Look At Me: A Kelena Fanfiction

Chapter 6

Katherine's POV
Waking up alone used to be my least favorite thing in the entire world.

I used to need someone next to me, need someone to to touch, need someone to be there when I woke up.

But I became accustomed to waking alone over the last hundred years, as I did it regularly.

There was no one that I wanted to wake up with by my side, until today.

And yet I woke up alone, despite what I wanted.

The room I was in was unfamiliar in that early morning state where you're not sure if you're awake or asleep.

All I could tell was that the room was bright, I was alone, and I could hardly remember what had happened yesterday.

As I sat up and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes, I realized that the bright room I had been sleeping in was Elena's room.

The room where I had left her.

I shook my head, trying to shove the memory out of my brain. It had been in there far too often this week.

Instead, I tried to remember what had happened last night, and why the hell I was here.

While I was racking my brain for details about the previous day, Elena's door swung open, and she walked in.

"Oh, Katherine! Hi!" she said, smiling brightly.

Her smile was infectious, and I couldn't help but smile back.

"Hello, Elena. Why am I here, exactly?"

She looked confused for a minute.

"You mean you... Don't remember?"

I shook my head, leaning back on the bed.

She began playing with a piece of hair, avoiding meeting my eye.

"I mean, you were kind of out of it... You were saying some... Strange things."

She must have seen my expression, because she immediately started talking again.

"You weren't saying anything bad or anything... You were just..."

I rolled my eyes.

"Elena, I swear, if you don't tell me what the hell I was saying-"

"Fine." she interrupted me.

"You were saying that I needed to leave, that you weren't... You weren't right for me... Telling me that..." she stopped for a minute, biting her lip as if she was trying to stop herself from crying.

"Telling you what, Elena?" I asked her.

"You were trying to convince me that I didn't love you anymore, when I do..."

She turned away from me.

"I need a minute, Katherine." she said, walking out of the room quickly.

That night had come back to me now, and I remember everything that had happened: my revelation, what I had told Elena, how out of it I had been.

Damn it. I had really scared her, hadn't I?

Of course, she hadn't seen it happen before, she hadn't been a vampire long enough.

Strange things start happening if you die enough times as a vampire. When you wake up, after being dead, you start doing strange things. You begin hallucinating, saying things you don't mean, doing things that you would normally never do as yourself.

I suppose you could consider it a side effect of being an unnatural creature. A side effect of being a vampire.

And again, of course Elena didn't know that. Stefan and Damon were much younger than me, so they hadn't experienced that yet, and so Elena had never known anything like that to be real.

And so it had terrified her.

Oh god.

I stepped off of the bed and walked out of Elena's room, stopping by the bathroom when I heard a noise from inside.

It was Elena and she was clearly crying, probably still shaken about last night, and everything I had said and done.

"Elena?" I said, knocking softly on the bathroom door.

"Katherine, can I just have a minute?" she replied, her voice choked up.

I sighed and slid down on the door so I was now sitting against it.

"Elena, I just wanted to tell you that I didn't mean anything I said last night. It's this thing... I can't really explain it, but it's basically that I'm not me when I wake up from having been temporarily killed."

"What?" she asked, her voice a lot clearer now.

"Like I told you, it's really complicated, but I just say things I don't mean, and I do things I wouldn't normally do. So, last night wasn't me, Elena, not really."

There was silence for a minute.

"Elena, you still there?" I asked, placing my ear against the door to listen.

"Yeah." came the quiet response.

"So, you didn't mean it when you told me that I shouldn't love you anymore?"

I sighed, considering the answer. My plan was to leave after this, after Elena got her humanity back. My plan wasn't to have her love me anymore.

"Well, I mean, what is there to love about me? Practically nothing." I tried to jokingly reply, in an attempt to ease out of the topic at hand.

In an instant, the door was open and I was practically thrown across the room by Elena's new strength, that she clearly didn't know how to use.

She walked close to where I had been pushed by the door and sat down next to me.

She took my hand in hers, and our fingers intertwined, her hand gripping mine tightly.

"There is everything to love about you, Katherine." she said, staring deeply into my eyes.

The intense eye contact was making me uncomfortable, so I turned away, but she took my chin and turned me back to face her.

"Look at me." she said.

My heart rate was speeding up with everything she said and with every finger she put on my body.

"Okay." I said breathlessly, looking into her eyes once again.

"There is everything to love about you." she repeated.

"I love how much strength you have, how much courage-"

I laughed bitterly at that.

"Yeah, enough courage to run away from everything in my life."

She shook her head and continued talking.

"I love how beautiful you are-"

"You're basically complimenting yourself. You realize we look exactly the same, right?"

Again, she shook her head, and she moved closer to me.

I felt like my heart would burst out my chest any second.

No, this was not what I was here for. I promised that I would get the hell out of here as soon as I was done with Elena, what was I doing?

As Elena opened her mouth to tell me more ridiculous things that she loved about me, I stopped her.

"I hope you realize that I'm a complete bitch, Elena."

She nodded.

"I do. I know you're a bitch, Katherine, and that's why I love you. That's what makes you who you are."

Before I knew what was happening, her lips were on mine, and my hands were tangled in her hair, and I wasn't focusing on anything else besides the fact that she tasted like sugar.

And that I loved her.