Oneshots- REQUESTS NEEDED

.Please Don't Leave Me

NOT ONE DIRECTION! I wrote this for a friend. Her boyfriend is leaving for the army next year and that had an argurment very much like this. I wanted inspiration and she said to do this so, I did. She doesn't know yet that i killed her boyfriend but she will get over it. READ ON MY MUNCHKINS!

'What do you mean you're going to the army!?' I screamed at my boyfriend Josh. What does he mean the army? He can't go to the army! He could get injured or even worse, killed. No! He can't go.

'Toni, it's exactly as I said, I'm enrolling for the army at the end of the year and that's it. Imagine the money we would have. I mean come on they pay recruits $34,000 a year! That's heaps. We could buy a house in no time and once I get promoted a few times we will be rolling in the money.' Josh argued back. As if I care about the money! I just don't want him to die, or to leave me.

'Josh! I don't care about the friggen money! I just want you here with me at home safe and sound and out of harm's way! Why do you even want to go? And don't tell me it's all about the money because I know for sure it isn't! Do you not want to be with me anymore? Is that why you're leaving? Please juts tell me.' I finished my part with tears in my eyes. What if he really didn't want me anymore? I don't know what I'll do. But if he just left I don't think it would be as bad as him actually dying. At least if he left it would be because of something explainable but if he was killed I would know that he was taken from me and that, that would be worse. I could never get him back. Ever.

'Toni, it's not like that. Of course I want you and there is nothing wrong with you so get that out of your head. I don't really want to leave you either but I have to if I want to do this. And I do want to do this. It's been my life dream to join the army for as long as I can remember but if you're going to be this unhappy about it I won't go. I want you to be happy too, even if I'm not fully happy.' Josh told me making me feel a little better before he added the last bit. I knew what he was doing. He was guilting me into letting him go. And damn it was working. He knew very well that I gave into him. It was never long before I gave him what he wanted no matter how much of a dick he was to me before-hand.

'No Josh, just go. You know you want to and I can't stop you. You know I wouldn't stop you. Not after what you just said. But I tell you now, if you end up dying I'm going to bring you back just so I can kill you myself. You got it? Now come here you idiot.' He chuckled a little bit at my comment and came over to me and wrapped his arms around my waist bringing me close to his chest. I laid my head down on his chest and shut my eyes just enjoying the fact that he was here for now, even though he would be leaving soon.

'Thanks chicken. Thanks for understanding my dreams. I8f you ever want to do anything I promise I'll be there to support you. I love you Toni.' Josh said kissing the top of my head. He pulled away and went back to the lounge room to sit and watch TV. I soon joined him and we snuggled on the couch watching a movie until we fell asleep.

Four months later...

Today is the day. Josh is leaving today. I really don't know how to feel about it. I guess you could my feelings are just on a high right now and I don't know what I feel. I am currently standing in the airport watching as he walks up the gangway and onto the aeroplane taking him away from me for the next two years. As he reaches the end of the walkway and is just about to enter the plane, he turns around and looks me in the eyes. He looks sad and I can see the start of tears in his eyes but there is also a hint of determination and maybe a little regret, I don't know. Maybe he regrets leaving me but he should know I will be here waiting for him to return. I would wait for him for forever. I smile a weak smile back to him to show him that I understand that he has to go, and to show him that I will love him forever and I'll always be here. He smiles back and mouths 'I love you' I do the same and he turns around again walking into the plane. As soon as he leaves my vision I burst out into tears. He hasn't even left yet and I can tell this is a bad idea. Something just doesn't feel right.

Three years later...

It has been two lonely years. Two years since he left me. He left me alone in this world to fend for myself and our daughter. Yes, daughter. I found out I was pregnant a couple of months after Josh left and it was hard at first. I knew I would have to be alone for the first couple of years with Josh only coming back in short periods every once in a while but I was going to manage. Besides that was nothing like what I have had to do, being alone completely. When I told Josh he was so happy! He ran around the base screaming that we were pregnant and that he was going to become a dad. I knew he would have been a great dad. He still held onto that childish part of him that most of us forget he even had.

When I was told Josh was killed our baby had just been born and luckily my mum was staying with me. If she wasn't there I don't think my baby would even be here today. I went into this whirlpool of depression and anger and just plain sadness. I was constantly exhausted and I just cried all day. I hardly ate and thought about suicide many times. I neglected my life and my child included. The only thing that kept me going is that tiny fragile shard inside of me that reminded me that I was now the only thing my baby had and I had to be there for them. So I cleaned myself up and got back into the swing of things. I had to learn to be a mother and how to look after my baby. It was hard but I would do it all over again for the blessing that I ended up with. My baby remind me of Josh every day and again in the beginning that was really hard to deal with but now I have learnt that their similarities are not a burden but a blessing in the sense that they will always have a part of him in them and a way to help remember him, for both me and my child.

I may have lost Josh himself but I will always have my baby and that is ok with me. Josh is a part of them and I am thankful that we were even given the opportunity to make something together. I miss him every day and it hurts just a little less each day too. I will always love Josh and I hope that wherever he is he loves me still too.

'I love you Josh. I miss you and so does our baby.' I set the rose on his military issue grave and press my fingers to my lips kissing them and then placing the kiss on the grave also. With that I walk away and back to my car where I drive back to my mums house to pick up my baby like every other time I go to visit Josh. I get back to mums and go inside. I pick up my baby and yell thanks to mum. She says that it's fine as I slip out the front door with my baby on my hip. 'Come on baby; let's get home.'