Baby Be Mine

Awkward

Chapter 17 - Awkward

I am an awkward girl, living a life full of awkward situations. Let's just say that lately my life has jut been riddled with this moments. That car ride home, oh well that was pretty much the definition of awkward.

"Gilbert," I called as he quietly walked inside.

"I have school work," he sneered.

My jaw dropped as I felt sharp twist in my chest. "I want to talk to you."

"I don't care!" he snapped.

"Gilbert," my voice cracked. I kneeled over and began to rub my eyes and face. I'm a grown adult, what the hell. I took a step back as I heard footsteps go up the stairs. I slowly dragged my body down the wall trying to choke back my childish outbursts. I took a deep breath, brushing my hair back. I rested my head on my crossed arms on my knees.

"Mom," his small voice called. I gasped lifting my head up, seeing Gilbert in front of me, his hands on my arms. "Will you be honest?"

"W-what?" I stammered shifting so I now sat on my legs.

"Am I ruining your life?" He asked.

"Oh sweet Jesus," I mumbled rubbing my eyes and face. "Gilbert, first of all, you're five years old and the fact that your asking me this worries me." I hesitated thinking, I slowly shifted so I was now kneeling. "You will never ruin my life. You will never be a mistake, and you will never have anything to do with anything bad in my life."

"But last night," Gilbert mumbled.

"Putting it simply, life isn't always going be great, but it isn't always going to suck," I explained.

"What?" Gilbert mumbled.

"Listen you're young, and I don't want to get into too many detail, besides if I do I might have an existential crisis," I stated.

"What?" Gilbert repeated slowly.

*********

My tired eyes slowly opened as I heard a voice above me.

"Rachel!" The voice shouted.

In a state of panic I quickly snapped open my eyes. I exhaled when my vision finally cleared and I saw Jazmin standing over me.

"You gave me a heart attack," I mumbled as I sat up.

"What are you doing sleeping at this time of the day?" Jazmin asked.

"It's called a nap," I replied.

Jazmin scoffed as she rolled her eyes, "what happen to not letting Gilbert sleep in your bed anymore?"

"It's been a long day, what do you want?" I mumbled.

"What I can't visit my best friend?" Jazmin sneered.

"Hi Aunt Jaz," Gilbert greeted in a sleepy voice .

"Hello sweet heart," Jazmin replied them turned to me with a stern expression. "We need to talk."

*******

"I can't believe you and Cass broke up," I stated a I set a mug of cold tea in front of her.

"Yeah she's currently moving out," Jazmin replied looking down at her drink.

"Mom!" Gilbert shouted as he ran into the kitchen. He stopped in front of me holding up a piece of paper. He quickly handed off to me then ran off.

"Parent Teacher Conference," I mumbled, "TOMORROW! GILBERT WHY DIDNT SHOW THIS TO ME EARLIER!" I shouted, I took a deep breath setting the paper on the counter. "Deal with that later," I stated as I sat down at the table.

"Cass is just so...ug," Jazmin mumbled, just by her expression I knew that what she had to say wasn't positive.

"Wonder how I'm going to explain this to Gilbert," I stated trying to change to subject. "Well I guess it shouldn't be that hard he's -"

"What's it matter?" Jazmin inturrupted.

"I'm sorry, what?" I asked.

"I mean he's not going to see her again so-" she explained.

"What!" I questioned, "why not?"

"Why should she?" Jazmin exclaimed, "she left us!"

"She left you," I sneered, holding back my desire to shout.

"She-" Jazmin argued before she got cut off.

"No!" I snapped, "Cass has been in Gilbert's life since he was a baby, if she wishes to see him who am I to stop her."

"A good friend!" Jazmin shouted.

"I am a mother too!" I exclaimed slamming my hands on the table, "and I've gotta put him first especially when it comes to bullshit like that!"

"Whatever," Jazmin sneered standing up, "I don't give a fuck!" She then storm out of the room and the house.

I slowly picked up the mug I was drinking out of and dumped the rest of it in the sink then placed the mug in the sink.

"What did you do this time?" Gilbert asked as he walked into the room.

"What!" I exclaimed turning around.

"Well, you and Aunt Jaz were shouting and you said that she shouts when you make dumb decisions," Gilbert explained.

I sighed, "well believe it or not I'm not the one making dumb decisions this time."

"Then what happen?" Gilbert asked.

I took a deep breath as I walked over to Gilbert, kneeling down, "sweetie, Aunt Jaz and Aunt Cass aren't together anymore."

"What happen?" He asked.

"They uh.... just don't love each other anymore," I shrugged. How exactly do I explain this, I know he can be smart but would he understand it?

"Oh," Gilbert mumbled, he turned his head down, remaining quiet for a while. I slowly stood up, looking down at him. Finally his head shot up staring fearfully at me. "Will you ever do that to me?" He exclaimed.

"What?" I questioned.

"Will you ever stop loving me?" He asked.

"What, no!" I exclaimed.

"Are you sure," he mumbled his head dropping back down.

"Yes!" I stated dropping to my knees, I placed both my hands oh his cheeks turning his head up so he was looking at me. "I will never stop loving you because you are my s-, I am your m-," I paused holding my breath," I love you." I finally said, then stood up.

"WHY WON'T YOU SAY IT!" Gilbert screamed scaring me.

"What!" I exclaimed.

"Why won't you say that I'm your son or your my mom!" He shouted.

"W-wha," I stammered. "Why can't you be a normal kid!" I shouted. "Normal kids your age don't ask questions, much less even think about it. Five year old boys are loud and destructive." I quickly bit my tongue realizing what I said.

The two of use stared each other down before he ran over to the table picked up the mug on the table and threw it on the floor, shattering it. My jaw dropped as I stared at the glass shards. Gilbert quickly looked up at me then ran out of the room.

"What is my life," I mumbled.

A/N:

Well I actually had this chaptered planned so I started writing this rather quickly. Well I only went with half of my chapter plan but I do have ideas for the next chapter.

Anyway thanks for reading and all comments and votes are appreciated for feedback and support!

Until next time!