His Mission

Losing my Sanity.

Jake's POV

The bag swings back and forth with the force of the impact. Harder. Faster. Stronger. My fist collides against the leather repeatedly until I feel my lungs scream out for a break. Beads of sweat drip down my face and chest. I grab hold of the bag before resting my forehead against it. My chest heaves up and down as I attempt to catch my breath. Before I'm fully recovered, I get right back into it. Each punch provides me with an element of relief. I punch because I'm worried for Emily's safety. I punch harder because I'm worried about Amil and my involvement with the gang. I punch again because I'm furious at Tobias. I punch because I want to go back in time and finish Trevor off when I had the chance.

I punch until my red knuckles throb from the pain. The pain feels bittersweet. Feeling pain means I'm making progress. Making progress means I'm one step closer to becoming stronger, which means I can keep Emily safe. That's all I want. That's my girl and I'd do anything to take away the fear she's been drowning in for most of her life. Her sweet face flashes through my mind and my lips immediately tug upward into a soft smile. Fuck, I have it bad for her. I think about her large doe-like eyes. She captured my heart before stamping her name all over it. Her sweet smile flashes through my thoughts and I release a soft groan. I should be used to the stirring whenever I think about her, but it takes me by surprise every time. I end the workout before reaching for my water bottle. Now that my thoughts have been infiltrated by her, I won't be able to concentrate. I guzzle down the liquid before reaching for my phone. There's no text messages or missed calls from her.

I release a low humoured laugh. What happened to me? I went from not caring about anyone to wanting to see her contact flash up on my phone all day long. I could listen to her talk for hours. When I'm not around her, I re-read our text messages just to feel the heat spread through my chest. Yeah, I definitely have it bad for her. Falling for her initially terrified me, but I've learned to embrace the feeling.

I'm about to head to the shower when my bedroom door flings open. Tobias stands in the doorway with a look of panic on his face. "Are you lost? Get out of my room." I say to him with an edge to my voice. He's one of the reasons I slam my fists daily into the punching bag hanging in my room. My relationship with him is more strained now than it ever has been. I don't trust him and I don't know if I'll ever learn to trust him again. Thinking about his betrayal causes my hands to ball into tight fists, and I get the urge to turn back around and continue working out. Tobias holds up his phone and his dark eyes flash with worry.

"It's Emily. She's in trouble," he tells me. His words cause my heart to slam into the front of my chest. The air is sucked out of the room in an instant. "What do you mean, she's in trouble? What the fuck does that mean, Tobias?" I yell at him.

"I didn't do anything, okay? She called me. Get your shit. I'll explain while I drive," Tobias tells me. I grab my jacket before scurrying down the stairs. Tobias is directly behind me. His words bounce around my mind on a continuous loop. Emily called him even though she's in danger. Why would she go to Tobias and not me? The thought feels like a sharp kick to my stomach. Jealousy, worry and fear brew inside me.

Fear isn't an emotion I'm accustomed to feeling. I can't remember the last time I felt fear over someone else's wellbeing. Emily came into my life and thawed the ice surrounding me. I sometimes wonder whether it's easier to walk through life with no emotions...Just like Tobias.

I turn to look at him as we both head in the direction of his black sports car. Could there be more to his relationship with Emily than I initially thought? No. No way. I trust her with my life. She would never hurt me and besides, I can't be worrying about that now. Emily needs me. Tobias fills me in on his phone call with Emily as he drives. "Are you fucking kidding me? She's meeting with Jones?" I ask through clenched teeth. Why would she do something so dangerous? Does she have any idea what type of crazy she's dealing with when it comes to Jones? I pull out my phone to call her. My leg bounces up and down with impatience as I wait for her to answer.