Stuck In Between

Chapter 16

Throughout the car journey there was mainly silence between the three of us. The only available sound was the radio playing on a medium volume. And it was just my luck that due to the silence, I felt myself drift off into my thoughts again. No surprise at all that Cristiano was the hot topic in my mind.

I just felt so bad at the fact that there I was last night, being unfaithful to the man I love with all of my heart with my ex boyfriend, while Cristiano was far away in a hospital bed. It’s just disgusting. My behaviour was completely unacceptable and quite frankly I have no idea as to how I’m going to be able to live with myself from the constant reminder of it each and every day. I’m practically living a lie. A lie in which I never wish to get out into the open.

I’m more than one hundred percent sure that Cristiano will go absolutely crazy if he was to find out. Not only at Fabio, but at me also. And knowing him he’d go straight to Fabio’s the second he found out. Whether he is in hospital or back home with me. Nothing or even anyone would be able to stop him. So as much as this guilt is becoming too much for me to handle there is no way I’d be able to tell him exactly what happened. I guess I’ll just have to live with the guilt eating away inside of me. As that is the only option in which I have.

A little while later and I was soon distracted from my thoughts as I heard the husky like voice of Sergio coming from the passenger seat beside Mesut. Thank god, if I was left any longer just thinking things through then who knows what would have happened.

“Fabio seemed a little weird at training earlier, don’t you think?” Sergio came out with, his head looking in Mesut’s direction as he was driving. Ok, well I really didn’t expect that to come out of his mouth. If I’m honest I would have much preferred to continue with the thinking instead of hearing that. And it was at that moment that I felt myself sink in my seat before bringing my coffee up to my lips again and taking the final sip – trying my hardest to avoid the conversation.

“Actually yeah, now you come to mention it he was acting a little weird today.” Mesut started. I noticed as I looked at him that he furrowed his eyebrows while speaking. “He just seemed much happier today than his usual grumpy self.” A small and short laugh came out of Mesut’s mouth as he continued and he took a quick glimpse at Sergio before turning back to the road.

“You’ve got that right.” Sergio laughed along. And it was at that moment when I noticed him poke his head in between the two front seats so he had the perfect view of me. I immediately sunk deeper into my seat at this point – if that was even possible. “Speaking of Fabio, Nicole, has he spoken to you or anything since Cris has been in hospital?”

As soon as that sentence escaped Sergio’s lips I noticed Mesut looking through the mirror above him in the car at me. A sense of eagerness noticeable across the both of their faces. Wow, what a way to put me on the spot, right? “Um…he err…no he hasn’t spoken to me at all. The last time I saw him was that first day at the hospital.” I stuttered out with a lie. Well that was a close one right? It is in situations like this that I really do need to practise on my lying in tense conversation. I’m awful, I know.

Luckily for me, Sergio just nodded his head in response before turning back around and Mesut soon looked towards him also. Phew, now that really was a close one.

“Knowing Fabio, this is just the calm before the storm.” Sergio laughed, nudging Mesut as he spoke. And Mesut was quick to laugh along.

“You can say that again.” I uttered under my breath, as quiet as possible. Thank god they didn’t hear me though as there is no way that I’d be able to lie my way out of that one.

It was a small while later and we soon arrived outside the hospital. Once Mesut had parked the car, the three of us got out and began making our way inside. On our way inside I quickly threw my coffee in the bin – seeing as it was now finished – and in none less than a minute or so were soon inside.