What is This Feeling? 〈H2OVanoss〉

Chapter 19 | Evan Fong

Evan's POV:

He didn't. It was a joke. He had to. He remembered Lui and- and David. He just had to. But he didn't; he didn't remember me; he doesn't remember me.

As he passed me, my heart, I could hear, just hear it, and my mind, all crack. My chest filled with pain. As if I had been stabbed - almost to the heart. I was a walking corpse at this point. I felt as if I was barely breathing; a body full of nothingness and oxygen; a waste at this point. At this point, it made me miss my sister - reminded me of her even.

~~

"Evan," she said. I lift my head up to her, seeing her head down. I ran over and sat down next to her.

"I-Is something wrong?" I ask.

Faith sniffles, "No, nothing's wrong. It's just-" she looked up, "-you're always so happy. Never change that, even when one day, I leave. That smile, it- it makes me smile,"

I smile at her, "I love you, sis, nothing will change."

"Promise?"

"Promise,"

"Pinky promise..?"

I giggled and connected our pinky fingers in a knot.

"Pinky promise."

~~

But in fact - I had broken that promise ever since the day she left. When Delirious came along, I thought that would change- no, I knew that would change- or I had hoped.

I didn't bother to go to class. I ran straight to the bathroom. Luckily, it was all empty and cleared. I placed my hands on the sides of the sink. I stared at my.. broken, tiresome, disgusting, face. My eyes - you could tell - were lost. Just as lost as I was inside.

"F-Fuck me.. K-Kill me.. J-Just.." I broke down in tears and couldn't help it. As stupid as it was, as dramatic as it was, I just fell and sat there, curled my legs up and hugged them to my chest.

I didn't believe in a chance anymore. I was at the point of giving up; forgetting it all.

"E-Evan?" A familiar voice echoed through the bathroom. I peeked my head up, cheeks wet and nose stuffed.

"Evan!?" Luke slide to my side and rubbed my back.

"L-Luke.. W-What are y-you d-doing here?" I asked, managing to even get a word out.

"I should be asking you that," he said.

I shook my head and just rested my head on my knees.

He sighed and wrapped his arms around me. "I'm sorry. Is it about.. erm.."

I just nodded slowly, letting him pity me, as much as I didn't like it, I suppose I needed someone to comfort me. Luke was a good friend. Putting up with my shit. My dramatic ass.

He pulled me closer and patted my shoulder. "I can tell there's something else.. but if you do not want to talk about it, that's alright,"

I sighed and gave in.

"It's Delirious. He-he doesn't remember me. I-I know, i-it's so f-fucking s-stupid to cry ov-over, but.." I hiccuped through.

"It's not- you're fine, I'm here.." He whispered and hushed me, letting me sob. Once more he said, "I'm here,"

I just rested my head on his chest, letting my hiccups keeps going and breathing steadily to calm my panic attack down. It's the worst thing when I cry. I just don't breathe. But Luke.. I cannot thank him enough.

I continued to sit with him. Even when my crying was done, he stayed as well.

--

"E-Evan.. Evan wake up," Luke whispered as I blearily opened my eyes. My cheeks felt dry and sticky. I remember crying, with Luke.

"O-Oh! I fell asleep! Shit! I'm so sorry you should've woken me up sooner and gone to class and I'm so fucking sorry-"

"Evan, Evan, Evan.." He said, shushing me, "you're fine, I'm fine. A teacher came in here awhile ago and gave us a pass. Don't worry about it,"

"But you should've had to deal with me.." I muttered.

"Evan, look at me." He pulled my chin, making me look at him. Our eyes connected. We were practically nose to nose.

"I'll always be here for you, because I'm your best friend..and that's what we do. Make our best friend feel better,"

I felt my face get hot as I nodded slightly and smiled a small smile.

"Okay, how about we go get some coffee at Starbucks? Would that make you feel a bit better?" He asked.

I frowned a bit, "I-I don't have any money.."

"I'll buy it, it's fine. Anything for my sad friend!" He chuckled.

I smiled as he got up and lend me a hand to get up as well. I felt better. Not completely better, but well enough to give an effort at being happy.

--
Delirious' POV:

My eyes shifted around the room. Something was missing from this classroom. Something in my chest felt.. empty.

The bell rang and the halls flooded with students as I joined. Out of the mens bathroom, I noticed two vaguely familiar figures exit - they were hand in hand walking out of the school in a quick manner. Mostly it being the end of the day and wanting to leave early, but their intentions seemed to bug me. Yet I didn't even know them.

Lui tapped my shoulder as I turned to see him, a smile plastered on his face.

"Hey, wanna get something to drink with me?" He asked, pulling out some cash.

"I don't have any-"

"You're fine, I'm feeling generous today! C'mon! Don't tell the guys though," he laughed at the end, grabbing my arm and dragging me out of the school.

We entered a Starbucks and Lui ordered our drinks as I sat at a table. When Lui arrived and sat with his and my drink, I noticed two people across the establishment, sitting and talking.

They were the two from earlier. Suddenly, one of them stood up, wearing some sunglasses, and took the hand of the one with a red jacket. He stood up as well. Then out of nowhere, they kissed, their lips, together. A pang had hit my chest, instantly, my mind, my heart, a feeling of hurt. But another word. That's when I remembered it; no them; no him.

Evan Fong.

----

Sorry these chapters have been a bit shorter. :/ been busy and trying to get ahead of my writing.