His Mission

Comfort from beyond the grave.

It's early morning, which means the streets are almost deserted. I'm grateful for the solitude and quiet. I don't want to be surrounded by people while I'm fighting back tears. I walk until the expanding tightness in my chest begins to loosen. I walk until my legs burn from the strain. I don't stop walking until I push through the iron gates. They squeak due to the disturbance, and I begin the route I have memorised. Black crows flutter above me and the trees sway back and forth due to the wind. Many people don't like visiting a graveyard. I suppose it reminds them of the thing they fear most; death. It's a bleak reminder that we're all going to end up in the same place eventually. Buried deep with nothing but our legacy left behind... That's if we create one during our lifetime. I walk until I come face to face with his grave. My hands reach up to wipe away the fallen tears on my cheeks. I don't want him to know I've been crying.

"Hey, Dad." I whisper before dropping down beside him. His gravestone is covered in weeds, broken branches and piles of leaves. I'm hit with immediate guilt, and I begin clearing them away to uncover his headstone. My fingers brush over the carving of the words loving father. My heart squeezes tightly with pain and I feel my bottom lip wobble unsteadily. I bite down on the inside of my cheek to suppress my cries.

He'd hate knowing I was so broken, yearning for his presence to bring me comfort or a line of good advice. Dad always gave the best advice. He always knew the right thing to say and the right thing to do. He lived with good morals and a kind heart. I remember him always being surrounded by light and laughter. He had so many friends, many of whom have disappeared from my life since his death. I must be a painful reminder of their friend who was taken too young. "Have you got any advice for me, Dad?" I whisper before resting my head against his headstone. I draw my knees into my chest before closing my eyes. The wind whistles around me, and I feel a level of temporary peace wash over me. I exhale a deep breath as I picture his face in my mind.

"I know you believe everything happens for a reason. You always told me to trust the universe. I never understood why the universe took you away from me." I whisper. A single tear slips from my eye before rolling down my cheek. "What was the reason? It's almost been a decade, yet nothing good has come from your death. It's been nothing but pain," I cry softly. Small gasps escape through my chest and I make no effort to hide them. I can't suppress my cries even if I tried. I silently hope he isn't listening to me right now so he doesn't hear the broken tone to my voice.

I've been sitting with Dad for hours. It's been so long, the sky is beginning to darken in the late afternoon. The damp heavy clouds hang above me, threatening to unleash their storm over me at any moment. I can taste the rain in the air, but I don't attempt to find shelter. I want to stay right here with him. I feel my phone vibrate inside Jake's hoody. I reach for it before glancing down at the screen. He called me several times before sending me a series of text messages. I know he's worried about me, but I don't have the energy to talk to him right now. I don't want to immerse myself back into my world. I want to ignore all of my worries, just for a few more hours. I hold down the power button on my phone before it turns black. I need to be left alone.

*

The wind is beginning to pick up speed. It whips around me harshly, causing goosebumps to scatter over my skin. I wrap my arms around myself in an attempt to stay warm. I hear footsteps crunching on the leaves behind me. I remain sitting next to Dad's headstone, figuring the footsteps will eventually disappear. "Emily," the voice calls out. My head snaps to the right, and I find Jake standing several feet away from me. His face is a mixture of concern and relief. I tear my eyes off him in protest.

"How did you find me?" I mutter while avoiding eye contact with him. Jake hesitates to respond to my question. My face contorts with protest when I realise he's keeping more secrets from me. "If you can't respond with honesty, I have nothing to say to you."

Jake inhales a sharp breath and his palms find their way to his eyes. I press a soft kiss to my fingers before brushing it over the top of Dad's headstone. "I have to go, Dad. I love you," I whisper before standing to my feet. I take one last look at his grave before turning around and walking away. The clouds begin to part and the heavy rain finally makes its appearance. It falls from the sky at a rapid pace and it feels angry. I can't find shelter quick enough, so I don't fight against it. It drenches me within seconds. "Emily!" Jake calls out my name. I don't stop to turn around.

"You want honesty? Fine. I'll give you honesty," Jake shouts in my direction. I pause before slowly turning around. His dark hair is stuck to his forehead from the rain. His t-shirt is completely soaked through, and his blue eyes are filled with desperation. He takes a careful step toward me before his expression softens. "I found you because Amil is tracking you," Jake tells me. My heart immediately picks up pace in my chest.

"What did you say?" I question him in disbelief. I'm being tracked by a potential gang leader? My cheeks turn pale and the rain continues to beat down on me. Jake runs his fingers through his dark hair to push it out of his forehead. He takes another step toward me and his ocean eyes fill with apology.

"I shouldn't have introduced you to him. He doesn't trust you not to go to the police, so he's been tracking you ever since you walked away from him. He called me with your location an hour ago," Jake tells me. I feel sick to my stomach. Amil knows where I am at all times? How is that possible? "What does he want with me?" I ask in a shaky voice.

"Nothing. He doesn't want anything. He's tracking you for his own benefit." Jake tells me. I glance around the graveyard with slight panic. I thought I was alone this whole time, but has somebody been watching me? Jake gestures at the bulge in his hoodie pocket. It's my phone. "It's through your phone, Wentworth." Jake tells me.

"That... asshole!" I cry out in disbelief. I whip my phone out before sliding out the sim card. I snap it in half before dropping it to the floor. I won't allow Amil to track me a minute longer. "Let's go home. It's cold and you've been out here for hours. You look like you're freezing." Jake says, raising his voice so he can be heard over the rain. I look up at him with a saddened expression. "Home? I don't have a home. How can you expect me to come back with you when I know nothing about you, Jake?" The rain slides down my face before invading my mouth. I feel the cold beginning to seep its way inside my body, invading me with every minute I spend in the rain.

"That's not true. Tobias said those things to hurt you and hurt me! If you come back with me, I can explain myself. I swear it's not what you think." Jake pleads with me. I hear the desperation in his voice, but I can't help feeling like there's a barrier between us. Tobias may have intended to hurt me, but his words hold an element of truth behind them. "Please, Wentworth." Jake says, lowering his voice to a hushed tone. He extends his hand for me to take and I stare down at it with hesitancy. Before I can make my decision, Jake comes storming over to me. His hand wraps around my chin and the other slides around my waist. He tugs me toward him before kissing me with desperation.

His kiss speaks a thousand words. I can feel his apology seeping through with every stroke of his lips. His tongue brushes against mine and he pulls me closer for more. He kisses me like he's dependent on my oxygen. He kisses me like he's running out of time and he's desperate to be left with the pressure of my lips on his. I don't realise I'm crying until he pulls back and swipes at my cheeks. My tears mingle with the rain and I stare into his eyes with a broken expression.

"I want you, Emily. I want you so badly, it physically hurts my being." Jake tells me before brushing my hair out of my face. His words bury their way deep into my heart and I cling onto his shirt with desperation. He keeps his hands nestled against my cheeks and he pulls me closer to rest his forehead against mine. His eyes flutter closed and he takes deep breaths to calm the raging storm inside him. My heart yearns to fall in his arms and kiss him with everything I have left, but my mind remains guarded. I gently pry myself out of his embrace.

"I can find my own way back," I whisper, my shoulders sinking in defeat. Jake's eyes flash with pain and his face contorts with a deep sadness. I turn around to walk away from him and the sudden movement causes my head to fill with a buzzing sound. Has the intensity of his kiss left me weak and unable to stand? My upper body feels like I'm floating and I quickly realise I haven't eaten all day. I stumble forward to reach for a headstone, but I'm not quick enough. The cold mixed with the weakness in my body merges together until my legs give way underneath me. "Emily!" Jake yells with panic. He comes rushing over to me, but I can barely hear him through the inner noise consuming me. The buzzing sound in my head grows louder and louder until I feel the familiar darkness begin to wash over me. My eyes flutter closed and I find myself falling to the ground.