Chapter Thirteen

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Recap:
"Let me hold your hand when you have anxiety. Let me hug you when your having panic attacks. Let me kiss you because your the most amazing, beautiful girl I have ever seen and I'm sorry for being a complete asshole and telling you I didn't feel the same because I do. Sara. I do. I love you. I love you Quinn Sara Zak." I said she just sat there staring at me with a blank facial expression. "Sam."

Sara's POV:
"Sam." I said. He looked at me. I weakly smiled. "If your asking me to be your girlfriend. Then man up and do it." I said. He chuckled then cleared his throat. "Sara. Will you be my girlfriend?" He asked. I nodded smiling. He pulled me in for a hug then rubbed my back while placing a gentle kiss on my forehead.

A few months later

Sara's POV:
I opened the door to our house and walked in dropping all of my stuff on the floor. "I miss my house." I said. The Jacks chuckled. I ran upstairs dragging my suitcases behind me in a hurry to get to my really comfy bed that has been waiting for me. Maddie was on her way over with Skate and we were gonna go out to eat as a celebration of us being back home. I climb into the acutely comfortable mattress that I have not been in for ages. I missed everything about this house. I even missed its captivating smell of lemons. Yes. We clean our house with this lemon shit that smells amazing.

After some procrastination. I walk to my bathroom and started the hot shower. I was ready for a nice steaming shower.

I climbed into the back seat of Johnson's car. The Jack's were in the front and Sam was sitting next to me. I leaned my head on his shoulder and laid there for a while listening to Drake. Sometimes I miss partying as much as I used to. Now it's a blunt here or a blunt there. Maybe a few sips of alcohol in between. It's getting better. I wish I could be like Sam and just quit right away. I still smoke cigarettes. I have no idea how to quit that. I still self harm. It's just how I am. My depression is getting a little better but it doesn't help with the harm part. My anxiety is getting worse. Sometimes I didn't want to walk out of the tour bus. Somethings seriously wrong with me. We finally arrived at the intricate place and parked the car. "Ready to celebrate?" Sam asked squeezing my thigh where he had rested his hand when I had gotten in the car. I nervously chuckled and got out of the car. I never really realized how many people would be here. I took a moment before walking in the same direction as Johnson and Gilinsky. Soon a hand snaked around mine giving it a little squeeze.

Sam's POV:
She was nervous. Ever since the tour her anxiety was through the roof. She jumped at tiny noises and sometimes even refused to come out of the tour bus. So I squeezed her hand. Hoping she would get the message that I was willing to leave at anytime and take her home in a cab. She squeezed back.

Soon we were seated and I could tell she was trying to stay calm but she wouldn't last long. Her knee was bouncing up and down letting me know she was ready to home. The food finally came and she quickly ate. She finished then stood up from her chair quickly. "Well. I don't feel very well so I think I'm just going to catch a cab and go home. Don't stay out to late." She said. I could feel her nervousness. It was basically exploding out of her. Her red, rosy cheeks were heated and her beautiful green eyes roamed around the whole restaurant hoping no one was judging her. Then she walked out of the busy crowded place. I nodded at the boys and followed her out. She had her arms wrapped around herself. "I'm done Sam." She said to me and I came up behind her. "This is to much. I just want to lock myself in my room and never come out again." She said. I took off my sweatshirt and handed it to her. She gladly excepted it and hailed a taxi.

Sara's POV:
I'm sick of fake smiles. I feel like I have to act happy or they'll see my feeling of unease. The perturbation that was just eating me alive from the inside. Like a slow painful death I was feeling the last straw getting closer each second. I agonize and overthink. If I get a question wrong I doubt myself. I have issues. I have problems. I'm intricate. I'm a maze that no one can solve and it's a matter of time before everyone leaves me. The cab finally turned on our street. I climbed out slowly behind Sam taking in the smell of his Old Spice cologne that he applies every morning after his beautiful body takes a shower. Sam was literally flawless. His eyes were alluring and his smile was prepossessing. His skin was soft. I saw no flaws. But when you look at me you see a lot. "What's on your mind gorgeous." Sam asked as we made my way to my room. "I don't want to be here anymore. I feel like I cause to much issues. Why out of all of the beautiful girls out there you chose me." I said taking a breath then sitting on my bed. "Out of all the beautiful skinny girls with flawless skin you chose me. Who has pudge on my stomach, thunder thighs, and is so pale that every time I try to tan I just get sunburned and end up with more freckles." Sam looked taking back. "First of all. Don't disrespect the freckles. I love your freckles. There so cute. And second of all. Your perfect. I love you the way you are and I don't want you to change a thing." Sam said pulling me into his chest. "Because. I like this Quinn. I like this Sara. And I'm pretty damn sure I like Quinn Sara Zak."

A/N
I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'm so glad schools almost over. Comment what grade your in. I'm in 8th.

Twitter: amber_caylen

Stay Beautiful🌺
Stay Cloudy☁️
Stay Amazing💙
Amber logging off✌🏻️
Byee😘😘

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