the beautiful gift wrap. It was a blood red color box. I opened it to find an exquisite white necklace with a shining double heart pendant. The two hearts were joined in a lovely way and the letters 'D' and 'E' were inscribed on the two hearts respectively.

"I know Valentine's Day is a week away but still," he said nervously.

""It's beautiful, Devon," I exclaimed, overwhelmed with happiness. "Thanks a lot! I'll treasure it. I loved it a lot!"

"You did?" he looked blankly at me as though he just didn't expect me to like his gift.

"Of course yes! I want to wear it," I beamed.

Devon hooked the necklace around my neck for me.

"Thanks, Devon," I said, feeling dazed looking into his eyes. "I'm feeling so free now that you know my truth. There would be nothing left in me if you'd walk away."

He held my face and as we kissed. I gripped his biceps tightly as he caressed my lips with his. I turned breathless when his hot tongue delved deep into my mouth filling every inch of my skin with ecstasy....

***

"Great that you're home, strawberry!" Gran said enthusiastically when she found me at the doorstep.

"The cake will be out of the oven in less than a minute's time, " Gran went on as I stepped inside the house. "I have tried something different with dark chocolate and French butter cream and I have given red layers to the cake too! I've a very good feeling about it! If it's successful, it will go down as a Great Secret Sanchez Cake Recipe!! And you know what else I've plan---"

"Gran Gran Gran, I need to tell you something important," I interrupted her grimly.

"Yes, ofcourse honey! I'm all ears," she said, looking at me fondly. "By the way, I love the necklace that you're wearing. Who has given it to you? Must be Luke! But I don't understand the 'D' and 'E'."

My heart sank in fear but I had to tell her what I intended to say. There was no backing off this time.

"Gran, that is what exactly I want to talk to you about," I said. "Luke didn't give me this necklace. Devon did. I am in a serious relationship with him. We really like each other a lot. Luke and I broke up long back."

Gran froze in utter shock hearing that. It took her a good few seconds to recover but when she did, her expressions turned rigid and hard.

"Is this some kind of a joke, Eleanor, 'cause it's pathetic and not expected from a well-behaved girl like you."

"It's not a joke, Gran. It's the truth which I'd been hiding from you all this while 'cause I didn't know how to tell you."

"And what about Luke?" Gran asked me coldly. "Did you leave him just like that? How long did you cheat on him with this Parker boy? How brutally did you dump a sweet and adorable boy like Luke for an evil uncivilized boy who went to prison thrice and is an absolute terror?"

"Gran, please! Don't talk about Devon like that! He ain't evil," I said. "I didn't dump Lu--"

"Listen to me, Eleanor," said Gran, looking panic-stricken and caught up in her own whirlwind of thoughts. "I want you to end everything with this Parker boy and go back to Luke. This is the right thing for you. I won't let you do something bad in front of my own eyes!!"

I grew pale hearing that. "I-I respect and adore you a lot, Gran. Please don't tell me to do something which I can never do."

But it didn't look like she had heard even a word of what I said.

"You can't do this, Eleanor...." she said frantically more to herself than to me, her eyes wide in shock. "You can't be like this...I've raised you properly....I've taken a lot of care to see to it that you don't turn out to be like this...But I was wrong...what is inbuilt, what is inherent cannot be uprooted....no matter how hard one tries...the dirty shadows are impossible to get rid of..."

I grew ashen faced hearing Gran. She was being weird....I couldn't understand her nor the context of her words.

"Gran, I don't get what you're saying but I do understand your coldness towards Devon," I said solemnly, "because he himself has instigated you---and rest of the neighborhood--to view him as this rebellious freak. But is it fair to judge people based on their present circumstances since it is our past experiences that heavily influence our present conduct. And none but you have taught me that, Gran..."

She didn't say anything. She wasn't looking at me. I doubted whether anything of what I just said since all she did was walk away as though in some sort of a stupor....